Chapter 757 (1/2)

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”Xiaonan, are you afraid that I will leave you as I did five years ago?”

I shuddered all over

since that night, I had a close relationship with Ziyuan, but it wasn't as casual and intimate as the day when she just came here, when we met again in the office after a long separation. We were consciously and carefully maintaining a balance, not trying to test the things hidden in each other's hearts. Maybe it was a kind of silence Qi, maybe, it's just that we don't have the courage and worry about each other's not having the courage to break the balance. It's like hanging a thin layer of gauze between the two people. I look at her and she looks at me. Although I can't see clearly, I know that the other is there. So it's very safe. We dare not touch that layer of gauze, because we are afraid, that gauze The haze behind is just a mirage, that layer of yarn, that is to be honest, I said, ”I'm afraid.”

”You think you should be responsible for me?” Purple garden really cares about this.

I don't deny that this is a very important reason for me, who has a family heritage in my bones, but

”time will not go back, what you missed will not come back, what you left five years ago, what you left me was regret, what you left me after five years, what you left me is not only regret for the whole life”

this is not a confession, but it is the same as confession, The purple garden is very quiet, as if she knows her position in my heart better than I do. She said softly: ”Xiaonan, I believe that there will not be another person in the world who knows you better than me, so I believe that part of your heart belongs to me, but what about Cheng Liusu?”

”I don't know.” I'm a cheeky and self defeating person. I'm a playboy, but I don't have the capital to be a playboy. I don't have the luxury villa with fragrant cars and banknotes. I don't have the sweet words and the sweet words. I don't even have a word that can make the purple garden happy. If there is, it must be a lie without conscience. I wryly smile and say: ”I also feel that I'm too selfish. I don't want to miss what I've missed. I don't want to lose what I have now. But in the face of temptation, I still don't have enough resistance. I can restrain myself, but I can't find a way to balance between you. If I choose to leave, I'll choose happiness. I can cut my heart with three hearts and two minds, but I don't know, I don't know you What is her happiness? Because you never said it or refused to say it. You always said that the time has not arrived ”

Ziyuan still didn't answer me what her happiness is, but she didn't hesitate to answer me:” if you don't let me go, I won't go. ”

Yes, it's very straightforward. Just like an aggressive person who did something wrong and took all responsibilities, I want to make up for her, not because I should pay for that night's romance, but more because I want to make up for the guilt of those five years. When she thinks about me and thinks about me, I try my best to forget her. Now, this one should hate death My girl, however, always has a very or even 12 points of self blame and guilt for me. How can I feel?

”You said that before.”

”Don't you believe it?”

I shook my head. ”What is it like not to leave? Free from my life as I am now, afraid that I will enter your life? I'm not qualified to ask you to come closer to me, but I know that the so-called ”will not leave” that can't be close to each other now is definitely not what you or I want. ”

The purple garden didn't deny, turned over, murmured: ”close to you, your life will be disrupted by me, I can be yours, but you are not mine, you think this is your selfishness, but I chose to be a bad woman, has used up all my courage, you know how cowardly I am, so I am not suitable for bad last life.”

”I can't understand”

”it doesn't matter, you will understand sooner or later,” Ziyuan looked at me and said: ”don't be afraid to hurt me, because you are more hurt than me, don't be afraid of me leaving, unless you drive me away, don't be afraid to hurt me, because I don't want to be a bad woman, do a wrong thing, is enough for me to spend my whole life confessing, do you remember? From small to large, the right to choose is always on your side. Just as in those days, I just need to stand behind you silently ”