Vol 2 Chapter 7 (1/2)

On the day of the wedding, Hirosue left his house in theand arrived at Tokyo Station before twelve o’clock It had been raining in his hometown, but the weather here was clear and sunny Perhaps it had rained a little in the , for there were some puddles left behind

He took the train to the business hotel he was planning to stay at He was told he could not check in yet, so he left his things with the front desk The wedding was at five, and the venue was about fifteen minutes by train from the hotel If he caive hiet ready

It would have been easier for hi venue, but he had chosen one a little far away because it was a five-minute walk from Matsuoka’s apartment

Hirosue knew Matsuoka had a reason for not infor him of his new phone nus up when Matsuoka was avoiding contact and confrontation Hirosue was only acting on his own urge to see him; it was not like he could offer Matsuoka the kind of solution that would make him happy

But even so, he reasoned with hiain, he wondered if he would be satisfied just to meet with Matsuoka What if they ht of him? Would it still remove the knot in his heart?

The cicadas were causing a deafening din around Matsuoka’s apart froe trees in front of the bicycle lot When he looked up at Matsuoka’s suite from outside, he could see the curtain drawn open He had a feeling that Matsuoka was ho in front of his door, Hirosue could not ring the doorbell He was afraid If Matsuoka gave hi here now, he felt like he wouldn’t be able to say a single word back Hirosue had a feeling that Matsuoka was still in love with him, but perhaps that was his assu on ith so of Matsuoka’s life over these past four ed his cell phone nu

There was a heavy click as the lock was drawn, and before Hirosue could mentally brace himself, the door to Matsuoka’s apartment opened Hirosue drew back, startled, and was startled once more to realize that the person as at the door was not Matsuoka, but a young woirlfriend?

“Um… can I help you?” the woman asked when she noticed Hirosue

“Uh… um, no, that’s okay”

The wo towards the elevators She looked like she was in her mid-twenties She had short hair and a cute face So Matsuoka had gotten a girlfriend after all Unlike Hirosue, who had whiled his life away in the country as if suspended in ti steadily forward

His fingertips trembled Matsuoka had told him he loved hiht of it that way His “friend” had only gotten a girlfriend―as he so agitated about?

Besides, what had he come here to do in the first place? It was to see Matsuoka His objective had been to see Matsuoka, and that didn’t irlfriend or not In fact, if he did have a girlfriend, Hirosue could have her handle the ros so the two of them could just be friends That hat he had alanted, but somewhere he didn’t feel quite satisfied

But Hirosue wasn’t sure of that fact yet He hadn’t asked her if they were lovers Maybe they were only acquaintances His feet began toat the elevators

“Um―excuse me”

The woain”

“May I ask hat kind of relationshi+p you have with Mr Yosuke Matsuoka?”

“Huh?” the wo her head

“You’re acquainted with Mr Yosuke Matsuoka, right?”

“Who is that?” the woman looked at him warily

“You just came out of Matsuoka’s apartment, didn’t you?”

“That’s my apartment”

This time, Hirosue was the one to tilt his head “But… it’s Rooht?”

“I’ve been living there since May of this year Maybe you’re talking about the person who used to live there before et advertisements addressed to someone like that”

“That’s… um, I’m really sorry”

Hirosue left the aparted his cell number and e-mail address, but had even moved out of his apartment Was this on purpose? Or was it a coincidence?

On a weekday, he would perhaps be able to catch Matsuoka if he waited at the station close to the office But today was Saturday, and tomorroas Sunday He had to head back home on Sunday Even if he extended his stay for one more day until Monday to stake hi back home if he waited past the end of the work day Either way, he wouldn’t be able to see Matsuoka Stay until Tuesday, then? But he had work to help out with, and he couldn’t afford to be out of the house for so long

“What should I do?” hehe could do Nothing If he ell-aware of one thing, it was precisely that

After returning to the hotel, he agonized over how else he could get in touch with Matsuoka He wasn’t completely out of options yet: he could still stay until Tuesday and wait in front of the office But that would take up more time than necessary, and there was still the possibility that Matsuoka, being in Sales, would go straight home from his rounds There were also people at the office whom Hirosue was acquainted with If he could, he preferred to avoid exposing himself to the disdainful stares of those he kneould wonder what business Hirosue had at the office when he had been laid off

Or he could ask someone But he was reluctant to bother Hayama just for Matsuoka’s contact infor That left hi fukuda, his former boss and Matsuoka’s acquaintance They had barely talked at all since Hirosue was transferred to Koishi+kawa, and fukuda did not like him much

Maybe it would be quicker just to go to the after-party instead of asking around Matsuoka would probably be there Would anyone bother to invite Hirosue to the after-party when he was in a different department? ―That didn’t o That way, no one would probably refuse

