4 Chapter 1 - Pagnanasang Bilad (2/2)

Tumango, ngumiti at umupo ako sa tabi ni Mecky. First year high school ko pang seat mate itong si Mecky Elisabeth Herher. Mahilig kasi siya magaral kaya gusto ko siya katabi at nahahawa akong magbasa ng libro o magreview ng mga notes.

”Sana walang seating arrangements no, para tabi na nga tayo,” tugon ko. She smiled in agreement.

Si Mecky ang pinaka close kong kaibigan sa school. Halos parehas din kasi kami ng image; maaral, simple, mahinahon, 'yung tipong walang kaaway. Mas introvert nga lang 'tong si Mecky kaysa sa akin, pero may anghang din paminsan-minsan.

”Kinakabahan ka ba Cece?” tanong ni Mecky na siyang bahagyang ikinagulat ko.

Alam ko sa loob-loob ko, hindi na talaga ako mapakali, nasa jeep pa lang kami ni kuya Jared, namamawis na ang kili-kili ko. Mabuti na lang at absorbent ang polo shirt na suot ko.

”Huh? Hindi no,” I retracted. It sounded defensive kaya't napabiglang tingin sakin si Mecky.

I continued my defense. ”Nyee. Hindi nga. Ba't naman ako kakabahan? Hindi ako kinakabahan, ano ka ba.”

I tried to be less defensive, but obviously, I failed.

”Chill,” mahinahon niyang tugon. ”First day kasi diba. Parang we don't know what to expect. Tapos magiging teacher na naman natin pala si Mr. Severus.”

”Ok nga yun eh. At least hindi na tayo manghuhula kung anong klaseng teacher siya. Mas worried ako sa mga bagong teachers talaga at sa mga luma pero never pa natin naging teacher.”

Kumalma ako ng bahagya at mukhang dedma lang din naman si Mecky sa medyo exaggerated kong reaksyon. One thing I liked about Mecky, she never complicates things. She's, cool.

”Sir!” - ”Ayyyyy!” - ”Hi Teacher Kim!” - ”OH! EM! GEE!” - ”Omg, omg, omg!” - Teacher Kim, Hi!” - ”Good morning sir!” - ”Ay! Pak! Papa Kim!” - ”Papa Kim! I love you po!”

Hindi magkandamayaw ang tilian sa hallways. It was always like this during the first week of the new school year. Hindi maitago ang kilig ng mga estudyante sa mga katabing classrooms.

Padating na siya..

Hindi na din maitago ang excitement ng mga classmates kong babae at mga beki. At iyung mga lalaki naman, umaarteng kinikilig din sila at malokong nagsisitilian.

Bumilis naman ang tibok ng puso ko. Pilit akong nagpapanggap na hindi excited at parang normal lang ang lahat. Pero sa loob-loob ko, para akong kinakabahan, natatae at hindi mapakali.

Hinawi ko ang buhok ko at inipit sa kaliwa kong tenga. Tapos hinawi ko ulit, sinuklay ko ng mga daliri ko, tapos napagdesisyunan ko nang ipony-tail na agad na kadalasan sa tanghali ko pa ginagawa. Hindi na talaga ako mapakali.

”Good morning, class,” ang unang tatlong salita niya pagpasok ng classroom na paniguradong tatatak na sa memorya ko - Good morning, class.

Pagkalapag niya ng gamit niya sa kanyang lamesa, tumingin siya sa buong klase at sinserong ngumiti. ”Hello. I'm, uh, quite honored, to be the first to welcome you to the senior class.”

Ngumiti ulit siya - ngiting nakakatunaw.

”I'm.. quite sure, this will be an exciting two years ahead of you,” patuloy pa niya. His voice was deep but light; it had round vibrations; it's icy, pero may dalang kakaibang init sa katawan. His british accent was distinct and precise.

”Christ! Kah-yoh na-namahn. But I'm glad, you three took this acadamic track, eh?”

His attention was directed to the three familiar students in class. I remember, they were in Teacher Kim's 10th grade Math class. He, then, continued to take notice of his other former students, gave them nods and few other comments that I could care less. I was too busy admiring his magnificent Herculean beauty. I couldn't believe it, he was actually right in front of me.

Biglang nagtagpo ang mga mata namin. I froze and stopped breathing for like several seconds. Not quite certain if I saw it right, but his eyes lit up, like he saw something for the first time. Then he smiled, but it was a smile na parang ako lang ang nakakita.

Dinig na dinig ko sa klase ang mga pinipigilang kilig ng mga natutunaw sa mga ngiti ni Teacher Kim. Pero iba ang nararamdaman ko, higit pa sa kilig.

”I'm quite excited for this new batch of seniors. I see that we have several new comers here. I most certainly hope you'd enjoy our campus, and, uh, well, to the originals, be good.”

With his subtle humour, the girls in class, of course, gave their sweetest laugh.

He was aware. Alam niya ang epekto niya sa mga tao sa paligid niya. I have always noticed, he consistently tries to be as proper as possible. Kadalasan sir, mam, Mr o Ms o Mrs ang tawag sa mga teacher dito sa school, but he opted to be called Teacher Kim. Para daw verbal reminder sa lahat na he's a teacher and he wanted to be treated as such.

