Part 21 (2/2)

She started to move back, but he grabbed her arm and held her in place. Gently he touched her chin until she was looking at him. ”I'm sorry, Andie. I was out of line. Please forgive me.”

”All right.”

He smiled. ”As easily as that?”

”I don't have time to hold a grudge. I'll be gone soon, and then I'll never see you again. Spending these last few hours being angry at each other seems like a waste of the time we have left.”

Especially when they could be making love.

The thought came from nowhere, but once it lodged in his brain, he didn't want to let it go. His arousal was instant. Blood raced through him, heating by the second, bubbling with need and intensity. He remembered the feel of her next to him, under him. Her sweetness surrounded him. His gaze was drawn to her mouth.

She didn't notice. She stared at her hands resting on her lap. ”I want to convince you not to go through with it. Because when you sell your soul to the devil, you can't get it back.”

He leaned against the swing. ”I don't have any more explanations for you. I have to do this. I know you don't understand. h.e.l.l, half the time I don't understand, either. But my decision is made. This is who I am. A couple of days ago you said I'd seen the worst part of you. Now you've seen the worst part of me. I'm a killer, just like Kray. I know that, but I'm still going to do it.”

She flung herself at him. ”I don't want you to die.”

It was a cry from her soul. He wrapped his arms around her and held her close. ”I'll do my best to survive.”

”Don't make a joke of it.”

”I'm not,” he whispered, stroking her hair. ”I swear I'll try to get out of here.”

Her breath was hot against his s.h.i.+rt, her tears damp. ”But if you-”

”Shh. No more words, Andie. Not tonight. I can't say what you want to hear and you can't convince me. You're right. There's not much time left. Tomorrow you'll be gone.”

”Hold me,” she said softly. ”Hold me.”

He pulled her onto his lap. She snuggled close. Her cheek rested on his shoulder. He could feel her warmth and the faint beating of her heat. Her hip pressed against his arousal. He thought she didn't notice. Finally she s.h.i.+fted slightly and looked up at him.

He read the questions in her eyes.

”I want you,” he said simply.

He expected some kind of response. Maybe agreement or a quick slap on the face. He hadn't expected her to duck her head in shame. ”Are you sure?”

”I'm a complete b.a.s.t.a.r.d.” He slid his hands up her arms to cup her face. When she tried to turn away, he held her still. Their eyes met. ”I'm sorry. I know you said you forgave me and all that, but I want you to know I mean it. I never wanted to hurt you. I was reacting to my own feelings about Kray. I don't think you're a wh.o.r.e. You're right. I wasn't thinking about you, I was using you, but it wasn't on purpose. I didn't set out to be a jerk. It just sort of happened.”

”I didn't set out to marry an evil man.”

”I know he deceived you. I know it wasn't your fault. I know you left as soon as you found out the truth.”

Andie stared at him. She wanted to believe him. She'd been waiting six years to have someone say those words to her. To hear them from Jeff was more than she'd ever hoped for. She knew she was a fool when it came to him. Probably she should hate him for what he'd done. The problem was she understood what he was thinking. If the situations had been reversed, she would have been just as angry at him for being alive. She would have a.s.sumed the worst about him.

His eyes were dark in the night, a deep midnight blue. He was close enough that she could feel his warm breath on her face.

”I'm sorry,” he said, as he stroked her face. ”If I could take the words back, I would.”

She felt his pain for her, and it was enough. Without thinking about what she was doing, she leaned forward and kissed him. Her brief touch was meant to comfort and offer atonement. Instead, at the first brush of his lips, her body began to tingle. She became aware of their position, of the fact that she was on his lap and he was already aroused. Her hands rested on his chest, her bare thighs touched his. They were both hungry for love.

”Come with me,” he said.

She slipped off his lap and stood up. He rose and took her hand. Together they walked into the house and toward his bedroom. At the door she hesitated. She didn't want a repeat of what had happened before.

Jeff understood. She supposed that was one of the things she liked best about him he often read her mind.

”There's just the two of us,” he said, stepping into the bedroom. ”No one else. I promise.”

She trusted his promises, just as she trusted him. She followed him inside,then closed the door. She couldn't imagine leaving this place without being with him one more time. She wanted to love him with her body, to silently speak the words she wasn't sure she had the courage to say aloud.

He bent over and clicked on the light beside the bed, then stood in front of her. He was tall. She had to tilt her head back to look at his face. She liked the way the shadows and hollows of his face made him dangerously handsome. She liked the way her heart beat faster when he was close to her.

He reached out and touched her hair. ”You're so beautiful, Andie. I know what you look like, but every time I see you, your beauty takes my breath away.”

She knew her nose was a little small and her mouth uneven, with a fuller bottom lip. Her eyes were okay, but she didn't have great cheekbones. She'd spent a couple of years as a model and was intimately familiar with her physical faults. Yet Jeff didn't notice. She could point them out to him and he would simply shake his head in amazement and tell her she was crazy. What did any of that matter?

He was right, she acknowledged. It didn't matter. As long as he thought she was attractive, she didn't care about the rest of the world.

He slipped his fingers through her hair. She reached forward and began to unb.u.t.ton his s.h.i.+rt. When she was done, she pushed the material aside and pressed her lips to his bare chest.

He tasted of man and the sea. She could smell the scent of tropical suns.h.i.+ne, of the sand and the wind. He was hot against her lips. Sheflickered her tongue against the golden hairs angling down his chest toward his belly. They tickled her mouth. He caught his breath, then twisted her hair around his hand and held her head in place.

She smiled against him. She had no plans to move away. She wanted to touch him, taste him, everywhere. She wanted to be close to him.

She wrapped her arms around his waist and moved her mouth to his collarbone. She licked the length,then slipped lower to his flat nipple. She nibbled at the slight crest, circling until she felt the shudder that raced through him.

The night was still, the air sultry. The heat between them grew and intensified. He released her hair and grabbed her shoulders. She looked up. He face was taut with antic.i.p.ation and pleasure. He wanted her. His arousal pressed against her belly.

As he bent down toward her, she reached around and cupped his rear. The muscles there flexed against her hands. Her palms hugged the fullest part of the curve, her fingers squeezed. Then his mouth found hers.

Hunger swept over her as his lips searched hers, touching everywhere, seeking her sweetness. She opened for him. He teased her by not entering. Instead, his tongue traced her lips, over and over again. He licked the tiny corners,then wors.h.i.+ped the soft inner skin. She squirmed against him, wanting more, needing more.

Desire, fueled by the danger, by the fear that their world was about to explode, filled every part of her body. Her thighs trembled, her b.r.e.a.s.t.s ached,her chest was tight as if she couldn't catch her breath.

She angled her head,then in desperation thrust her tongue into his mouth. They touched, tip to tip. Excitement raced through her. Jeff laughed low in his throat,then retreated, as if expecting her to follow.

She did. She tasted his moistness, his heat. She reveled in the clenching of his muscles. She moved her hands up his back, under his s.h.i.+rt. Warm skin met hers. He was strong and broad. A man. Hard to her soft, but matching her tenderness with his own.

It wasn't just about the s.e.x, she thought as he began to tug on the hem of her tank top. It was specifically about him, about the feelings she had for him. She needed him, she cared about him. She loved him.

Love. Her eyes opened. She raised her head as he pulled up the tank top. The material slid up her torso, then over her head and down her arms. He fingered the strap of her bra.

”I would have pictured you in satin, but the cotton looks just right,” he said.

She smiled. ”I'm not really a satin sort of person.”

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