89 Its raining frats and dogs (1/2)
Even all the hot sauce he poured on the chicken kebab he just ate couldnt wash away the bad taste in his mouth. What the hell?!? There was nothing on the news about this!
Ben knew what this would mean for his evening. Rain this early was a nightlife killer, making people stay home, which would close his window of opportunity. Is this karmic revenge for Katie? Damn cloud jizz
Now Ben would have to trudge through the rain to return to his dorm in order to get his umbrella and change his wet clothes. The worst part was there wasnt anything he could do. Despite the pessimistic circ.u.mstances, he didnt have a choice but to go out and try his luck at bars. It didnt matter that his chances were terrible because Zeus was dropping loads
Thinking about it further, Ben became angry, but he had no way to get his revenge on the culpritStormbecause he didnt have Halle Berrys address
So he could only curse at her mouthpiece. He pointed at the sky and screamed, ”Goddamn you weatherman! I curse you!!!”
…
”Get out my shop, you crazy!” A Middle Eastern man with an apron yelled at Ben from behind a counter.
Ben ignored it. He was attempting to come up with ideas to salvage the night, but was shooting blanks
With no better alternative, he trekked through the rainfall, starting his journey to search for women at the local bars.
***
On the other side of town, an obese weatherman was in an upper-class restaurant dining on a steak dinner. It was a well-deserved reward for his recent hard work. Classical music produced the perfect ambiance to compliment the succulent tenderloin rolling around his mouth. Then, out of nowhere, he sneezed
His male friend across the table watched a random anime 20 years ago…so he knew what this meant, and chuckled. ”Someone must be talking about you”
…
The friend blinked at the lack of response. ”Rick?”
Suddenly, the weatherman shot up from his chair and grabbed his own throat with both hands. His mouth opened as if he was trying to scream, but only a twisted gurgle escaped. ”ECCHHH! ACCHHH!”
…
The weathermans face turned purple! He was choking to death!
Everyone nearby gasped in shock! Noone responded except a quick-thinking waiter who ran up and gave him the Heimlich!
A piece of meat flew out of the weathermans mouthsaving his life
He almost died to the Japanese sneezing curse!
Everyone breathed a sigh of relief, the weatherman included, who held his chest to calm down. He looked at his friend across the table. ”Dear god, I almost died. Scott, did you see that?”
Scott didnt answer, because he was standing up holding his throat. ”ECCHHH! ACCHHH!”
…
His face turned purple! He was choking to death!
Luckily, the waiter was already experienced!
He saved the day once again…
Scott almost died to the Heimlich food-spitting curse!
It was fortunate there wasnt a third choking incident, but the conditions werent right. Noone gasped in shock this time because theyd seen the weatherman choking already…and they were tired of this trope…
***
A few hours later