311 308. Beginning of Chapter.txt (1/2)

The magic of the Dimension Graduate ”Prequel (Recall)” is cancelled and the journey of the ”Past Vision” is over. At the same time, a question escapes my mouth.

''Why is my father ......?''

The last thing I saw was my dad's face. There's no doubt about it.

I wonder why he could see my past when he saw Nosfi's memories ....... I'm sure you'll be able to find out what's going on in the world, and you'll be able to find out what's going on in the world. Right now, I need to focus on Nosfy rather than that .......

'Kanami's brother!　Are you okay?　You're a mess!　Did you get a good look at Mr. Nosfi's past?!

Lagune, who was waiting for me to return from magic next to her, shakes my shoulder worriedly.

I lightly looked at the status and found that a large amount of MP had been consumed, but there was no abnormality in the 'state'. However, it's an 'indication' that I can no longer trust completely. I immediately relied on my own senses to confirm the abnormality within my body and brain.

The first thing I did was to check the brightness of the vision in my eyes.

Is the world dark or bright now? How much am I losing because of this 'compensation'? Am I aware of that? --I'm going to find out based on the information from the 'past vision' I just mentioned.

'Yeah, it's okay ....... Thanks, Lagune. I've been watching you. Thanks to you, I finally figured it out: ......

I'm tired after the Great Magic, but my senses feel normal.

Although it's hard to be relieved, it doesn't seem to interfere with my future activities. For now, I'm going to report the results to Lagune, who protected me while using magic.

The only thing I can think of is that it's not a good idea. The founder, who was revered in Revanism, was a really lousy guy ....... Yeah, really .......

It sucked.

But I guess that's my true form. All this time I've been treating myself from a thousand years ago as a different person, calling myself the 'primitive Kanami', but this time I think I was able to treat myself (me) as myself (me).

The man, Aikawa Uzumi, had a wild, foul-mouthed, irresponsible temperament. He had given up on thinking and became desperate, continuing to fight his visible enemies and causing trouble for everyone involved.

'I was hurting, destroying and cornering Nosfies ....... And he insisted that I had nothing to do with it and didn't admit to any of it ...... and at the end of the day, he forgot that he even had anything to do with it .......

...... haha. I knew it was Kanami's brother who was to blame.

I will admit it now.

Then, one more thing. I'll answer why I didn't try to face Nosfi, based on my childhood memories at the end of The Past View.

'Now I know exactly why I avoided Nosfies, too. ...... That Nosfi was me. I'm the very same me who was unable to take a step forward because my parents didn't care about me for a long time and just kept looking at my back. Maybe I hated to see Nosfi do the same thing I did as a kid: ......

'Fuumu ....... I see. I see. I guess I was running away from it in a double sense.

It was myself that I was looking at, projecting onto Nosfy. There was a sense of inferiority there that I didn't want to remember, along with an irrevocable sense of guilt. So I looked away.

'Nosfy has everything about me that I hate ....... I subconsciously avoided her because I didn't want to see that. As it turns out, it's really easy to ....... It was a really lousy thing to do .......

'I see. So what is Kanami's brother going to do when he finds out the truth about Nosfi-san: ......?　That's the most important part.

Maybe it will be business as usual from here on out.

It took me a long time to admit it.

But now I know I was wrong. I understand. And that's what's important.

I never look down, I look forward.

I never look down and look forward. The 'logic-stealers' I've seen in my time have a good look on their faces when they realize their mistakes and the truth. I'll follow suit.

'The usual?　Um, well, what do you mean by ”as usual” ......?

'I'll do my usual guardian (guardian) battle. I'm going to meet Nosfi, face to face, open up and really talk to him. I'll talk anyway. I'm sure the more I talk, the more I'll admit what I don't like about myself ...... and I think I'll end up apologizing all the time ....... Still, I'll finish the 'discussion' with her. I'm responsible for that .......

I see. That's true, as usual. But I have a feeling that even Kanami's brother will lose his mind in the process. So to speak, Nosfi is a guardian for Kanami's brother.

