Chapter 38 (1/2)
Chapter 38
Chapter 38: Carnival of one
I watch in silence as the scenery zooms by the train’s s It’s already January, and winter is at its full height The leaves are brittle and the trees are nothing but dried husks—the entirety of which forms a picture as bleak as my soul at this moment
A cup of steareen tea is put down in front ofa quick thanks
My ‘boss’ sits down next to h
[T/N: If you recall, her ‘boss’ is not her employer, but the head of history department and advisor to the time-travel project]
“Stop thinking about it After you go back, just hit the books and study well Your graduation is in July, better start thinking about finding a job soon”
I make a noncommittal sound in reply and wrapthe s
I was bedridden for three months after I returned [to this era] The doctors said it was fortunate I ed to return in tie iant Northface backpacks I wore on my back had eased the impact of e The doctors had to perforery to cut off the rotten part of rowth of new tissue Even after all of that, er as flexible as it was before Perhaps this is the price one pays for changing history?
I submitted a detailed report on my physical condition to the researchers, who then ordered for a full-body examination, after which they concluded that the a in my body after four tier fit to continue on with the project I had tried to persuade them to allow me to cross one last time But I could not even cross the barrier that is my boss, let alone the researchers Boss said I have to recuperate, takesfro, and boss doesn’t want me to have to deal with health complications later on
Guilt continues to plague uments with the research team upon my return, after which he decided to withdraw frohts about this time-travel nonsense from now on, because our university had already cut all ties with the project, and that as soon asme back to school Naturally, I received a ‘bonus salary’ for all h to cover the bare minimums for several years even if I don’t work Once the bank bookbut bitterness
Return to school? How long has it been since I was last on campus? I have missed so many classes, will I be able to catch up? Boss tried to co he will help me with my studies
Those heavy backpacks I brought back were of monumental value My notes and the ancient books I copied [by hand] will need further study, and I am to help the experts with this I had turned over alifted me, the handkerchiefs he put in my cabinet for me to carry when I’ave me
Is this how my tiraduate program, I had rarely attended classes, and instead devoted most of my time to this time-travel project At 22, I started to prepare for the experiment; at 23, I crossed successfully; and at 24, I returned full of injuries The past two years, have I only been living a drea around my neck, I would not be able to believe that I had actually breathed, lived and loved in an era 1,650 years ago… If I were to co Zi who dreamed he was a butterfly, or the butterfly who drea Zi?
[T/N: refer to Ch6 for further explanation of Zhuang Zi’s dream]
My return to school proves to be quite the sensation My teachers, class while, all turn wide-eyed when I show up That evening, my friends take me out for a s to our heart’s content until I realize with a jolt that it’s already 2a time
It takes reat s surprise me these days
It’s as if I a to earth for the first tied The econoripped by inflation The price of a steamed bun in our school’s cafeteria has increased tenfold as a result The stock round for the elites only has now turned into a prison for all Gas prices have gone up, which explain why the teachers have begun to use buses to get to work, with so so far as to use their BMW Motorrad’s The st students nowadays is the fil topic is how the governht abolish May 1st [holiday]3 next year
1 Change’e, originally known as Heng’e, is the Chinese Goddess of the Moon and a subject of several Chinese legends, one of which is the origin behind Mid-Autumn Festival (8th full moon of the Lunar Calendar)
2 A 2007 erotic espionage fil Lee, based on a novella of the sa
3 International Workers’ Day, aka Labour Day or Workers’ Day, is a public holiday in many countries In China prior to 2008, it was a three-day holiday, but is now only one day
[T/N: Remember, FBFY was published in 2007, so it makes sense that Xiao Chun used events relevant to China during that time period]
Pretty irls’ dormitories has a boyfriend now The moment the sun sets, they would all put on ether I’ the weekend The rest of the smile on their faces
They all feel sorry for , I would have had a boyfriend by now, and how unfortunate it is that the boys in our class who once expressed interest intone, telling the these boys otherwise?
When I go shopping with the girls, they all say that I’m too old-fashi+oned and don’t kno to follow the trends It’s not that I’ too fast There are times where I miss that world dearly—a world without pollution, without city noises, where life is sirapes andand sweet I ht smiles and pure hearts
Someti as though I’ve just caught a glist the crowds of people I would chase after that person, only to realize it’s someone I don’t know Sometimes, a loeet voice would travel past my ears, and I would look around frantically to no avail every ti the everywhere and nowhere, before I collapse onto the sidewalk and burst into tears, ignoring the surprised looks other people give me The modern human has evolved to the point where their spine is sturdy and strong no h, I would just wipe my eyes and continue on No one has ever stopped to ask ht of my tears
Turns out loneliness is not innate, but so born the moment you fall in love with someone
A leaf is a wing that can never fly
And a wing is a leaf that fell from heaven
Heaven should not be a fantasy
But I have long forgotten
How I ed to fly in the first place
Loneliness is a carnival of one
And a carnival is a gathering of the lonely
To love is to keep someone company
Except I’ve started to forget
How it feels like to be in your company