Chapter 143 - My SI Stash #43 - Metallovers Self-Insert Adventure Book 1 - The Insertening by metallover (Fire Emblem) (2/2)

The prince, for by now I was sure he was the real deal, glanced up over the stall for a moment before his head ducked back down.

”Military, possibly middle-ranks,” he answered.

I nodded, glancing around the stall again.

”If Frederick doesn't take him down in his initial pass I need you to take him out,” I whispered back.

”Pretty free with the orders, aren't you?” Chrom chuckled, his face betraying his good spirits.

”Hey mate, you're the one with actual military training,” I defended myself. ”I was only taught self-defence; that guy's way the f_u_c_k outta' my league. I can handle a few of the other ones, but this is going to be all you and frowny-mac-armour-pants.”

Besides, I had an unfair advantage. I'd played Awakening before, so I knew for a fact that at least one of these guys had to be a guerrilla fighter from Plegia. No way could I take a trained killer with my beginner-level katas and a broken farming implement.

Chrom nodded, silent now. We could both hear the sound of hooves beating against dirt, and as the bandits caught the sound and began to turn Frederick exploded into the square.

”For Ylisse!” he roared, running down one of the bandits as the rest dove clear.

”Now!” I shouted, urging Chrom into action as I bolted around the stall. ”For Pony!”

… What? I've always wanted to use that line. Sue me.

Chrom overtook me easily, dashing forwards and spinning, practically slicing the leader-bandit's arm off as he passed, the man going back down. Then he was in amongst the other bandits, swinging Falchion in great arcs.

One of the men rose up in front of me, and I gripped my makeshift staff the way we'd been taught during class. Of course, this stick was far too thin, and the bandit's first blow damn near cleaved it in two. I dodged around the bandit, bringing the low end of my staff up and knocking his axe up to deliver a kick to his gut. There was no power behind the blow, though, and we both stumbled backwards. I growled at him, darting in again and levelling the staff like a lance. The bandit panicked, swinging his axe wildly, and with a grunt I sacrificed my hold on my stick to disarm the bandit. Following my momentum I brought a fist down on the man's nose, smashing both it and my knuckles in the process. He fell backwards, and I kicked out at his knee, harder this time, my steel cap earning a sickening crack as his joint was dislocated.

In that time Chrom had already dealt with his two bandits, and Frederick was circling around for another pass. It looked like my plan had gone off without a hitch until Lissa screamed.

I spun, cursing internally for forgetting how the script played out.

”Get off! Get off me!” she shouted, batting ineffectually at the bandit leader with his one good arm wrapped around her.

”Shut up!” he roared, swinging his useless wounded arm around as he pressed his axe's blade to Lissa's cheek.

He looked up at Chrom and Frederick and ignoring me, breathing erratically as blood-loss started to take effect.

”Okay, so here's how this'll work,” he grunted, dragging Lissa back a few more paces. ”She's gonna heal me arm. Then, I'm takin' her with me as insurance, and if either of you even twitch at me, she becomes a whole lot less pretty!”

Lissa's eyes widened at the threat, the axe blade pressing into her flesh a little harder now.

”Foul knave!” Frederick shouted, bringing his horse around and preparing to charge again.

Chrom stopped him with an arm outstretched, glaring daggers at the bandit.

”Counter-proposal,” I said, breathing heavier than I remembered as the adrenaline faded. ”She heals you, then you take me as a hostage. I'll go quietly, just let her go.”

”Ben, wait-” Chrom started before I cut him off with a look.

I got this, my look said.

”Well?” I growled at the bandit. ”You're about to bleed out. I'd think a little f_u_c_k_i_n_g faster if I were you, or you'll just end up dead anyway.”

The bandit swayed a little on his feet, shaking his head a little before nodding assent.

”Go ahead Lissa,” I urged the girl.

Lissa nodded, bravely blinking back her tears and holding her staff up. The wound on the bandit's arm closed, and he flexed his hand a little before releasing his hold on Lissa and foolishly rushing me, clearly intending to kill me and take Lissa hostage anyway.

Which was exactly what I'd been hoping he'd do.