Pero as have been proven many times too, mahirap pigilan ang hindi magnasa sa kaniya. He commands lust. He is a walking sexual fantasy. Dapat modelo siya, o artista, o para sa akin, porn star. Pero teacher siya at siya nga'y nagtuturo sa mga sexually charged-new breed-rabid racing hormones-libidinous teenagers.

Tumayo at sumandal siya sa harap ng teacher's desk. Noon, hanggang sulyap lamang ako, but finally, I got to see him in his full glory. He was even way perfect than I used to imagine him.

I was in total awe of his strikingly angular face; his chiseled jaw, his Herculean cheekbones, his deep-set and steely eyes, his sweeping eyelashes, and his sensously sculpted nose na para bang isang obra maestro ni Michaelangelo - aquiline, elegant, and very Roman-esque - everything in his face was intimidatingly perfect. He was like a direct descendant of a Greek God or Superman.

Hindi dapat naging legal na hayaan may isang katulad niya na nagtuturo sa eskwelahan. He is a crime anyone would happily commit, a perfect but dangerously attractive role model and influence to teenagers. Odd. Perfectly mismatched. Makasalanan.

”So... I, uh, I supposed, introductions are still in order,” he continued. His thick brows arched in the most endearing way.

It felt like time slowed down. The way his head tilt or nod and the subtle movements of his hands, there was this elegant confidence in him, like he was humble but very sure of himself.

”I understand, you must have done this at every first day of your entire school life. But, to keep this long tradition going, I'd like everyone to introduce yourselves. I'd be happy to start, my name is Christopher Octavo Cawkwell-Kim. Mix bits of british, filipino, korean, and, I don't know what else. But, please, call me Teacher Kim. I know, I know, that sounds rather too kindergarten, but I prefer the obvious,” patuloy niya. Again, uttered with a hint of humor, so the class sweetly laughed.

He uttered few other jokes that made the class chuckle, giggle and laugh. But none of it registered to me, especially, when he started wetting his lips; I instantaneously dazed off, lost in my wonderland.

His lips was his most domineering feature - a dreamy, lusty, soft pink lips that glistens whenever he wets it. It's lush but masculine - thin, heart-curved upper lip but plump and full lower lip. It was appetizing.

Kakatitig ko sa mukha ni Teacher Kim, may kakaiba pero masarap na tensyon akong nararamdaman sa gitna ng aking dalawang hita. I wanted to touch myself again so badly. Hindi ko mapigilang ma-imagine naman 'yung paborito kong eksena sa porn kung saan si Teacher Kim ang male lead ko.

In that scene, I was playing with myself. My fingers softly fondled on my throbbing virginity. I was just intentionally teasing Teacher Kim but keeping him in a distance. Takam na takam lang siya. Like a hungry lion preying on a lamb. It was hot, he was freaking hot. He was vicious, predatory, and I knew for sure I will not be able to tease him for long, he would ravage me eventually.

Flipping out of my daydream, I came back in real time. Teacher Kim continued talking in front of the class, introducing more about himself, as if any of us didn't know already. Pero parang isang sensual music lang ang naririnig ko. His words were like whispers - careless, animalistic, arousing whispers.

Dazing off into my hornyland again, I hear the sound of him sniffing my vanilla-cinnamon scented pussy. He would hiss, like a snake, and then sniff me in for more, slowly but intense. I've always taken pride of how good I must smell, thanks to the feminine wash from Swiss Alps that my aunt bought me. I wished, one day, or soon enough, Teacher Kim will have a good sniff of me for real.

I was utterly lost in my imagination. I could feel his lips gently rubbing on the delicate inner face of my thigh; tapos ang dulo ng kanyang mga daliri ay masarap na kumikiliti sa aking hiwa; and his tongue - I can't even comprehend the feeling - his tongue was busy doing the greatest work of art and my sweet little pussy was his canvas. I knew my dirty train of thoughts was moving too fast, I could hardly even catch my breath.

”Uy. Cece, ikaw na! Introduction mo.”

Makailang beses ako kinalabit ni Mecky bago ako nakabalik sa wisyo. May ilan pang nagtawanan sa paligid.

I was flustered, flushed even, and my throat dried up like summer. Naramdaman ko ang pamumutla ko at nakaramdam ako ng makapanindig-balahibong hiya sa itinakbo ng isip ko.

”Ha. Uh. Yes. Hi.”

Napatayo na lang ako bigla, hindi ko alam ang sasabihin ko. To make it worst, my eyes locked with Teacher Kim again. I suddenly felt naked. Something cold blasted into my skin.

Not quite sure with what I saw again, but his eyes scanned my body, which, strangely, it made me feel, proudly naked.

I wanted him. I wanted him to own me, use me, abuse me. I wanted him to treat me like a lamb, not a princess, not the good daughter, and definitely not the naive teenager that everybody think I am.

”Nice one, Cece! Hindi ka masyadong halata!” hiyaw ng isa kong classmate at nagtawan ang lahat.