...... okay. I'm confident that I won't break until the end. I'm sure that my battle with the guardians (all of them) to this day has been for this moment as well. I can change this cowardly, lying, calculating, vain, delusional and shameless character - thanks to the guardians (all of them).

This guardian battle will not only be against Nosfi, the ”One Who Steals the Reason of Light”, but I will also be fighting against the ”One Who Steals the Reason of Dimension” myself at the same time.

I've been lecturing the guardians (all of them) with such high-handedness, but the moment it's my turn, I can't even say ”it's impossible”.

It is true that there are many things I don't like about myself. But that disliked part of me is slowly changing thanks to everyone else.

Just by remembering your faces, I can truly believe that I will not make the same mistakes again. Everyone's way of life is a lesson to me, and it lives on in my heart. That's why it's okay. I can face myself, even with NOSFI.

Seeing my enthusiasm for this, Lagune-chan tries to confirm it with suspicion.

I wonder if your stinky personality is really going to change?　It's not easy to get to the fundamentals, is it?

'We can change it. I can definitely change it for Nosfies.

Some things are already changing.

I wouldn't have been able to make any assurances here in the past. I wasn't the kind of person to promise what I couldn't promise. Little by little, my cowardice is disappearing and I'm becoming braver.

That's right.

Since it's a great opportunity, why don't we change the first person to 'I' instead of 'I' ......?

No, it would be a surprise to people to suddenly see it. It's important to change from the substance, not the form.

'Oooh, I didn't know you could withstand this continuous shaking ....... Kanami's brother. That's quite a nice touch! This is a good report for the young lady!

Seeing my bullish assertion, Lagune gives me high marks.

I start to move, reassured by that assessment.

'Right. Let's get back inside and report back to the guys as soon as possible. Then we'll be nosfies soon.

'Oui!　Something tells me my cheeks are safe now!

The story is moving along at a brisk pace, and Ragne squeals with delight as she heads back into the house. Before I can do so, I take a step closer to her and throw her a thank-you note.

'Ragne, thank you so much ....... Ragne gave me the courage to face Nosfi. I will definitely save Nosfi, and I will save you too.

I promise Ragne that I'll take a step closer in calling him, too.

I owe my current firmness of will to Lagune. I won't let her, who has become one of the few people who understands me, die in this kind of battle that I just got involved in.

”Nosfi-san also (・・・・・・・・) I'll save (・・・・) me, too,” says ....... Oh no, that's really bullshit!　I don't hate my brother now.

'Lagne will never let you die. ...... Never.

I'm tempted to be strong and say that I'm going to save Lagne. To put it bluntly, Lagune has now saved me. I can say that I challenged the ”the thief of dimensionality” that was wandering the streets head on and won. I must repay him for this.

As I was making up my mind to do so alone, Lagune, who had been staring back at me, began to let out a dry laugh.

''...... Haha. If I look at Kanami's brother, I feel like I can have courage too.

And finally, I'll talk about myself, not about me.

'Ragne too ......?'

I've always had a habit of giving up, you know. When I know I'm going to lose, I lose motivation and give up - a bad habit of mine. But there are many times when you have to fight, even if you know you're going to lose. Take this wound, for example. There is no time to make excuses because you might die. ......

Like me, she's the type of person who calculates everything before she fights. I think she understands herself that because of this personality, she has missed out on a number of victories until today that she should have been able to obtain.

She was about to make the same kind of decision as I did, that she couldn't continue like this.

'Alright, I'm going to get serious next time!　I'm also going to show you the special moves for the tournament that I've been holding off on!　I think this will probably hold off at least one of the 'witchcraft' guys ...... or at least one effective hit!　Maybe!

It's probably a suggestion that I can use myself somewhere in the upcoming raid on Hoozeyards Castle. That's where he's going to use his ”inner workings” as an example.

However, he doesn't promise that he will definitely win. Seeing that Lagne-like, but slightly different from the usual Lagne, I smile and walk away.

''Ah, I don't have time to make excuses anymore ......!