Grinning with confidence and malice that I honestly had no idea the source of, I stepped into his charge and brought my forehead down on his face, Jack Reacher style. Stars danced before my vision again and I'm pretty sure I blacked out a little, but I managed to keep my faculties about me long enough to send the bandit sprawling with another right hook for good measure.

”Ow…” I muttered, holding my bruised forehead with what I was sure was a broken hand and stumbling backwards.

I felt a breeze on my shoulder now, and looked at the new red hole in my shirt. Apparently I'd acted too slowly and the bandit's attack had gotten to me when I'd come at him. So, in addition to my splitting headache, I was bleeding again. Which is, of course, never a good thing.

Chrom and Frederick both rushed past me to where Lissa had collapsed, staring at the unconscious bandit leader with wide, teary eyes.

”I'm fine, by the way!” I called after them, falling backwards into a sitting position. ”Not… bleeding or concussed or anything. I'll just sit here. Injured. Ow.”

Chrom looked over his shoulder and laughed, shaking his head as he said something to Lissa. I was starting to drift in and out of consciousness at that point, so I couldn't really catch what anyone around me was saying. However, I had learned an important lesson: just because some guy in a book can headbutt everything that moves without so much as losing a brain-cell doesn't mean I could, too. Honestly, at that moment I was pretty sure I had just forgotten how to math.

Lissa gave a nod and climbed to her feet with Frederick's assistance before rushing over to my side. She held her staff over me again and shut her eyes, and I instantly felt my headache beginning to fade.

By the time she was done I was back on my feet and back to feeling totally out of place.

”Er… thank you… for saving me,” Lissa mumbled, looking down before she stepped back to let Chrom through.

Her sheer moé-levels almost gave me another asthma attack then and there, but I managed to hold it in and give her a small smile in response.

”Your fighting style is unique,” Chrom said with a grin, interrupting my moment with his sister. ”It's obviously not one made for war, though. Where did you say you were from?”

”Kansas,” I deadpanned, knowing that no one present would get the Wizard of Oz reference.

Chrom blinked as I sighed.

”I'm from someplace far away from here,” I explained. ”I don't know if I can get back, and before anyone says anything: yes, that guy is most definitely a Plegian guerrilla.”

I ended my statement by pointing to the unconscious and bleeding bandit lying face up on the stones, desperately trying to change the subject.

”I was… just about to say that…” Frederick mumbled, looking down at me.

”How do you…?” Chrom started before I shrugged.

If I was going to be stuck here like I thought I was, I'd have to ham it up. I'd have to take Robin's place until he turned up, or I f_u_c_k_e_d things up so royally I got dead. Fortunately, the storyline of Awakening was rather simple, so I didn't doubt I could get it that wrong if things stayed at this difficulty level.

”What can I say? I'm kind of a tactician,” I said with confidence I really did not feel.

Honestly, as familiar with Fire Emblem as I was, literally the only other strategy games I'd played were Valkyria Chronicles and 40k Squad Command. Fortunately, though, if this really was like a video game I had all that prior knowledge of Awakening's gameplay mechanics and script and…

At that point a thought occurred to me. I knew the plot of the story. I knew the exact plot of the story, like the back of my hand after writing gratuitous amounts of fan-fiction for it.

I… I would be unstoppable.

I WAS A GOD. I WAS OMNIPOTENT. I WAS-

”An incredibly foul-mouthed tactician,” Frederick grumbled, crossing his arms and bringing me back to reality.

”What can I say?” I chuckled and shrugged, grinning. ”I grew up in a rough neighbourhood.”

”Well, you risked your life standing beside us today,” Chrom said with another easy grin. ”Is there any way we can repay you?”

I stood there for a moment, lost in thought and ignoring the way that some of the braver villagers were beginning to peek out of the church.

I needed to get them to take me back to Ylisstol with them. On the road when we were attacked by Risen would be when Chrom makes up his mind to take Robin on as the tactician, so that's what I had to make happen. I'd already royally f_u_c_k_e_d up my entrance, though, so it was time to get creative.

”I need maps if I want to get home,” I said after a pause. ”Not of Ylisse. Of everything. The entire world. And access to someone familiar with teleportation magic and theory, too.”

I hoped that had sounded as smart out loud as it did in my head, and judging from the impressed looks on everyone's faces, it had worked.