He thought about this and that until it was nearly tied into his suit and fixed his hair He fought a fierce struggle with the stubborn cowlick on the back of his head Once he was able to pat it down into a respectable for the day, the sky was now darkened with a layer of clouds It looked like a bit of rain was on the way

He had left early with time to spare since he didn’t want to be late, but he lapsed into thought and ended upback

Once he got off at the right station, Hirosue found himself in the middle of construction work There was only one available exit, which led him out in the opposite direction fro his stop and taking detours, and by the time Hirosue arrived at the venue, it was three ned in and gone inside The only person left in the lobby was the receptionist

As Hirosue scribbled hastily in the guestbook, he spotted Matsuoka’s name three names above his His hand stopped in surprise The man he had wanted to see was here Haya, but Matsuoka had also been invited to the ceremony

“Sir―the cereed hie He received a table nu held The doors were already closed, and when he opened it quietly, he could see that everyone was already seated He stood lost in front of the door, not knohere he was supposed to sit Someone who looked like a staff member approached hihts suddenly went out It looked like the bride and groom were about to make their entrance

“This is your seat, sir” He was offered a chair at a round table of about ten people It was too dark to see very well, but Hirosue felt like there were a lot of females there He could feel all eyes on hi He tried to draw his chair, and ended up tripping over nothing and falling forward

“Whoa!” he cried out unintentionally He could hear a suppressed giggle froo beet-red from embarrassment

As soon as he sat down, a fanfare began to play A set of doors, illu open inwards Hayakiroom

The rooht, and Hirosue could finally see the faces of the people seated at his table His breath caught in his throat He doubted his eyes The very ht beside him His hair was a little shorter, and the stubble on his chin was still there He looked like he had lost even ht

“It’s been a while, Matsuoka,” Hirosue said The lanced at him

“It has,” he said, inclining his head It was too dim to clearly see the expression on his face, but his tone of voice seemed somewhat distant

The table that Hirosue was seated at seemed to consist mostly of people from the sales department There were five men and five women The only person he knew there was Matsuoka

Hirosue had figured their adjacent seats would enable the on his conversation with the youngto even look at Hirosue Toto Hirosue’s left was a gregarious, slightly older man in his mid-fifties who frequently tried to start up a conversation with him It seemed the man had been Hayama’s boss before she transferred to Sales, when she was still in Goods Management Presumably he had been quite uncomfortable at a table full of Sales people, for as soon as he found out that Hirosue had been at Koishi+kawa Laboratory, he mentioned he had been transferred there for a number of months himself, and seemed to feel quite a sense of camaraderie between them

Hirosue rather wanted to speak with Matsuoka, but the -winded All Hirosue had to do on his end was insert an interjection once in a while, since the man carried on very well on his own But the man also switched from one topic to another without pause, and it was hard to see an end

About halfway through the cereeo to the restroo with Matsuoka also turned to talk to the olderon his other side Matsuoka, without so food to his mouth

“Um, would you like any beer?” Desperate to start a conversation somehow, Hirosue offered to pour Matsuoka solance at him

“Thank you,” he said, thrusting out his half-elass

“You look like you’re doing well”

Matsuoka took only one sip of the beer before putting his glass down

“Sure, well enough” Matsuoka’s words were aloof enough to make him feel uncomfortable Matsuoka seemed just as distant as Hirosue had first sensed Hirosue wondered if the ht made it suddenly more difficult to talk But Hirosue still opened his

“I didn’t expect to see you here, Matsuoka”

“Well, I am in the same cohort as Hayama I didn’t think you’d be invited either, Hirosue”

He was distant, but he did not ignore hiive him an answer

“I e- But I couldn’t get through”

“Oh, I changed my phone”

“Why?”

After an aard pause, Matsuoka sood would it do you to know?”

Hirosue hesitated over his answer

“I dropped it,” Matsuoka went on to explain without a hitch “There was a specific model I wanted, so I switched wireless providers while I was at it”

So Matsuoka had not changed his phone to sever ties with hi of his next words when Matsuoka turned to theto leave Hirosue behind The olf, even though Hirosue had told hiain, he lost the chance to talk to Matsuoka

Soon, it was tie, and Hayaot out of his seat at almost the saeht the one to the restroom, but there was no one there He would have had to run into Matsuoka on his way out because he had co was still going on Had Matsuoka gone home? Don’t tell me,Hirosue wondered as he ht a whiff of cigarette smoke

He remeeway tucked away to his right At the end of the passage was a sainst the wall s was not prohibited at the venue, and those anted to smoke were free to do so Indeed, the man who came to sit down beside Matsuoka was a heavy smoker

Matsuoka looked up at the ceiling and let a ribbon of smoke issue lazily from his lips Hirosue are that Matsuoka smoked, but the man had also said he only did so once in a while He had only set-well visit at his apartment