'Oui!　Come on, let's all go for it!

We both walk into the house where Rustyala and the others are waiting.

We are going to help Nosfi right now. I'm going to ask everyone in the house, not just Ragne, to help me do that.

I mercifully report that I want to fix the situation that has been exacerbated by my continued avoidance of Nosphy, albeit belatedly. On top of that, I'm going to ask for your help, even if it's just through thick and thin, because I'm not sure I'm comfortable fighting on my own. No matter how badly dressed I am, I'll continue to apologize and ask for help.

I'm done pretending to be a good girl for fear that Rustyala and the others will hate me.

Me and Ragne walk down the hallway and head straight straight for the living room where my friends are.

The expression on my face is the complete opposite of what it was when I left the house before I did my ”past vision”.

◆◆◆◆◆ ...

Just then, in the living room, all the people who had finished treating Rastiara were taking a break.

Rustyala was sitting on the largest sofa in the center of the room, with his friends in attendance to give him a massage.

The fact that I, who was supposed to be on guard, had come back makes everyone look a little strange.

To be honest, it's hard to see each other because of one of the battles we just had. But I can't use that as an excuse to put it off. I immediately tell everyone the main issue.

I'm sorry for the suddenness of it all. Now I'm going to go and help Nosphy.

The strange faces lined up are replaced by surprised faces.

In the midst of it all, Maria speaks up on behalf of everyone with a question.

'Well, to help?　Not to beat him?

I respond to that confirmation immediately.

'Yes, I want to help. Rustyala was right, Nosfi was my friend ....... Now, it finally dawned on me. I'm not going to be the one who drove Nosufi to that point, and she wasn't at all to blame. I was the one who drove her to that point. ...... I'm sorry for being selfish all the time and I'm sorry for being selfish again....... I want to help Nosfi with my own hands.

He apologized and suggested his own selfish request.

Maria accepted it with a divine look on her face. Before that response is given, Rainer interrupts her from the corner of the room.

'Christ ....... Could it be that you saw Nosfi's past through the magic of 'past vision'?

I saw it. So I can't see Nosfi as an enemy anymore.

Okay. Okay.

Ryner didn't say anything.

Maybe he knew this was going to happen with Ragne. Once I see the past, I try to protect Nosfy. It seems to be a sudden change of heart, but he seems to have no problem with it as long as it's the result of 'past vision'.

I begin to persuade them to do what I want.

The first one is Rastiara, who was ravaged in the last battle.

I'm sorry for being a grouch last night, ....... From now on, I'll look after Nosphy properly. I believe in you all. I'm not going to let Rustyala do anything I can't do,” he said.

I knew that Rastiara and his friends would make Nosfi happy. I thought it would be best for me to stay out of Nosfi's life. But I was wrong. I will tell you that it was a fatally wrong decision.

At the same time, he vowed to trust the bond he had with his friends. In the previous battle, Rustyala had put his body on the line to prove the bond with his friends that I had assured him was impossible. I can't just deny it without a head start anymore.

Kanami......?

Watching me accept what I was denying last night, Rustyala only mentions the name and gives a question mark.

To be honest, there's still a voice in the corner of my mind that says 'we're all in this together' will never work. But those things and more, I want to change my dislike of it.

'Guys, ....... I'm going to stop thinking so hard. I'm going to stop making excuses before I even try. Nosfies are--

I continue to speak.

It doesn't matter if they're friend or foe anymore. There are more important things than a guardian or the one who steals your reason. What's important is not the Jewelcrus or the Banner of Light from a thousand years ago. What's important is--

'Nosfi is 'my daughter' born in my blood. So I can't leave her alone. I'm coming for her right now.

That's the only reason he declares he's headed there.

Rustyala was the first to speak out before anyone else at that wild but clear talk. Again, it was only a name, but there was an emotion of delight in it.

'...... Kanami!

Maria then calmly spun the words.

'Hah ....... Well, it can't be helped ....... I don't dislike Nosfi-san that much either, and let's go in the direction of persuasion instead of annihilation ......