”We… have some maps you can look at back in Ylisstol,” Chrom offered. ”And there may be a mage there that can help you.”

I nodded, Chrom no doubt referring to Miriel.

”Can… you bring me there?” I asked sheepishly. ”I wasn't kidding before when I said I was lost.”

This was apparently funny, judging from the way Chrom burst into laughter.

”We were just on our way back, so why not?” he said once his laughter had died down.

Around us now the villagers seemed to be getting a handle on the fire, meaning we wouldn't be needed here. I glanced up as an old man, obviously the elder if I was remembering the game's story correctly, approached us.

”Milords! Milords!” the old man said, straight from the game script. ”Please milords, we're a simple village, but we would be honoured to host you tonight! Give us a few hours and we can have a royal feast prepared for you all as thanks!”

Fredrick shook his head. ”While we appreciate the offer, we really must continue on to our destination with all due haste.”

Lissa, however, had other plans; straight from the script.

”Dark meat for me, please, medium-well done, no salt in the soup… Wait, Fredrick, what?”

I snickered along with Chrom, watching the real-life comedy unfolding in front of me. It was one thing to read the speech on a screen, but it was an entirely different matter watching Lissa's crestfallen face as she realised she'd be camping again.

I was, and still am, a firm believer in schadenfreude. What? I have Germanic roots.

”While we cannot join your feast, perhaps there is something you can do for our courageous friend here,” Chrom said, placing another hand on my shoulder.

I had to try very hard not to twitch. I really, really didn't like being touched.

”Anything, milord, anything,” the elder said, bowing.

”Clothes, I assume?” I asked the blue-haired prince over my shoulder.

Chrom grinned and nodded.

”Alright then,” I said, pulling at my ruined shirt. ”I'll need a new shirt, and a jacket or something to go over it if I'm going to be travelling again.”

Another thought occurred to me as I glanced down at my bruised knuckles.

”And… farming gloves,” I said, looking back up at the village elder with a confident grin. ”Big, thick-ass leather gloves if you have them.”

Chrom, Lissa and Frederick gave me a questioning glance as the elder rushed off to collect the clothes for me. I shrugged, wordlessly holding up my bruised hands.

Chrom nodded knowingly, grinning a little as Lissa went back to pestering Frederick about staying the night. It was quite possibly the cutest thing I'd ever seen, but if she ever pestered me like that I'd lose my shit in twenty-seconds flat.

The elder returned quickly, holding a bundle of cloth which I assumed were my new clothes.

”Here you are, milord,” he said, bowing his head and offering me up the clothes.

”I'm no-one's lord, mate,” I laughed, pulling the rags that had once been my favourite shirt off over my head.

The plain linen shirt he gave me was way, way too big, but it was better than walking around half-n_a_k_e_d, so I pulled it on over my head and gave the elder a grateful nod.

”I have the gloves and coat you asked for, too, sir,” the old man said, holding out more clothes. ”The finest in the village! A thank you for saving us.”

The gloves were perfect; they reached halfway up to my elbows, were thick enough to offer my knuckles a modic_u_m of protection when I started hitting things, and…

A black coat.

A knee-length black-dyed woollen coat was presented to me as well. Taking the garment I let out a laugh, pulling it on over my new shirt and tucking the gloves into a pocket.

Apparently the universe really did want me to play Robin's part.

F_u_c_k you, universe, I cursed mentally, grinning as I brushed invisible dust off my new lapels in a small show for my three new traveling companions.

That evening we all sat around the campfire, and I was quiet as I tried to process what had happened that day, the haunch of bear in my hands going ignored and uneaten as it cooled.

Point one: I was inside a video game, ala Legend of Neil. Except this was a lot less funny so far.

Point two: I was supposedly a tactician and, if things were going the way I thought they were, I was about to get my first job over here. That being said, given my track record with jobs in the last year I'd only have it for a short time, but hopefully I could find out how to get home before that.

Point three: I had killed at least two dudes today, maybe more. With zero consequences. In fact, I had been rewarded for it. And I did not know how to feel about that. I was still confused. I would liken the feeling to the first time you get laid. Did that really happen? Was that really me? Did I really do that? That kind of feeling.

