28 Time-Travel (1/2)

The 10-feet skeleton in front of us looks down at us and says, ”Are you ready to have a blast to the past?”

Well, even if she's ripped-off from Future's Diary's Dues, she isn't even half as tall as him. That's a good thing though. I don't want a baby Triceratops to suddenly become a freaking T-Rex. I mean, aside from the fact that that would be far more terrifying, it's just plain weird to see my favorite herbivore becoming my favorite carnivore. By the way, why am I talking about dinosaurs again?

”Done monologuing?” she asks with a bored face which she somehow carried on from her human form to … Bones.

”Don't look at me like I'm the only one who is wasting time here.” Aside from the fact that I never wasted a single second, ”You are the one who needs to explain things better.”

”Huh!?” she looks at me in surprise. What!? Did she seriously meant to throw me in past with that explanation.

”Explain which time-period, which place we are to go and what the big eff do we need to do there?” I ask angrily.

”Hah!” she sighs and comes off the stage, and then uses it as a place to sit. Well, now I know why there is 4 feet tall stage there. But anyway, she then says, ”First of all, don't eff anyone there? That's just plain weird.”

Seriously? That's how your explanation starts?

”I mean, just think about it, those people would be, like, your great, great, great grandmas …” can we stop talking about that? ”Or grandpas.”

Now we seriously need to stop talking about that or I'm gonna puke. And no one, not even the author of Re:Zero, let's their main character puke; because that is absolutely disgusting.

”Now, if you haven't already gotten an idea from that, you'll need to go back to 1850s. To be more precise, 1856.” She says in her a-little-less-bored-than-before voice.

1856? Well, that's pretty far back and … doesn't really make much sense to me.

”Why 1856? From what I know, Roswaisa was less than 100 years old. So, why do we need to go back … (Wait! Wait! Let the author count how much it is) … uh, 164 years?”

”You'll know when …”

”Don't give me that cliché, bitch!” I shout angrily and find that the moment I do so, something like the hand of a really big skeleton passes from a little distance to me with a speed of mach 1. What's even more dangerous and frightening than that is … the place that it passed from and would have hit if the aim was a little higher. That place … yeah, if you know what I mean, thank you! If you don't know what I mean, very, very thank you!

”Now,” bringing her hand back to where it originally was (on her lap), Dues continues in the same tone as before, ”The place that you need to go to is … (Wait! Wait! Let the author think of something good) … uh, India.”

India? What was the point of even trying to think, author-san, when there's only one country you have ever seen with your own eyes?

”I see. That's a good place to be. I always wanted to visit India.” Danny says while nodding like an idiot. See? Lines like that is the reason he is generic. And because he's generic, I need to make fun of him so people don't start bashing this book for being generic.

Anyway, regardless of the fact that India in 1856 wasn't exactly the most peaceful place in the world, that is the time that we need to go to it seems. Now that she has answered two of my questions, time for her to answer the third, the equally important, if not more important, question – what do we have to do so that Roswaisa doesn't die in by the hands of Aknin Vielos when she did?

She straightens herself up and says, ”That's all.”

Wait! What!?

”Now we have wasted enough time here and you need to go and do the damn job.”