Chapter 37 (1/2)
Chapter 37
Chapter 37: Pusysdeva’s Side Story (Part 3)
[T/N: Note that this chapter is written in Pusysdeva’s perspective]
[…]
After thinking through, I becoretful of what I did that dayI didn’t know about her injuries, and my boorish actions had only served to undo allher affectionAfter we return to the State Preceptor’s Residence, she starts to avoid ht she has finally become accustomed to my touches, I went and did that… But I have no time to dwell on the topic any further as father has fallen illI thought to ize to her after father recovers
But father did not h that illnessMy beloved father passes away, bringing with hi my motherI did not feelwhileIt is only now that I finally understand father’s woes, having fallen in love at lastI should have listened to father s thatmy sincere remorse
I propose to her, even though the past month has told ive her the one thing my brother cannotBut it’s too lateI cannot win, have never once won in factThere is a hollow feeling inher love for hiht me what [romantic] love is, but just when I have finally learned how to love, you then tell me that you have never loved me
During the ti and hard about sShe chooses to leave because she wants hireat of a personI love her so I will find every way possible to
With that thought, I decide to steal her braceletThe Han has a legend about a celestial fairy who descended to the earth one day and had her clothes stolen by ain a lakeWithout her clothes, she could not return to the heavens, and so she stayed with thehe was the thief] and end is real
[T/N: It isn’t, you foolish boyAnd even if it is a real story, a relationshi+p based on lies can never lastJust ask the Han on the ending to that story]
As it turns out, she really cannot return to the heavens without that braceletI then arrange for her to coets injured once againI cry when the physician announces that her arm has become too infected and amputation will be necessary if she wants to preserve her lifeThis is no doubt the punish to force a celestial being to stay hereBut why did the punishive uplike this
I have given it a lot of thought before deciding to send so at those sketches, I knew I have totally lostI have lost since ten years agoIf that’s the case, Iher suffering…
Unfortunately, we are unable to stall for anyto the heavensI give her back the bracelet and assist her in putting on that strange outfit, and then help her gather all her belongings into that unfathoFro us, I will never be able to see her againI will never be able to find that warmth and sincerity in anyone else
But I ed to aze at her one last ti at the doorsOne day up there equals ten years down hereThis tiet how she looks likeBy the tirey hair, toothless and hazy-eyed, but I hope she would still recognize me then
I close the doors and step back into the courtyardI lift aze at the sky, where she will soon return toWith tears strea down er a child anymore
The outer gates suddenly burst openHe stuh, his face deathly paleOne look atforward to her roo her words about how no one ht that emits when she leaves
Unable to overco out her name at the doorsIt’s a kind of wail that rese scream, one that is filled with so much helplessness and despair that even I am shocked by its intensityIn thatjealous of himHe is just like meJust another poor soul who is unable to actualize his love
When we step into the rooht: Did she really exist? Or was she s are empty of intrinsic existence and nature…what about her?
His hands tres on the tableThere is blood on them, which has dried into dark criht pure smileHe collapses onto the bed and drops his head on top of the drawings, his shoulders clearly shakingI leave the room in silence, look up at the sky and take a deep breath, then set off searching for my uncle Bai ZhenI must live well until she returns
He ends up htI instruct the servants to bring him food every day but leave him undisturbed otherwiseWhenever people fro for him, I make up excuses that he is ill and needs to restI a and everyone in the household, and that includes him
He finally e much more frail than usual, but his eyes are still as clear as everThe two of them, despite the difference in eye colours, both share the saazeI may not lose to him when it comes to appearances, but I can never possess that kind of clarity in aze, the kind that only people with pure souls like him can have