”Er… Ben?” Chrom said kindly from across the fire. ”Are you alright? You're not eating. It really doesn't taste as bad as Frederick and Lissa make out.”

I glanced up, looking at the two concerned and one suspicious face looking at me. Right, right… Robin's meant to be stuffing his face at this point. I grinned as I took a huge bite out of the meat. I actually liked gamey meat; I was a huge fan of deer and kangaroo, and bear actually wasn't that different. Tastes like shit, but the texture is similar.

”It's pretty good,” I said once I'd swallowed, trying not to laugh at the horrified faces Frederick and Lissa were making.

”See?” Chrom said in that familiar older brother tone to Lissa. ”You're just far too delicate to enjoy a robust flavour like this.”

The blonde woman huffed, moving over to where I was sitting in the dirt and crouching down at my side.

”Ignore my brother, I am not delicate,” she grumbled as Frederick and Chrom began to talk about something on the other side of the fire. ”Now lift up you shirt and let me check where I healed you earlier.”

I nodded, remembering that clerics weren't just mages; they were full-blown healers. Or at least I wrote them as such, anyway.

”He doesn't mean anything by it,” I assured the girl as I shrugged my coat off.

Lissa scoffed as she yanked my shirt up, gently prodding at my ribs with her fingertips.

”How would you know?” she asked distractedly.

”Because I have two baby-brothers, too,” I shrugged.

Not that I knew then if I'd ever see them again, but hey; I'd lived with both of them for twenty years, so I had the experience at the very least.

”Really?” Lissa asked, moving to check my shoulder. ”Are they jerks too?”

I let out an involuntary laugh, making Lissa draw back and give me a funny look.

”No, I'm the oldest so I'm kinda the jerk,” I chuckled, lowering my shirt again.

”Great,” Lissa deadpanned, giving my shoulder one last prod before moving back to sit at my side.

”Don't worry,” I assured her. ”If he's anything like me he's just being a d_i_c_k to show his love. Us guys are a complicated sort.”

We sat in silence for a little while, me trying to work out my thoughts while unconsciously eating the meat still in my hand, and Lissa no doubt ruminating on the day, too.

I kept coming back to the fact that I'd killed a man. Two men, at least, I reminded myself. I'd ended two lives, and I simply reasoned it away as them being NPCs. Even though this wasn't a game, even though this was real-life, I still told myself that the men I'd killed were NPCs. And it helped.

Now all I had to worry about was getting home. Until I figured out something better, I would simply go with the game's story. Naga has the power to transport people dimension to dimension, so I assumed my best bet would be getting up to the point where we would meet here.

Right at end-game, three years from that point in the forest. Damn. So much for that plan…

But… Did I really want to go home?

”Tell us about where you're from,” Chrom said across the fire, cutting into my thoughts again.

”Yeah!” Lissa agreed excitedly. ”I wanna hear about your hometown!”

Alarm bells started ringing in my head, making me wonder just how much I could tell them.

”It's…” I started, groping for the right words. ”Hot. Tropical where I live; there's lots of rainforest a few hours north, lots of green and water. It's a really beautiful place, to tell the truth. I'm really lucky I live there. But if you travel for a few hours inland it gets dry and dusty. And even hotter. The people are… well, like people everywhere. There are some nice ones and some assholes.”

Lissa and Chrom both nodded, enraptured.

”What's it called?” Frederick asked coldly.

”Australia,” I shrugged. ”It's an island nation in the south. I doubt it's even on any of your maps.”

Frederick scoffed, unimpressed.

”How'd you get here, then?” Lissa asked curiously.

”I honestly have no idea,” I shrugged, hamming it up again. ”Hence why I want to travel to Ylisstol and figure some things out. I'm totally lost.”

”Yet you seem to have a fair amount of knowledge of the surrounding area,” Frederick grunted.

”Enough with the interrogation, Frederick,” Chrom sighed. ”I… believe his story. I don't know why, but I feel like we can trust him.”

”I ain't getting home unless you trust me,” I added, grinning at Frederick. ”So if you guys ever need an extra set of hands, I'm down for whatever.”

Chrom blinked at me for a moment before grinning.

”I assume that was an offer of aid should we need it?”

