Part 14 (2/2)

But twenty-two--it's a lifetime, a whole lifetiot seventeen years He celled next to hway robber, he was so small and puny He must be here now A fool, to think he could live here seventeen years In this hell--what an io They sent hih ti? He will soon die here, anyway; it would be better to suicide A strong h; perhaps a very strong ht _I_ couldn't; no, I know I couldn't; perhaps two or three years, at most We had often spoken about this, the Girl, Fedya, and I I had then such a peculiar idea of prison: I thought I would be sitting on the floor in a gruesome, black hole, with my hands and feet chained to the wall; and the worms would crawl over me, and slowly devour my face and my eyes, and I so helpless, chained to the wall The Girl and Fedya had a siht bear prison life a feeeks I could for a year, I thought; but was doubtful I picturedthe wor to eat all ot to my heart; that would be fatal And the vers, they ry Perhaps there are woreon: there is a wound on my foot I don't kno it happened

I was unconscious in that dark hole--it was just like my old idea of prison I couldn't live even a week there: it's awful Here it is a little better; but it's never light in this cell,--always in semidarkness And so small and narrow; no s; it's damp, and smells so foully all the time The walls are wet and cla Not much better than that black hole, with my hands and arms chained to the wall Just a trifle better,--my hands are not chained Perhaps I could live here a few years: no more than three, or may be five But these brutal officers!

No, no, I couldn't stand it I want to die! I'd die here soon, anyway; they will kill ive the enemy the satisfaction; they shall not be able to say that they are torturing me in prison, or that they killed me No! I'd rather kill myself Yes, kill ainst the bars--no, not now! At night, when it's all dark,--they couldn't save me then It will be a terrible death, but it must be done If I only knew about ”them” in New York--the Girl and Fedya--it would be easier to die then What are they doing in the case? Are theyto hear of

Perhaps they wonder why I didn't suicide right after the trial But I could not I thought I should be taken from the court to my cell in jail; sentenced prisoners usually are I had prepared to hangThey brought me directly here from the courtroo lady

[12] Mister

[13] Lady

”Supper! Want coffee? Hold your tin!” the trusty shouts into the door

Suddenly he whispers, ”Grab it, quick!” A long, dark object is shot between the bars into the cell, dropping at the foot of the bed The htly wrapped in brown paper What can it be? The outside cover protects two layers of old newspaper; then a white object co round and hard inside--it's a cake of soap A sense of thankfulness steals into ood to know that there is at least one being here with a friendly spirit Perhaps it's sos? Are they permitted? The towel feels nice and soft; it is a relief fro is so hard and coarse here--the language, the guards I pass the towel over ht to wash up--ot here When did I come? Let me see; what is to-day? I don't know, I can't think But my trial--it was on Monday, the nineteenth of Septeht uard--he frightened ht? No, it er than that Have I been here only since yesterday?

Why, it see time! Can this be Tuesday, only Tuesday? I'll ask the trusty the next time he passes I'll find out who sent this towel too Perhaps I could get some cold water frorowing accustomed to the semi-darkness of the cell I discern objects quite clearly There is a small wooden table and an old chair; in the furthest corner, almost hidden by the bed, is the privy; near it, in the center of the wall opposite the door, is a water spigot over a narrow, circular basin The water is lukewar The rub-doith the towel is invigorating The stile

Suddenly a sharp sting, as of a needle, pricks my face There's a pin in the towel As I draw it out, so white flutters to the floor A note!

With ear alert for a passing step, I hastily read the penciled writing:

Be shure to tare this up as soon as you reade it, it's fro, we know you are on the level Lay low and keep your laht, watch the screws and the stools they is worse than bulls

Du, will see you tomorrow A true friend

I read the note carefully, repeatedly The peculiar language baffles : evidently an escape is being planned My heart beats violently, as I contemplate the possibilities If I could escape Oh, I should not have to die! Why haven't I thought of it before? What a glorious thing it would be! Of course, they would ransack the country for me I should have to hide But what does it matter? I'd be at liberty And what treanda: people would become much interested, and I--why, I should have new opportunities--

The shadow of suspicion falls overme with despair Perhaps a trap! I don't knorote the note A fine conspirator I'd prove, to be duped so easily But why should they want to trap uard? What purpose could it serve? But they are so mean, so brutal That tall officer--the Deputy called his--he seems to have taken a bitter dislike to et e?

