Chapter 13：... YOU IDIOT! (1/2)

(Note: There is a short R-18 scene in this chapter. It's not 'vanilla', but it's nothing that hardcore technically. Please take note and skip it if it makes you uncomfortable. It's essential to the storyline, however.)

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I purse my lips, and not long after, my crying stops.

Even if Honey's being annoying about all this, she still doesn't deserve to be screamed at, so I put a swift end to that outburst.

I was keeping everything in. Without anyone to talk to, it made me feel so stressed.

It might be a good idea to open up to her. She's someone I can trust, after all.

She comes next to me, uses her handkerchief to wipe away the tears. ”You are one silly woman.”

”Stop worrying about that. You're human, not a robot.”

”It'd be unprofessional if you had done this all the time, but you seldom do. So stop this crap, alright?”

”Besides...” She takes her phone and shows me the time. ”See? You've got nothing to worry about.”

”Talk to me,” Honey says without any urgency in her tone.

She takes one of my hands and gently guides me towards the couch.

Eurgh. My nose is all runny now.

There's a tissue box perched on a side table next to the sofa. Taking some tissues out, I make sure I take care of my nose first before sitting next to Honey.

Feeling some arms around me, the concerned woman who now very much resembles a friend I've known for years says softly, ”We can talk about anything. What is bothering you, Therysia?”

I'm not sure where to start actually, now that I think about it.

My eyes dart from side to side at first before finally deciding on what to say.

”... I think Jett wants to get back together, but... I can't.”

With a brief look of surprise, she responds. ”Oh? Why not?”

Snuggling deeper into her arms, I close my eyes as if I was in pain and sigh. ”It's because I'm not confident he'll still like me once he gets to... really know me when we get more intimate.”

”I'm not just talking about sex... I'm also talking about everyday life. Or you know, if we start dating and...” I pause.

”... Though, to be honest, it's not like I know what it's like to have sex with him since we weren't able to do it bef-”

Honey cuts me off. ”WAIT... WHAT?! You guys have never had sex before?!?!?!” Out of shock, she almost flings me out of her arms.

She grabs hold of my shoulders to get a closer look at my face and exclaims, ”... YOU IDIOT! Then how the heck would you know then if he'll reject you or what?! You don't even know his preferences either! For all we know, you could be the one rejecting him INSTEAD!”

Huh. I never thought of it that way, I guess, but still... ”Uh... I guess...? But most guys are not into kinkier stuff like...”

Honey sneers and puts on a matter-of-fact expression. ”Oh geez, even I know a thing or two about BDSM...”

In my defense, I quickly correct my friend. ”NO! I'm not into BDSM!”

I continue to explain. ”I like some aspects of it, but I'm not into sadomasochism. It's tough to describe this. I feel like I am neither into BDSM nor classified as just 'Vanilla'. That's the most complicated part about this.”

”You know how being in the middle is sometimes worse than being on one end or the other? It's somewhat easier if things are more clearly defined.”