”Yeah, let's go with that,” I sighed, running a hand over my stubble again. ”Just ignore my regional slang.”

”I like it!” Lissa said suddenly. ”It's really interesting! But I still can't figure out what 'f_u_c_k' means.”

I choked a little on my bear, coughing at the sight of such an innocent girl saying such a serious profanity.

”Okay, firstly that is a serious curse word and you should never say it. Ever. On the hierarchy of swears where I come from, it's tied at number two,” I told her quickly. ”Secondly, owing to its versatility it is also my favourite word.”

Lissa's eyes went wide as she clapped her hands over her mouth, Chrom and Frederick bursting into laughter at the sight.

”So… what does it mean?” a red-faced Lissa asked sheepishly once the other two stopped laughing.

”Do you really want to know?” I asked, taking another bite of my rapidly dwindling bear.

Lissa nodded. I looked up to Chrom, who shrugged helplessly, grinning like a bastard.

”Short answer is that it means 'i_n_t_e_r_c_o_u_r_s_e'. Long answer is… well, sit back and let me explain to you the magic of how one word can be a noun, adjective, verb and adverb all at once!” I declared, downing the rest of my bear all in one go to free up my hands for explanation.

I loved giving this lecture.

Later that night I sat with my back against a tree, looking out over our small campsite and pretending to sleep. I knew what was coming, and with a certain level of excitement was sitting, waiting for Chrom to get up for his walk.

Lucina was coming, and I was ready to squeal like a Hiddleston-fangirl at Comic-Con.

Still, though, I was wondering how in the hell I was going to get home. Not that home held any particular allure for me. In fact, if things went well here, I kind of wanted to stay. Back IRL I didn't have a lot going for me, to be honest. Crap jobs, debt up to my eye-balls, half-finished degree which had been that way for a lot longer than it should have… But here, I could be the Shepherds' tactician. I could be Robin, save the world, kick some serious a_s_s, and get with my pick of whichever Awakening waifu I wanted! I had all my favourite girls' support conversations memorised, anyway, so all I had to do was keep an eye out for the right flags. But… I'd only get one play-through. I had to choose carefully, or I'd screw up, or worse, get stuck with a wife that didn't actually compliment my… abrasive personality. So Olivia was probably out. So was, to a lesser extent, Cordelia. I drank, swore, and showed a total lack of respect for any and all authority. That probably wouldn't go down well with either of them. Sumia… I'd rather see shipped with Chrom. Lissa I could see doing, but… I'd really rather not marry into royalty if I was going to hang around. Too many rules. Tharja was a great fall-back plan, though. She was supposed to worship the ground I walked on, right? Plus, to quote Harvest Scramble's script, she was the 'boingiest' in the army. I found myself pointedly ignoring her more yandere-traits then as I fantasized.

Right, I decided. I'm going to play the Tharja route!

…

I stopped at that point, reflecting on the fact I was mixing digital and real-life up again. This was going to become a seriously bad habit if I wasn't careful.

I snorted, snapping back to wakefulness as I realised that I had drifted off during my thoughts of routes and flag rising. Chrom and Lissa were already wandering off into the forest, which meant it was almost show-time.

”Hey,” I whispered to Frederick.

The big knight let out a soft snore, ignoring me and rolling onto his side. I glanced over my shoulder, and sure enough Chrom and Lissa had already disappeared into the dark forest.

”Frederick, wake the f_u_c_k up, bro,” I whispered a little louder this time.

The ground shook a little, the trees swaying overhead.

Already!? I wondered, throwing subtlety to the wind as I pulled my new gloves on.

”Frederick, wake. The f_u_c_k. Up!” I shouted, giving the knight's armoured back a good kick for emphasis.

Frederick shot to a sitting position as the earth started to quake again, and I fell flat on my arse. He looked at me with a gambit of expressions playing across his face before finally settling on mild irritation mixed with concern for his charges.

”Where are-”

”In the forest!” I cut him off, climbing to my feet before pulling him to his. ”Get your b_u_t_t on that horse and find them! Now!”

He nodded, once again his sense of duty to Chrom and Lissa no doubt saving me from getting my teeth punched in for being a rude prick, and leapt up into his saddle. He cast one look at me before urging his horse over in my direction, the charger calm despite the shaking and the smell of smoke that was starting to reach us.

