Part 11 (2/2)

Okay so maybe I've been avoiding looking in her direction since I sat down. Clearly, she hasn't missed this fact.

”Hey.” I smile, trying to act completely casual.

I don't know why I feel so weird.

”You want a drink?” Gavin leans in on my other side, speaking directly into my ear.

”Please.” I turn my face inward. ”Preferably something with liquor.”

He laughs, kissing my temple before pus.h.i.+ng into a stand.

”I'll come with you.” Decklan immediately stands as well, winking at Kimber before following Gavin toward the bar.

Kimber doesn't even wait until the men are out of earshot before pouncing.

”Spill,” she demands, narrowing her eyes on me.

”Spill what?” I try to play it off like this isn't a big deal at all, though deep down I know it's a much bigger deal than even I'm ready to admit.

”How long has this been going on?” She gestures toward the guys who are now standing at the bar.

”It just started. I mean, kind of.” I let out a nervous laugh. ”I don't even know what this is,” I admit.

”So you guys are like a thing now?” It's more of a statement than a question, but I choose to answer it like one.

”I guess so.” I shrug, not really sure how to label it.

”So I take it you broke things off with Bryan. He must have been heartbroken. You know how much he liked you,” she says, her eyes widening when she catches the expression on my face. ”No?” She shakes her head.

”I haven't had a chance to. This whole thing happened so fast.”

”Harlee, you can't do that. You have to tell him, like now.”

”I know. I just...”

”You just what?” She eyes me curiously.

”What if breaking things off with him isn't the right choice?” I ask hesitantly, fearing the judgment from her I'm sure is soon to come.

I realize how awful of a person this makes me. I'm not stupid enough to believe that my actions here won't have consequences. I'm just not sure I'm ready to face them just yet.

”You can't be serious?” She looks at me like I've got five heads. ”From the moment you and Gavin hooked up after Halloween, he's all you talked about.”

”Until Bryan,” I remind her.

”Even still,” she continues like I didn't just interrupt her, ”you started dating Bryan because you thought you knew what you were going to get with Gavin. You can't tell me that's still the case. Because if so, then what the h.e.l.l have you been doing at his condo all weekend?”

”We hooked up that night after dinner. The night you saw us kissing,” I admit, knowing in order to make her understand I'm going to have to tell her everything. ”I didn't plan for it to happen, nor did I really want it to. It's just when that man touches me; I swear to G.o.d, girl, my mind turns to mush.”

”Trust me, mush I understand.” She reaches out and pats my hand rea.s.suringly.

”So we hooked up and while in the moment it was incredible, I immediately regretted it afterward. I knew how wrong it was, especially because of Bryan. I promised myself right then and there that it wouldn't happen again.”

”How is that going for you?” she asks sarcastically, clearly just trying to lighten the situation, which I appreciate.

”Pretty obvious I think.” I roll my eyes and let out a frustrated sigh.

”So how did you end up at his place?” She pushes me to continue.

”I went there Friday afternoon to end things. I knew I needed to do it face to face or he would likely just show up, and I didn't want to risk Bryan finding us together. I had every intention of telling him that what happened Thursday night could never happen again, but then he looked at me with those d.a.m.n blue eyes and crooked smile and it all flew out the window.”

”I understand that feeling. I know what it's like to be so completely consumed by a man that you can't see five feet past him. That still doesn't change that what you're doing is wrong,” she reminds me.

”I know, he texted me yesterday. Bryan,” I add. ”I lied. I told him I was spending the weekend in Portland with you.” I give her an apologetic look, hating that I dragged her into my lie.

”He never questioned it,” I continue. ”Not even for a second. Oh G.o.d, I really am the worst person in the world.” I drop my head into my hands.

”No, you're not. You're human. You just need to make a decision and stick with it. It's not fair for you to drag two men behind you while you decide which one you want to be with.”

”I want Gavin,” I admit. ”But I'm scared. What if he turns out to be exactly the person I thought he was all along and I lose Bryan over it? I don't know what to do.”

”Go with your heart.” Kimber takes my hand in hers and gives it a light squeeze. ”When I questioned my ability to be with Decklan, when I worried that he would hurt me, you were the one who pushed me to conquer that fear. You convinced me that if I felt as deeply for Decklan as I claimed that I would never forgive myself for just giving up and walking away. And you know what? You were right. The only thing I would ever regret would be not fighting for what he and I have.” She gives me a small smile.

”Look,” she continues. ”There are no guarantees in this life. Things might work out, they might not, but can you just walk away without finding out for yourself?”

”I think I'm in love with him,” I admit, flipping my eyes to the bar where Decklan and Gavin appear to be in just as deep of a conversation.

”I know you are.” She smiles, releasing my hand. ”I knew it the moment I saw you two kissing at the restaurant that there was something brewing between you two. My suspicions were confirmed tonight when I saw the way he was looking at you. I'd say you're not alone in those feelings.”

”Really?” I don't know why her statement surprises me but it does.

”I've been around Gavin long enough to know he doesn't really do the girlfriend thing. You are the only girl I've ever seen him come into the bar with. Usually, he just leaves with them and even then it's always random girls that I never see again. It's different this time. I can see it. It's not just Bryan's heart on the line anymore.”

”What do I do?” I ask, ignoring the jealousy that creeps in at the mention of Gavin with other women.

”I can't tell you that. What I can tell you is that the longer you wait to break things off with Bryan, or Gavin- whichever you choose- the harder and messier it's going to be. My advice: make a choice now and stick with it.”

I open my mouth to say more but then close it again when Kimber gestures behind me. I turn just in time to see Gavin slide in next to me, a bright pink drink garnished with pineapple and a cherry in one hand, his usual beer in the other.

”s.e.x on the Beach.” He sets the drink in front of me before reclaiming his seat.

I immediately take a long drink, the cold, fruity liquid mildly soothing the uneasiness that has settled in my chest.

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