Vol 2 Chapter 5 (1/2)

It idely said that spring was coo they had seen snow on the hot springs trip For a while, Hirosue remained under the impression that it was still winter But the temperature soared once they passed the twentieth of March; winter coats soon becaht

About two days before the official announce overtime

“Can I see you today?” he said They had both been busy ork and overtih they still e-ether yet

“I’m fine, but are you, Matsuoka?” Just yesterday, Hayama had returned from headquarters to tell him that Sales was in utter chaos The core of the sales depart a quarter of its staff, and the succession of duties was not going well The department was upside-doith confusion

Being originally froone back for two days this week to sort out their ad in only every other day, they were neck-deep with no way out The head clerk had negotiated directly with Human Resources, and they had sent a contract worker to fill in starting this week The woh she worked only froot as much work done as two people Thanks to her, Hirosue had been able to finish work at around seven these past days

“I’m fine So, can I see you?” He had never heard Matsuoka sound so tense Perhaps he was stressed out froo for drinks to let off some steam Since Hirosue was almost finished with his oork, he pro up

Matsuoka always invited hi work hours, even during overtie Everyone has ti of it

After they met up at the station, on Matsuoka’s request they went to a cozy izakaya with private booths instead of their usual place “Just to change things up,” Matsuoka had said, and Hirosue did not doubt his words The menu was varied with numerous unusual dishes, but Hirosue felt like the food at their usual izayaka was better

Matsuoka did not le cos were busy for him, he only said that it was like that all the time, and the topic went no further Yet Matsuoka still appeared restless, constantly checking his watch and fidgeting

“Hirosue, are you interested in law at all?” Matsuoka asked out of the blue, just as Hirosue ondering about his peculiar attitude

“What’s this all of a sudden?” he asked back, but Matsuoka was strangely vague

“Er,” he said uncertainly

“Are you in some kind of trouble that has to do with the law?”

“No, not really, but…”

This was not the usual Matsuoka as outspoken and clear-cut Even though he had started the topic, the htly down and didn’t even try to look at Hirosue Perhaps it was sohts over in his head for a little while

“I don’t know any lawyers personally, but if you can wait, do you want me to ask my relatives if they know anyone?”

“Oh―I didn’t mean I wanted you to introduce me to a lawyer”

Hirosue had been aluess Now, he had no idea what Matsuoka was trying to say In the space of their silence, a cell phone started to ring Matsuoka opened it, checked the caller, and lightly clicked his tongue

“Excuse me for a bit,” he said, and left their booth Hirosue was left alone with nothing to do, so he drank as he nibbled at the food Matsuoka came back about ten minutes later, but he was even more restless than before

“Who called?” Hirosue asked, wondering if he was prying too much

“One of my juniors from work,” Matsuoka answered “Heup thea lot of those kinds of probleo back to the office after this, too”

“I guess we’ll wrap up after we eat, then?”

“Sorry for doing this to you after dragging you out here,” Matsuoka apologized “But I wanted to see you today, no ive him an answer by tomorrow, so―”

“Your senior?”

“Oh―” Matsuoka blurted softly, then lowered his face As Hirosue sat confused and uncoain decisively “A former upperclass to be opening his o firm”

“Wow, that’s good for him He must be really capable”

Perhaps Matsuoka was involved in some kind of dispute after all But if he already knows a lawyer, why does he need to coain, perhaps it was a matter that ard to discuss with an acquaintance

“That’s why he’s looking for someone to do administrative work and reception when he opens his firm He said the candidate wouldn’t need any specialized knowledge or qualifications for now, but he did say he’d want thes”

Hirosue felt the underside of his heart bristle unpleasantly Where was this discussion going?

“The other day, Hayama came back to headquarters, and… the topic turned to you, and I heard you were going through a hard time”

Matsuoka had phrased it vaguely as a “hard time”, but there was no doubt he had heard from Hayama about the unofficial announceone up on the list of resigning employees on the bulletin at headquarters Hirosue was prepared to face it when Matsuoka found out through the bulletin―that, at least, was inevitable But this―

“There’s a guy froer than you,” Matsuoka said “He got really fed up with the way things were being done at the conation slip in their faces and transfer to another company”

So it seeh to find a post at another co laid off He was different―coone to interview after interview only to be rejected

“I heard fro for a new job, and I wanted to help somehow,” Matsuoka explained “I contacted soested his place But he told ht not beto uy It’s adht not be as high as our company, but I don’t think the conditions are too bad”

Matsuoka’s concern for his layoff was probably genuine Although it was a fortunate offer, the an to lose syan to mount within him

Hirosue balled his hands into fists under the table

“I noticed you see me,” Matsuoka continued “And the other day, when youback to the countryside… I wondered if so had happened When I heard the news from Hayama, I finally knehat it was about, so…”

It was true that he had been depressed since receiving news of his layoff He had compared himself to Matsuoka, as a capable man, and ed in his share of self-pity But that was his own responsibility, and it was his problem He didn’t want to be told what to do He didn’t want people to poke and pry Although he was hard-pressed to find his next job, he hadn’t asked Matsuoka to do him any favours He hadn’t even mentioned a word of it to the man