Even though I showed my decision to confront Nosfi, and even said 'daughter' based on past information, Maria's reaction was far kinder than I had expected.

The same is true for the reactions of Dea, Snow, and Reaper.

''I guess. We played together, and he wasn't such a bad guy.''

Nosfies are strong in so many ways, and it would be great to have them as friends.

I'm always looking for friends!

There was no longer a look of surprise on his face, but rather a look of surprise that he had finally made it here.

'Huh, that ......?　You know, the story that Nosfi is my 'daughter' is at ......

This information alone should have been enough to get everyone's attention.

I knew there was a chance that I would be disillusioned and disliked from it. I had prepared quite a few apologies in my head for this, but the time to use them never came.

'I've known for a while. I asked him for his identity in detail without Kanami-san, so I feel like I found out about it while I was talking about ...... my wife.

Yeah. I hear that. He's like a kid from Kanami, right?

'Um, and Kanami won't recognize that, so you'll always be a rebel?'

I always thought my brother was a thing!

I seemed to be the only one who was upset by the information about 'daughter'.

It seems that while I was avoiding Nosfi, people were usually hearing it directly from the person in question.

'Everyone knew about it ....... Then give me a quick ....... No, I guess I just didn't ask.

Looking back, my attitude towards Nosfi was terrible.

Furthermore, I myself was giving off an air of not wanting to hear anything about it. It's no wonder no one brought it up. It's possible that Ryner and Rustyala, who had been concerned about my recent instability, had kept everyone in the dark. Simply put, I had been making everyone feel uncomfortable all along.

I regret that - but I continue to talk about it without dragging it out.

I drop all apologies and return the words in their place.

'Thank you, ...... guys. If you knew, it's nice to talk to you so quickly. That's why I think I should go apologize to Nosfi right away. So tonight, I'd like to storm the Hooziyaz Castle. I'm sure I'll be a wanted man in this great holy city by now, so I'm going to break in roughly like a bandit.

Then he proposes a night raid as casually as if he were going to apologize to his neighbor's house.

Hearing that rough plan, Rustyala is surprised.

'Oh, oh ......!　Kanami's story doesn't go around and it's fast and concise!　Kanami is supposed to be a lot more complicated than that: ....... What's really going on?　I thought Kanami was going to walk up to Nosfy much later in the first place, but it seems incredibly sudden: ......

'What, so urgent ......?　I think I was thinking about it pretty slowly: ......

It's a bit of a rush. We were just talking about being more careful from now on about how to get between Nosfi and Kanami: ......

I was a little shocked that they were talking about that, and I thought about my change.

From everyone's point of view, my change seems to be sudden.

However, from my point of view, I think I've been bothering my head the whole time I've been in the Great Holy City. I feel like I've caused quite a bit of trouble, especially to Ragne, by showing him the wince many times.

'Lately, Lagune has been telling me all sorts of things that are wrong with me. Like the way Rustyala and the others were talking to Nosfi while I was gone, while everyone else was gone. Maybe that helped?

'What, Lagnechan is ......?'

Rastiara gives me a surprising look.

To be honest, I'm surprised as well, since I thought Ragne was listening to me under Rustiala's direction.

Ragne, who's been named, greets me like a gymnast next to me.

Push!　I've told your brother a lot of things.　I couldn't watch!

...... Feel like maybe you said the hardest thing to say?

I'm not like you guys. Unlike you guys, even if Kanami-san hates me, I'm not so badly hurt. I could say many harsh things.

Although she was told implicitly that she didn't like it too much, her carefree attitude convinced Rustyala and the others.

'Huh, I see. No, I didn't expect the risk-averse Lagne-chan, who hates risk, to work hard while our hands are occupied: ....... Nice, Lagne-chan!　I mean, this party seems to be more of a team effort than I thought it would be!

Haha, it's nice to be praised. But actually, the wound on my cheek doesn't heal easily, so I was just rushing it to save my own skin.

It's still great. It's not easy to do. No, really.

Rustyala walks up next to Ragne and praises him handsomely.

