3 Just Before You Kill Your Wife (1/2)
There are so many reasons to kill your wife, a wife, any wife. I knew this even before I got married. So I am not going to debate that with you after ve years of marriage.
If I want, I can call you stupid – stupid for ignoring that warning written on the gwomgworo 911 lorry, plying the OnitshNsukka road that says, ”Fear Women.” You did not fear women. You stubbornly went ahead and got married. I wanted to say, ”Ntoo,” but I didn't because what I intend to say here is serious, and I do not want to lose you.
So let's jump to the reasons why you may need to kill your wife.
She makes more money than you do. Okay, it's not really the higher earning power that p.i.s.ses you o , it is the spending. She does not hand the paycheque to you so you can decide what it should be spent on. Okay, I know. You don't really want her to hand the money over to you, you are not that kind of bushman. In fact, you don't even care what she spends it on. You just don't want her to demean you in the manner that she spends the money. Yes, like putting up a storeyed building in her father's compound when your parents still live in a mud house. After all, you brought her to America and paid her school tuition as well as the mortgage while she studied nursing. You did that by driving a taxi. You deserve more respect.
Ha, she came from a well-to-do family. Yes, the elite high society family. You got to marry her because you live in America. America nulli es status and allows you to cross the social line. You lied to her about what you were doing in America. But you have since resolved that. You thought she only married you just to come to America, but you have had three kids and you have forgotten about that fear. You have begun real estate agent cla.s.ses, so you will soon be wearing suit and tie. But now, her family is telling her what to do. She is listening to them. They are treating you like trash. Yes, especially that evil mother-in-law. They won't back o from your marriage. Everyone is still mocking you. You brought her to America, and this is the thanks that you get.
You did not tell me, but I heard it through the wideopen grapevine. She is following other men. She did not tell you that you were not satisfying her in bed or that you are too old for her. But she is following younger men, some half your age. No, it wasn't the akata men that made you mad; it was other Nigerian men who now tell everyone that your wife is ”Mrs Donatus.” It breaks your heart and makes you feel impotent when you know you are not. You have even gone out of your way to buy books and lms just to help improve your s.e.x life. But it looks like it is too little too late. It doesn't seem like she will come back to you.
Didn't I hear you say that she isn't beautiful anymore? You said you needed to nd younger women to make you feel young again. But being as stubborn as she is, she won't let you be. She keeps following you around, threatening to divorce you and take you to the cleaners. You have said to her that if it were in Africa, you would have married an additional three wives. I hear you. You need to do something to stop her. The nagging, the ghting, and the threat to half of all you worked very hard for. I hear you.
Just Before You Kill Your Wife
The insurance business you have been building for the last twenty years.
I heard that the judge awarded her $3000 in child support money every month. He also gave her and the kids your home. Add that to the $3000 she makes in a month and you will see why she has so much money that she throws around with one boyfriend after another. Meanwhile, you make $4000 a month and after paying her the money that she squanders, you are left with $1000. It is not enough to pay the rent in your small apartment. Not enough to begin your life again. Now, she doesn't even want you to have visitation rights. She lies to the judge that you are a threat to your own children, just like she lied that you make more money than you actually do. It is provocative. I know.
She said she went to university in Nigeria. You brought her here and had hoped to send her to nursing school. She could not pa.s.s even the CNA cla.s.s. She has failed nursing entrance examination four times. She is so dumb that you often think she needs help crossing the road. She is good at watching TV. That's it. She won't even keep the house clean.
She is a liability you need to get rid of as safely as possible.
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There are many reasons to kill your wife, a wife, any wife. I bet you can come up with more and more.