In a flash, I felt naked na din sa harapan ng buong klase. A sudden breeze of freezing cold air brushed on my nape. I burped silently and swallowed dry.

”I noticed.. we are both Kims. We might be related, eh?” tanong ni Teacher Kim. Nakakunot-noo niya at nagsalubong ang mga kilay niya. His face. That face. I felt my nipples pressed against my bra. The sensual spots in my body became extra sensitive.

I realised, he knew me! He knows I'm Cece Kim! But then, I quickly snapped out of the thought. Of course, he knew me. Four generations of Kims graduated in this school; my grandparents and great grandparents graduated from this university, my parents started their scandalous love affair in the high school cafeteria, and my brothers have been a regular in the Disciplinary Office. I was the only decent Kim who had set foot in this school and haven't been in any scandal.

”Uhm. Ahhh. uhm,” napalunok-laway ako. ”Nn-no sir. I'm pure filipino po. The Kim line in my family are all born and raised here in the Philippines. I never knew how we got Kim as a surname tho.”

Napakunot noo ako, it was as if I was talking randomly, parang sarili ko lang kinakausap ko. Madalas mangyari sa'kin 'to, 'yung parang nauuna ang bibig ko sa takbo ng utak ko.

”That's uh... quite a good start for an introduction. I would like to hear more of you.”

More. Of. Me?!

I tried to gain back my consciousness. Nakaka-ilang na rin ang mga tingin sa'kin ng mga kaklase ko, 'yung iba, hindi ko pa nga kilala.

”Err, Frey Uriella Cecelia Kim-Menendez, Cece for short, ss-sir,” napalagok ulit ako ng isang tipon ng laway. ”And uh..er, ahmmm ---”

”Why did you choose STEM as your academic track?” pagdugtong ni Teacher Kim, he sounded a little impatient.

Umalis siya sa pagkakasandal niya sa harap ng desk niya, tumungo sa likod nito at umupo. Parang naiirita siya sa pagkalutang ko, o masyado akong obvious sa pagnanasa sa kaniya. Hindi ko na alam.

”I want to be a research scientist sir. I, uh, someday, I want to develop and create solutions to some of the major scientific inconsistencies, or maybe find cures to diseases. I also wanted to understand the mathematical truth to the creation of the great pyramids of Giza. I think everything we know now about the pyramids aren't completely congruent and only few facts are substantial. I am deeply fascinated with the mathematical knowledge, discovery and mystery of the ancient world. I, uh, consider myself, a very curious person, sir. I thought, taking STEM would be the right first step to do so.”

Nagpalakpakan ang mga classmates ko. Humiyaw pa ng cheer si ate Juris. Hindi ko rin alam kung saan ko biglang nahugot ang sagot ko dahil ang tanging rason ko lang naman ay para maging teacher kita, Teacher Kim.

Hindi ko mawari kung naiinis nga siya. It was subtle, but I noticed, he clenched his fist at nagseryoso ang mukha niya.

”Very well, Cece. Hold on to that, I am sure you are capable of many great things.. Cece.”

Inurong niya papalapit sa desk niya ang upuan niya at pinisil ng kaliwa niyang kamay ang kanyang kanang braso, tapos ay minasahe niya ang kanyang leeg.

Nang matapos ang lahat sa mga introductions, tumayo muli si Teacher Kim para magsulat sa board.

And oh! That perfect ass!

It was the longest 90 minutes in the history of time. I was faintly quiet after that painful first impression. He was making jokes, nakikipagsabayan din siya sa mga double meaning na reactions at comments ng mga kaklase ko. But he remained proper and decent, the hottest respectable teacher ever existed.

Napansin kong he was avoiding to direct his gaze sa area ng kinauupuan ko. I was probably terribly awkward in that unintentional tensions during my introduction. Dama ko rin na may mga matang sumusulyap-sulyap sa akin mula sa mga classmates ko.

I've never been out of control. I was almost always flawlessly proper, honest, polite and innocent.

Did I just outed myself?

I started to worry if I just revealed clues to my secret. Surely, hindi lang ako ang nanonood ng porn sa classroom na ito or nagnanasa kay Teacher Kim. But I'm Cece, I was supposed to be naive and incapable of having dirty thoughts. I got worried, baka unti-unti nang ma-reveal ang mga itinatago-tago kong katotohanan.

The first bell rang. I felt a sudden jolt of freedom. Makakahinga na din ako ng normal.

Bago lumabas si Teacher Kim ng classrom, tumingin siya sa akin. Finally. Isang malaman na tingin, pero hindi ko mawari ang ibig sabihin. It was a deep, penetrating stare. But then, he cut it, stared at the floor briefly and continued collecting his things, wet his lips again, just as he did 69 times the entire class period. Oh yes, I counted it because everytime he did so, I felt an internal explosion of pleasure.

While collecting his things back into his leather briefcase, he let out a smile. It was subtle, indirect. But I felt it was meant for me. It went straight to the unexplored depth of my virginity. It was a spiking, tingling pain of pleasure.

It was somewhat mischievous tho, and was kindda familiar too, it was how I imagined him smiling in my pornographic fantasy. And just right before he head out the door, he gave me one last look. He was evil.