It was the same for everyone in the room, one after the other, praising Ragne's feats.

''Yes. That's really great, Ragne. To make that negative, self-deprecating Kanami-san look positive is an extraordinary feat.''

'You're right, Kanami can be sneaky. Sometimes it's quite troublesome because modesty is often a vicious cycle.

And he's pretty stubborn. He's all talk and no action. I couldn't possibly move that Kanami.

”Above all, big brother has the biggest flaw of all: he can't see his surroundings when it comes to his sister. Lately, you've been falling into a similar pattern with your big sister Rustyala, so I admire you for breaking through that!

In addition to that praise - or as if this one is the main one - my vices are listed.

I know they are true, and I know that I'll just have to fix them in the future, but when there are so many vices lined up, what resonates in my mind resonates.

But honestly, I'm more relieved than shocked or sad.

I was trying to be a good person in front of everyone, but in reality, they knew exactly what was wrong with me.

I had to be the ideal me at all times. But the truth is - I didn't want to hate myself, so I was desperate.

I'm sure you're all aware of my vices and are my friends.

That's a real relief .......

Thus, once the rituals like a unity of purpose using the exposure of my vices are done, Rustyala begins to prepare for the meeting.

''--Okay. Now that the party is united, let's have a strategy meeting for the attack on Foozeyards Castle. Even I, as expected, don't want to have no plan, you know. Well then, we need more chairs, so gather them up.

We drove the central couch we were sitting on to the edge and placed a large desk in the center of the room and arranged everyone's chairs for the number of people around it.

It was much smaller than yesterday's mansion. Once that simple conference room was completed, they sat down one by one.

Then, I'll sit next to Kanami-san.

Maria sat next to me before anyone else, as if she was aiming for where I sat. Then she casually pulls her chair closer. As if to counter that, Dia takes a seat next to the opposite seat.

...... Then this is me.

'So, I'm late to the party ......!　Ugh, then I think I'll put it next to Dear this time. ...... eh, heh. Dia, can I hold your hand?

Snow sits down and indulges her best friend, who has recently become a good friend.

Dea reluctantly agrees, saying, ”I can't help it,” but I know that Dea herself is quite the friend-dependent person.

And Rustyala, who watches their smiling appearance with tenderness, takes the next seat.

'Well, I'll be next to Maria, then. Of course, we'll stick our chairs together!

Yeah, go ahead.

We're pretty close here too. The relationship from the time we met is now being built up, not unilaterally, but because we both want it to be.

Then, the lost Reaper speaks up, a little flustered.

''Eh?　Hmm, I'll be right here.　No, it doesn't matter where it is, though.

In that strange vein, the Reaper sat down next to Snow, squeezing his seat together.

...... peace.

They are really close enough to forget that they were killing each other just a few moments ago. Lagune saw the switch in the members of the group and sat down normally next to Rustyala with a bitter smile, and finally, Ryner, with Yotaki in tow, sat in the two extra seats.

Ryner checks his surroundings and speaks with the same reassuring look on his face as I do.

''I'm really surprised ....... Before you know it, you're getting along pretty well. All over here and there. I guess the whole ...... thing is just a groundless fear of mine. Well, if you've been working together for a long time, you'll naturally become close. We all make the same mistakes, have the same interests, and have the same dreams .......

Ryner says that it is natural that the length of our relationship is proportional to how close we are to each other. Me and Ragne react to that theory at the same time - with our faces turned away and sweat dripping from our faces.

''Eh, ah, yeah. That's right: ......''

Yeah, I guess so.

To be frank, we both have completely opposite views. If you party with a large group of people for a long time, cracks will inevitably appear, and we believe that there is no such thing as a mixed-gender bond.

Because of that mindset, me and Ragne were somewhat suspicious of our friends. I didn't trust the bond between the four of us - Rustyala, Dia, Maria and Snow.

The fact that Lagune and I, with such a personality, nodded without denying it now, is a sign of our determination to live positively from now on. We've just decided that from now on we will both live positively.