Matsuoka wore an apathetic expression with the cigarette in his mouth He looked like a totally different person Hirosue could not help but stare; he had never seen the ether, Matsuoka had always been cheerful and energetic―that was the only impression he had of the man

Matsuoka took his tiround the rest out and threw it in the ashtray When he finally turned this way, his eyes met Hirosue’s, and a look of clear surprise and dismay crossed his face Matsuoka dipped his face aardly and kept his eyes lowered as he slipped past Hirosue

“Um―” Hirosue called out Matsuoka’s feet took three or four steps and stopped But they soon began to ain as the man made his way back into the banquet hall Matsuoka had definitely heard Hirosue’s voice―he had stopped in his tracks, after all―but he had kept going without turning around Hirosue had clearly been ignored

Matsuoka still gave him the most minimal of answers in the presence of other people, but perhaps this was his honest reaction Matsuoka no longer wanted to talk to hi to do with him anymore

Hirosue felt like he was pluround had disappeared beneath his feet Matsuoka had gotten completely sick of him Oblivious to that fact, Hirosue had foolishly co to see him Now, he felt immensely et in touch All the signs had been there But he had pretended not to notice

He couldn’t be away from his seat forever, so Hirosue returned to the banquet hall Inside, Haya the cake

The cereressed steadily, but all of it passed unnoticed before his eyes Thebeside him now seemed like a world away Hirosue had wanted so badly to speak to him, but now he couldn’t remember what he had wanted to say He didn’t kno to interact with Matsuoka any him

The man had loved him―had told him he loved him That hy Hirosue could talk to him without restraint Now, the Matsuoka beside hi, and was like a co fro His claim to love Hirosue must have been some kind of abnormal blip Hirosue was sure of it

Reality was right beside him; yet, Hirosue unearthedhisand childishly stubborn Had those been lies? No That had also been Matsuoka, too But thehim the cold shoulder beside hi squeezed painfully His throat turned dry

Hirosue continued to fret in agitation over the fir, the wedding was over The bride and groouests exited into the lobby Hirosue held the bag containing his wedding souvenir in one hand and cast his eyes around to search for Matsuoka

It’s no use nohispered his easily-discouraged self Look at the way he’s ignoring you He’s gotten sick of you You shouldn’t ain Get over it You and hiaze ―If I was over it, I wouldn’t be here I wouldn’t be looking for Matsuoka

“Hey, Chief Matsuoka, are you co to the after-party, too?”

Hirosue heard a young man’s voice behind hi in the shadow of a pillar to his right The girls who had been sitting at their table surrounded him like flowers in a bouquet

“Knock it off with that ‘Chief’ thing I’ wryly

“You bet I won’t,” the young man responded cheekily “It’s how I push your buttons” Matsuoka gave thewell, even with theattitude

“Yeah, I’ll go to the after-party,” Matsuoka said “I told Hayao”

The cheerful atroup irls surrounding Matsuoka were looking up at hiazes, Hirosue felt so stir restlessly in the bottom of his heart

“You knohat I thought? Ms Haya man remarked insolently

“That’s not true!” the girls around him protested It was true; to be co would be quite an exaggeration But still…

“He looked like a really nice guy Sweet, you know? I like those types of people,” Matsuoka said reflectively

“Well, he sure did see man conceded “Oh, anyway, about the after party―the restaurant is a little far away, so I thought we could split up and go by taxi I had them book about three cars…”

Once Hirosue missed this opportunity, there were none left to him And because there were other people around, he kneouldn’t be pointedly ignored Hirosue approached the group of sales depart about Matsuoka noticed hiave him a smile and spoke to him

“You were sitting at our table, right?”

“Um Yes”

Matsuoka had turned around and was looking at him

“U if I could talk to Mr Matsuoka―”

All eyes in the group turned to Matsuoka Just then, they heard the voice of a hotel employee

“Is Mr shi+nozaki here?”

The young ht hand

“I’m here, I’m here,” he said “Looks like that’s the first taxi Chief Matsuoka, what do you want to do? I was thinking you could go with the first group…”

“Oh, sure I’ll go on ahead, then” Matsuoka put on a fake-looking smile “I’m on my way to the after-party now,” he said to Hirosue “Let’s catch up another tiirl beside Matsuoka spoke up

“Would you like to come to Ms Hayama’s after-party, too?” she offered

“Mr Hirosue’s from a different depart to be full of Sales people I’m sure he’d only find it a nuisance if you invited him”

“Oh―I guess so I’ized hastily Hirosue was sure Matsuoka was only using their different departments as a polite excuse to avoid him

“When would I be able to talk to you?” he persisted

There was no answer to Hirosue’s question Hirosue no longer knew Matsuoka’s phone nued as well Try as he may, it was difficult to establish an opportunity if Matsuoka was not willing to