14 Dance Macabre 1 (1/2)

”You must have chaos within you, to give birth to a dancing star.”

-Friedrich Nietzsche

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I am at all costs, not in any mood to think of anything else. It was just that, the way she looked at me was something so peculiarly putrid that made me feel a little bit uneasy. But then again, I think it could have been a bad gut feeling that I must not take too seriously.

”Please go back to your respective classrooms for the first official commencement of classes. Good day everyone!” the emcee said while slowly turning the microphone in its proper place, which signaled the end of the ceremony.

Together with a large crowd, where everyone was mere strangers in sight, I took my leave from the gymnasium towards 12-A8, where I am supposed to spend my senior high school year. And to make my promenade a little bit more productive, I familiarized the campus along the way, that I might not wander and be disoriented one of these days, which is as easy as doing fundamental trigonometry for someone like me who was fathomed to have an authentic intelligence. Not to brag of course. In any scenario, I trained myself not to think about superiority nor inferiority, because that, is a mindset of the proud, and later is assured to bring forth a downfall. From that downfall, people who succumbed to pride are hell-bent to make ”rock-bottom” their solid foundation to regain the stats which they have lost. But, the proud also works in mysterious ways, because once they hit that lowest point socially, they will consider it their destiny and will take pride in calling it so, hereby withholding them from their right to recover.

Tell you this, what people call ”destiny” is nothing but a stubborn and vague illusion that the majority chose to accept. Why vague? Simple. The moment the creator gave us free will, it was then that the concept of fate and destinies became vague. It's not like I'm in any position to question it though, but entirely, that's what I really feel... And while it might be very anti-climatic, but 'fate' really is something that is dependent on how we live. It's not preordained the moment we were born, it is something that we must ordain ourselves.

It was then after the practical map memorization that I challenged myself with amalgamated with self-thoughts for the lofty, that I, again found myself standing in front of 12-A8's classic door. Yet, unlike my first entrance, this time, I am to open it with complete caution. There's no telling of what lies beyond.

With mere theoretic, speculation shows that my classmates are already there, as I was a little slow in my way here cause leisure got myself hooked on some game of memory and time passed on, without me noticing about it. This is certainly a pinch...that I am hell-bent in enduring.

”Well, there is certainly no use of standing in front of this door acting rather juvenile and idiotic,” I said to myself, to open up a connection between me and sheer confidence. I'm just gonna get this over with.

The moment I glided the doors the second time around, a crowd was already inside, just as I had expected.

I can see the two of my classmates that talked with me earlier during the headmaster's lengthy speech at the back. There are these guys and ladies that seemed to be discrepant of origin, that could be German, tall Englishmen, Black descents, and even more distinguishable by default are the Asians that took the majority of the class.

Yet, as I ceased my observatory vigor, I just noticed that the atmosphere is rather weird and it is certainly not what a classroom of teenagers on the first day of class would seem like. It is, if I am to describe, the epitome of silence and formality. I probably disturbed them from their little friendly chitchat with the main goal of knowing each other more, I thought.

They keep staring at me, making me a little uncomfortable, yet I continued to walk towards the desk by the window that I reserved a while ago completely ignoring the piercing glances that they're continuously giving me.

Why are they so silent? The homeroom teacher is not even here yet? Is this really what it means to be in a school of highly-intellectual individuals? No. I think that's not it. They were so noisy at the opening ceremony. Hayst... I rarely find myself caring for such a superfluous matter, but the formality (which I thought does not coexist in this Millenium anymore), is just too serious to bear, and what even makes it more eccentric is how tense everyone also is.

I even took a glimpse of those two that talked with me in the opening ceremony, yet just like how everybody is acting, they were silent and are sitting in their chairs with this professional stature, not the typical behavior of those that can talk amidst a headmaster's speech.

What the hell is wrong with everyone? Yet, as every introvert would do, I just continued to walk while acting all kuudere while avoiding any eye contact of any sort. But, what I saw the moment that I reached the seat which I claimed for myself was something unprecedented.

It was then, that I finally knew why everyone was acting as formal as they can... Yes. This is indeed my seat. Yet why? The Prima Donna's there sitting valiantly picturesquely, looking rather distracted on the view of the blue pacific.