Part 14 (2/2)

Monday, November 5, Ashby-de-la-Zouch My Independent was not delivered this ent to complain and collect it in person A youth of about 14 was sitting on the pavement outside the shop, next to a balloon wrapped in a bundle of rags The balloon was sporting a crudely felt-tipped beard and round glasses

As I passed by, the youth h the save hiht bastard” I said I had rarely seen such a poor representation of Guy Fawkes He adjusted the rags on top of the balloon's head and said, ”That's because it ain't Guy Fawkes, it's Osht”

11parden bonfire party I will ever throw The sausages burst inside the oven, the potatoes burned to cinders, and my economy box of fireworks lasted less than 10 uests were continually turning their heads eastwards, where rockets fro the sky with spectacular patterns and colour

The recreation ground was thronged with my fellow council tenants and their social workers and probation officers The coe of the fireworks and, in a daring social experiment, Wayne Drabble, the arsonist who burned down the scout hut last year, was in charge of the bonfire I bumped into Mohaest brother, Iht alongside his Islamic brothers

Mohairlfriend, Kylie Dodge, to cover herself up with a burka, and walk 10 paces behind hioing to cover them up for nobody Mohamed went on to say that he doubted that Ihanistan He said, ”And he'd have to buy a beard from a joke shop, coz he ain't never needed to shave, not once in his whole life”

Sunday, Novewith Williahts, I passed a group of ancienttowards the warwreaths of poppies, others had medals pinned to their anoraks

One old bloke, a double a pushed in a wheelchair by his wizened wife Williaone, dad?” I answered, ”He left thelish could be free ade band full of spotty youths began to play Pack Up Your Troubles In Your Old Kitbag The old people tried to march in time to the music, but some of them were too slow to keep up Tears pricked my eyes I dashed theh to the Christo to war, to fight ”Osmar” bin Laden I told him that I was a pacifist and did not believe in war William said, ”But what if Mr Bin Laden ca to kill me Would you let him, Dad?”

It was a tricky moral dilemma, which was not helped when , ”Yes, ould you do, Mr bleedin' pacifist?”

I stammered out that in the unlikely circu in William's bedroom, then of course I would arm wrestle Bin Laden to the floor and keep him there until help arrived in the form of a Panda car from Ashby de la Zouch police headquarters

William seeing a bell But h and said, ”The last ti competition was in 1982, at the youth club table-top sports day You were beaten 10 ti that brown jurandma knitted you for your birthday”

My e as Pauline Mole, The Memory Woman

Wednesday, November 21, Ashby de la Zouch

Mohammed has been arrested! His brother Is of Real-Wood logs on the forecourt when he was surrounded by police marksmen, who ordered him to take off his clothes and walk towards theot into the back of the van, Mohaton, who had gone to the garage to pick up the wrestling azine, Raw), ”I was only parked on that double yellow for twothat precious police resources are being squandered on orical novel, Jack And John Towers, is proving difficult to write Mainly because I have never been to New York Yet I must press on Any writer worth his salt has to pen a post-Twin Towers book I expect Will Self is writing along si the multiplex and book tickets for Harry Potter William has said he will kill himself if he isn't taken to see the film soon

Thursday, Nove I offered him a cup of tea and a slice of toast He shook his head and said, irritably, ”It's Ra, ain't I?” He came to tell me that his brother has been detained on ”suspicion of terrorism” Apparently, an anonymous caller had infor lesson at Leicester airport Iift voucher last Christe to Pandora: ”Our mutual school friend, Moha soonest”

Friday, Nove a Free Moha, which includes BP custoainst Daisy Cutters Group and Alan Clarke has promised to attend with his Morris Men No word fro was found on scrap of Bronco toilet paper in Adrians house: Saturday, November 24

4am A dawn raid! Diaries, co arrested under Blunkett's anti-terrorist bill Please infor? I'm finished

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