These things happen--they have been done in Russia And he looks like a _provocateur_, the scoundrel No, he won't get ain It contains so many expressions I don't understand I should ”keep my lamps lit” What laet them? And what ”screws” must I watch? And the ”stools,”--I have only a chair here Why should I watch it? Perhaps it's to be used as a weapon No, itelse The note says he will call to-morrow I'll be able to tell by his looks whether he can be trusted Yes, yes, that will be best I'll wait till to-morrow Oh, I wish it were here!

CHAPTER II

THE WILL TO LIVE

I

The days drag interulatesed by the note of thefor his appearance,--yet the suggestion of escape has ger to assert itself, growing o by I wonder that my mind dwells upon suicide ht of self-destruction fills me with dismay Every possibility of escape must first be exhausted, I reassure my troubled conscience

Surely I have no fear of death--when the proper tihly imprudent; worse, quite unnecessary Indeed, it is my duty as a revolutionist to seize every opportunity for propaganda: escape would afford htless on my part to condeivable delay in co the impossible sentence of seventeen years Indeed, I was unjust: Ja his plans It takes ti: one et one's bearings in the prison So far I have had but little chance to do so Evidently, it is the policy of the authorities to keep norance of the intricate systees At liberty to leave this place, it would prove difficult for ic ring I dreaht! It was a wonderful talisman, secreted--I fancied in the dream--by the Goddess of the Social Revolution I saw her quite distinctly: tall and co love in her eyes She stood atthe queenly countenance, her ar toward the dark wall Eagerly I looked in the direction of the arched hand--there, in a crevice, soloith the brilliancy of fresh dew in thecleft in the centre Its scintillating rays glorified the dark corner with the aureole of a great hope I into a close-fitting whole, when, lo! the rays burst into a fire that spread and instantly melted the iron and steel, and dissolved the prison walls, disclosing to reen fields and woods, and men and women playfully at work in the sunshi+ne of freedo dispelled the vision

Oh, if I had that ic heart now! To escape, to be free! May be my unknown friend will yet keep his word He is probably perfecting plans, or perhaps it is not safe for him to visit me If my comrades could aid me, escape would be feasible But the Girl and Fedya will never consider the possibility No doubt they refrain fro because they ht the poor Girl must be! Yet she should have written: it is now four days since my removal to the penitentiary Every day I anxiously await the co of the Chaplain, who distributes the mail--There he is! The quick, nervous step has become fanize the vigorous sla lock The short steps patter on the bridge connecting the upper rotunda with the cell-house, and pass along the gallery The solitary footfall a a graveyard at night Now the Chaplain pauses: he is co outside the cell with that on the letter

Some one has rerow faint, as the postman rounds the distant corner He passes the cell-row on the opposite side, ascends the top my cell My heart beats faster as the sound approaches: therethe cell--he pauses I can't see hi numbers Perhaps the letter is for e K, Cell 6, Nuht flaps on the floor of the next cell, and the quick, short step has passed me by No mail for me! Another twenty-four hours must elapse before I may receive a letter, and then, too, perhaps the faint shadoill not pause at ht ofme desperate I would make use of any ain liberty Liberty! What would it not offer reatest opportunity for revolutionary activity I would choose Russia The Mostianer have forsaken me I will keep aloof, but they shall learn what a true revolutionist is capable of acco If there is a spark of manhood in them, they will blush for their despicable attitude toward er they will then be to prove their confidence by exaggerated devotion, to salve their guilty conscience! I should not have to complain of a lack of financial aid, were I to infor future activity in Russia It would be glorious, glorious! S--sh--