No amount of interviews had been able to secure Hirosue a new post But with Matsuoka’s power, he would be given a job with good conditions The sum of all his efforts paled in the face of Matsuoka’s social network

I can find my own job Just leave ht take time, but I’ll do it on ry and frustrated But when he wondered if his frustrations steative views of hier turned to sadness

Why did Matsuoka take the pains to do things for him? Was it out of sympathy? Or pity? Hirosue was overcout He didn’t want to see Matsuoka’s face, or hear his voice, or be near him anymore

Hirosue took his wallet out of his bag and placed a few thousand yen on the table

“I’ ho for an answer

“Huh? Are you alright?” Matsuoka scrambled out of his seat

“Matsuoka, you should stay and eat You’ve barely touched any of the food”

“Yeah, but―hey, wait Wait up I’, too!”

Hirosue left the restaurant and walked briskly without waiting for Matsuoka to finish paying the bill He wished the man wouldn’t follow hi after his

“Hirosue!”

On the deserted sidewalk, he was pulled back by the arh to make Hirosue bristle, and he violently shook the man off Matsuoka looked like he was about to cry

“I―I’m sorry”

“For what?” The coldness of his own voice surprised him

“I went and I… did so that was completely uncalled for” Matsuoka’s head was bowed and he was tre So you’re aware of what you did, Hirosue wanted to say, but he didn’t He felt like putting it into words would just make him feel even more detestable

“You were just concerned for ht, Matsuoka? Thanks for the job offer, but I’ve already decided to go back to my hometown after I quit”

It had only been one of his options, but he spoke of it as if it were set in stone Matsuoka’s eyes fleide open

“What…?” he said softly

“I have toto get busy I don’t think I’ll be able to see you like I used to”

“But last tian, but Hirosue interrupted him

“Bye, then,” he said shortly, and got into a taxi The trains were still running at this time, but he felt if he walked to the station, Matsuoka would come after him

He vacantly watched the scenery slip past him out theSoon, unable to stand it anyh, enough… He had had enough of everything―of his immature, miserable self, and of meddlesome Matsuoka

“Sir, are you feeling ill?” The driver soundedsoiled than about how Hirosue was feeling Hirosue said nothing as he lifted his face and shi+fted his gaze onceat the scenery He was re, over and over, about their conversation at the restaurant With each recollection, the black fog in his head grew thicker and thicker until it filled every corner ofelse

He heard the ringtone for an inco e-mail It was from Matsuoka

‘I’htless of me But―’

The e-er, but Hirosue turned off his cell phone without reading the rest

Although the option of going back home had always been in Hirosue’s mind, the prospects of re-employment always made hian to take solid, realistic shape within hio back to the countryside―to take up a job completely unrelated to administration rather than endure the unpleasantness of re here

The o back, Hirosue found his heart feeling lighter That hen he realized for the first tiht a life in the city nor a new career

Now that he was going back to the country, he had to choose whether to go back to his parents’ home or rent an apartment But before that, he had to explain to his fas had turned out this way He deliberated whom to tell first, and decided to tell his older brother

Hirosue told his brother that he had been laid off froo back to the countryside His brother was silent for a

“Alright,” he said in firm solidarity “Co as you need to But there’s no need to move completely out of your apartment, is there? Don’t you need to find your next job over there?”

“I’ for a job out in the country”

“You won’t find any good jobs here Mo at our factory To be honest, we’re in need of help since ave birth and the baby’s been a handful, but we’re not well-off enough to give you a salary”

Reality was not so forgiving

“Look for your new job over there,” his brother said “As long as you’re not picky, there are a lot more options than the countryside”

Although that was his brother’s argu weariness towards his unsuccessful job search and hisback and forth between the office and his apartment Even if he were to return to the city to search for a job, he wanted to start with a clean slate―that was the argument he used to convince his reluctant brother as he made the decision to move out of his apartment after all

His brother told him he would tell their parents that he had quit because he was exhausted fro the layoff, he was allowing his little brother to save face It was his way of being considerate, which uilty and saddened

On top of his work, Hirosue was now suddenly busy with contacting his landlord, arranging for ahis things together

He received e-mails from Matsuoka every day ‘Whenever you’re free―it doesn’t matter what time―please let me knoant to talk to you,’ it said each time Hirosue’s ansas always, ‘I’m sorry, I’m busy,’ and he did not make time to see the man

His feeling towards Matsuoka were mixed and hard to put into words He knew Matsuoka had onlyHirosue hadn’t asked for Yet, he admitted his attitude towards the man as concerned for him was inexcusably immature

All in all, this incident had not caused him to hate Matsuoka; he just did not want to see him He couldn’t stand the sense of inferiority he felt before Matsuoka Once he had coed to go back to having a regular relationshi+p with theintroduced to a job opportunity had ive it some time until they calmed down He would not see Matsuoka until then He did not want to become the kind of miserable man he hated in front of Matsuoka

The last day of this fiscal year fell on the last weekend of March Hirosue’s last day at the office fell on March 29 Three days ago, he had already gone to a slightly contradictory farewell party which consisted ofbehind Since Hayama was scheduled to work at headquarters on his last day, she and Hirosue had said their farewells on the day before