Part 8 (2/2)

I backed up another step and slipped on a sli to hunt Everything got the hell out of the way before it arrived I took one more step before panic set in I lifted the spear aboveof the water, back to shore

I could feel the bastard bearing down on h the water I let out a couple of screams that I'm sure sounded less than manly I looked behind me and the fin had rolled over on the other side Was the shark drunk? He came at me, passed by and hit the reef at a really fast rate His fin flew up as he came to a stop

I made it to shore and clawed my way up the beach, just like I did the first day here Deja-daray feet that had stopped just in front ofat the water I followed her gaze to the giant gray shark that flopped around like he was drowning on air He really was gray, like a weird shade I know sharks are gray and all, but he was alot toI wondered if I could kill and eat him before she bit him That would be cool How bad could shark steaks be? He flopped a lot onna say like a fish out of water Oh haha! I am so damn funny today Is that what they call irony?

He lifted his upper body in the air and brought it down hard A piece of so flew out of his mouth and hit the sand in front of me What the hell? It looked like part of a hand Wow, ot a bad feeling in the pit of my stomach

I took another step toward the shark and stared into its eyes, which should be big and spooky, right?

Isn't that how sharks look? Like they are ready to eat you at any ot a few feet away and crouched down

It reared up again, and I could see that it had no eyes They were eaten away in the socket Both of they crap like weird jellyfish I fell back onat irl onwept

I didn't just have a zombie shark I had a BEACHED zombie shark

I wonder if there is a cliff around that I can jump off

Day 25

My Girlfriend Sucks

Hi, Diary!

Look, another day and I am still alive on this cursed island I can't believe I once found this place beautiful If I everto use the money to firebomb this hole back into the ocean I hate it here, I H A T E it I hate everything about this pit of despair The heat, the hu in a sauna is the ideal life No siree-bob

Don't even get h I h at her as she fell down-a lot When I first found her body, she was still pretty good looking I ht? But she was better than looking at palot to play dress-up, treat her like my doll, make fun of her, paint her face like a clown That was a fun day, clowning around with my pet zombie

And now I have a zombie shark to worry about

I went to the waterfront and looked at him He was so pitiful, stuck on the shore with his tail flapping up and down He should be dead Scratch that; he is dead Undead What sick God coht noould take this thing back to civilization just like they did King Kong, and I would sell hiirl and make a whole zombie circus Maybe I could run it I'd call it the ”circus zombies of the damned,” because that is what I am dah I was standing a good twenty or thirty feet away He just snapped over and over again like I was right in front of hiiant teeth, and they were surrounded by soone bad

I cleaned upwas to kill it

I had the spear, and I was ready for war Again, sorta Like the day her husband ca this day was going to suck worse I was lost in thought when I felt her hand on my shoulder I just about juht up on rab my neck I stuag on, so I wasn't that worried about being bit She stillnoises as she tried to bite it A rotten serator after soone bad and sat for months

The noise orse, like a bite and inhale at the same time Her lips touched ive irlfriend sucks I tore her arm from around s spread, and I tried like hell not to look between theht have been up to in the ht

Oh God, oh God, oh God, there were indeed things down there, s that looked like so to have to clean them up Oh God, oh God, oh God! God damn it!

I snatched up the spear and stoh a layer of Silly Putty The shark waited for me with a vacant look in his eyes Vacant because he had no eyes It wouldn't be untrue to say he didn't knohat he was in for Not that it mattered They probably rely on smell like in the shows on TV where they du

His eyes were dried out and looked like hollow sockets Weird stuff still hung there, but it was dry and looked like string He curled his body as I walked along beside hiet a bite of ht where they were

The tide was rolling in, and I could see waves for a change Usually it was pretty calm here Don't knohy I haven't attempted to build a raft and sail away yet Probably because I don't know the first thing abouta waterborne craft If I could do that, then I would have left weeks ago Probably been swept away to sea, drowned Nah, I was ain, I had the tail section fro fros I could build a small cover out of palm trees and sticks I would have to leave her behind, of course Probably wouldn't have to go far The visitors to my little slice of paradise probably came from somewhere nearby I would probably reach another island in a matter of hours Maybe half a day If I sailed past one, there had to be others after it Or so I reasoned

I actually looked around the immediate area for stuff to build a raft with There were a lot of ss and some other debris, like sticks I could use for the raft if I decided to make one I should use a piece of paper and try to draw out what I want to do Or at leastto ure artwork, eh, Diary?

Ally is going to get such a kick out of the pictures I have drawn I et rid of a few of theet too irl She will be mad about a lot of stuff I should uys ant to hear ainst all zombies What if Oprah wants me on her show? What if I have to talk about all the stuff I have done?

Well, that's in the future My i a zombie shark

I walked around him on both sides He smelled worse than she did, and she smelled like death He had a definite stench from the sea, but it also reminded me of the time someone pulled a prank on me at work They hid an open can of tuna behind my desk, and as it rotted, it smelled a little worse each day After a feeeks, I wasn't able to go into uys to hunt around for the source

I didn't knoho did it Probably Derek frouy hates me for some reason I call theets, but that is no reason to do soon the office supplies, so without el Friday goodbye

The surf was picking up, bashi+ng away at the reef, but I had tih in to suck the bastard back out to sea I would have to kill hi the dead guy's hand killed hiht him back, or zombified him Whatever I am supposed to call the damn disease Did that otten parts of the husband in ht I was covered in crap after that, and it took h my body?

I felt fine I felt as healthy as could be expected, given the circu to be really pissed

I took the spear and stabbed at the shark I hit the side of his head, and it went sideways, cutting a big slice in his cheek Tough sucker He turned his dry head toward ain but this ti his cheek and did little dae I lifted the spear and then so Bad shark, die!

He didn't care for that one bit, so I tried again with the stabbing I ran to the other side and drove the spear into his eye socket It went in, but the ray head reared to the side and ripped the spear out of my hand Ah, crap!

She was back on her feet and, of course, picked that ti, she would have no ti spear only to have her try to latch onto irl and a beached zo die? Oh yeah

I pushed her offon, then fell I backed up a step as she ended up on all fours The shark popped his head around and the spear caught her right across the ass, which sent her flying Stupid shark, you don't hit rab the spear but had to juered in a circle as if she couldn't get her bearings Then she walked toward the shark with her hands out like she was going to eat hiet a bite of her She went down as the spear caught her again This tis went up in the air and her head sot one foot up in the air and tried to stand, but the shark's mouth closed on her ankle and, just like that, snapped her foot off