Part 26 (1/2)
”'Yis, but ours is a particular hard case intirely. I am dilicate meself. I know I don't look so, but I am; and yees ought ter interpose to help a poor countryman of yees own in trouble.'
”By this time Mackay was half frozen and thoroughly out of patience. In his quick, sharp way he said: 'Madam, we cannot give all the men in the country employment.'
”The mask of the woman was off in an instant. With a scorn and hate unutterable she burst forth in almost a scrame.
”'Oh, yees can't. Oh, no! Yees forgits fen yees was poor your ownsilf, ye blackguard. Refusin' a poor man work, and shakin the mountains and churnin' the ocean avery day wid your siven and eight dollar missages.
Yees can't employ all the min in the counthry. Don't yees own the whole counthry? And do yees think we'd apply to yees at all if we could find a dacant mon in the worreld? May the divil fly away wid yees, and whin he does yees may tell him for me if he gives a short bit for yer soul he'll chate himself worse nor he's been chated since he bargained with Judas Iscariot. Thake that, sur, wid me compliments, yees purse-proud parvenu.'
”When the woman began to rave, Mackay walked rapidly away, but she niver relaxed the scrame of her tirade until Mackay disappeared from sight.
Thin she paused for a moment, thin to herself she muttered, 'But I got aven wid him oneway.' She thin turned and walked away toward her cabin.
”It was a case where money was no a.s.sistance to a man.”
”There is a good deal of humor displayed in courts of justice at times, is there not, Colonel?” asked Wright.
”Oh, yes,” was the reply. ”Anyone would think so who ever heard old Frank Dunn explain to a court that the reason of his being late was because he had no watch, and deploring meanwhile his inability to purchase a watch because of the mult.i.tude of unaccountable fines which His Honor had seen proper, from time to time, to impose upon him.”
”In that first winter in Eureka,” said Wright, ”I strolled into court one day when a trial was in progress.
”Judge D---- was managing one side and a volunteer lawyer the other. The volunteer lawyer had the best side, and to confuse the court, Judge D----, in his argument, misquoted the testimony somewhat. His opponent interrupted and repeated exactly what the witness had testified to.
”Turning to his opponent, Judge D----, with a sneer, said:
”'I see, sir, you are very much interested in the result of this case.'
”'Oh, no,' was the response. 'I am doing this for pure love. I do not make a cent in this case.'
”Then Judge D----, with still more bitterness, said:
”'That is like you. You try cases for nothing and cheat _good_ lawyers out of their fees.'
”With a look of unfeigned astonishment the other lawyer said:
”'Well, what are _you_ angry about? How does that interfere with _you_?'”
Here Brewster, who had been reading, laid down his book and said:
”I heard of a case as I came through Salt Lake City some years ago, which, if not particularly humorous, revealed wonderful presence of mind on the part of the presiding judge. It may be the story is not true, but it was told in Salt Lake City as one very liable to be true.
”A miner, who had been working a placer claim in the hills all summer--so the story ran--and who had been his own cook, barber, chambermaid and tailor, came down to Salt Lake City to see the sights and purchase supplies. He had dough in his whiskers, grease upon his overalls, pine twigs in his hair, and altogether did not present the appearance of a dancing master or a millionaire. Hardly had he reached the city when he thought it necessary to take something in order to 'brace up.' One drink gave him courage to take another, and in forty minutes he was dead drunk on the sidewalk.
”The police picked him up and tossed him into a cell in the jail, disdaining to search him, so abject seemed his condition.
”Next morning he was brought before the Police Judge and the charge of D. D. was preferred against him.
”'You are fined ten dollars, sir,' was the brief sentence of the Court.
The man unb.u.t.toned two pairs of overalls and from some inner recess of his garments produced a roll of greenbacks as big as a man's fist. It was a trying moment for the Judge, but his presence of mind did not fail him. He raised up from his seat, leaned one elbow on his desk and, as if in continuation of what he had already said, thundered out: 'And one hundred dollars for contempt of court.'
”The man paid the one hundred and ten dollars and hastily left the court and the city.”