Part 32 (1/2)
Because they are always on cord (encored).
What is the difference between a widow and a window? Little if N-y; for the trans-parents griefs of the one, like the panes of the other, are removed in course of re-pairing; and the latter is for mankind to look out of, while the former looks out for mankind.
When may a loaf of bread be said to be inhabited? When it has a little Indian in it.
What part of a fish weighs most? The scales.
What is that which works when it plays and plays when it works? A fountain.
Why is divinity the easiest of the three learned professions? Because it is easier to preach than to practice.
Why are sailors bad hors.e.m.e.n? Because they ride on the main (mane).
Why is a sword belt like a cow upon a common? Because it goes round the waste (waist).
Why is a thief like a knocker? Because they are tied up to prevent disturbance.
What's the difference between a bee and a donkey? One gets all the honey, and the other all the whacks (wax).
Why is sealing wax like a rifleman? Because it's often under arms.
Why are cripples and beggars similar to shepherds and fishermen?
Because they live by hook and by crook.
What is that which has four legs and flies in the air? Two canary birds.
What is the only pain of which every one makes light? A window pane.
Why is a smith a dangerous companion? Because he deals in forgery.
Why are coals like poor laboring men? Because they feed the great.
Why is an honest friend like orange chips? Because he's candid.
Why is a peach-stone like a regiment? Because it has a colonel (kernel).
Why is a playhouse like a punch bowl? Because it is best when full.
What is the princ.i.p.al part of a horse? The mane (main) part.
Why is a candle like an atheist? Because it's wicked.
Why is a dog like a tree? Because they both produce a bark.
What barrel is best fitted for a soldier's helmet? A cask (casque).
Why is it no offense to conspire in the evening? What is treasonable is reasonable after _t_.
Why is a corpse like a man with a cold? Because he is in a-coughing.
Why is a fiddler like a man in amaze? Because he's at a stand.