”Get on,” he said simply.

”I… how?”

Frederick rolled his eyes, grabbing me by the scruff and dropping me behind him. I squirmed around a bit, trying to get comfortable before he dug his heels in and we were off. I'm not ashamed to say that I was nervous for being on a horse for the first time, but it wasn't as bad as I expected. Until the horse jumped a fallen log I didn't see in time to brace for, and my balls were crushed beneath me, anyway.

”Argh, f_u_c_k this horse shit!” I shouted behind Frederick, much to the Knight's apparent amus_e_m_e_nt.

F_u_c_ker knew that would happen and was laughing his a_s_s off at that point.

Before I could consider how best to get my revenge we came out into the clearing where Chrom, Lissa and holy-crap-balls-YES! Lucina-Marth were fighting Risen.

Chrom and 'Marth' killed the last one as we arrived, the time-traveler giving us a shocked glance before disappearing into the trees.

”Prepare to sortie!” I shouted, jumping off Frederick's absurdly high horse. ”I'll be right back!”

”Ben, where are you… wait, where's the man…” Chrom asked, looking around the clearing in confusion before I disappeared into the forest after Lucina.

I pushed my way through the undergrowth, rushing in the direction I'd seen her go. Once I was sure I was far enough away I finally let my grin out and spun around in a circle.

”Oh Princess!” I called out in a sing-song voice. ”I know you're here, I know your secret, and I want your he~elp. ”

There was no answer, and I shrugged.

”Princess! Lucina!” I shouted, my voice still light.

It was at that point that a scowling Lucina-Marth, parallel-Falchion in hand, stepped out from behind a tree to glare at me from behind her mask.

”How do you know-” she started, her manner very threatening before I cut her off.

”Later,” I said, stepping towards her and, despite my better judgement, into her striking zone. ”Right now, I want your help defending your father and Aunt from the Risen. Skinny a_s_s front and center, woman. Now.”

”How…” she breathed, her voice becoming much more feminine as her Marth persona dropped.

”I'm a prophet, I'm a genius, call me whatever,” I snapped. ”Risen incoming. Come back with me, help me fight, and then we'll talk. Okay? Trust me, I'm apparently here for the same reason you are.”

Lucina proceeded to stare at me for a moment before nodding woodenly.

”Good, this way,” I said, spinning on my heel, dashing back out to the forest clearing.

A clearing that was now swarming with Risen.

”Holy crap where did all these guys come from!?” I shouted, skidding on my heels.

”They always move in packs,” Lucina-Marth stated, her voice deeper again as she stepped out behind me.

At that point I figured it would just be easier to think of them as two completely different people.

”That was… not fun,” I gasped, hands on my knees as I s_u_c_k_e_d in air like a drowning man.

”Pfft. Pansy,” Sully, having shown up earlier with Virion right on cue, said scornfully.

I flipped her the bird, a hand gesture whose meaning was obviously lost on her, before finally drawing myself back up to my full height.

”Are you well, my newest friend?” Virion asked me, his weird speech already starting to piss me off.

They had come in out of nowhere, plugging the hole in our flank I had purposely left open. Much to everyone else's amazement. I think, judging from the looks I was getting from Chrom and Lissa, that I was in as the Shepherds' tactician. And, judging from the way that 'Marth' kept staring at me, she believed me now, too.

”I'm fine, Ruffles,” I said, doing my best to slow my breathing and trying out the fan-favourite nickname I'd always wanted to.

”Ruffles?” Virion repeated in a hurt tone while the others around him snickered at his expense.

”Are you okay?” Lissa asked in a kind voice, hurrying to my side. ”Is it your lungs again?”

I nodded, grinning at being fussed over by such a cute girl.

”Alas, I race to the rescue and am spurned and scorned while the newcomer is treated as a king among commoners by the most beauteous of princesses!” Virion lamented loudly, theatrically holding his hand to his brow.

I went to retort something, my words lost in the wheeze that followed before I started coughing.

”He has weak lungs,” Lissa snapped irritatedly. ”And yet he still fought alongside us, while someone m_o_a_n_e_d the other day they wanted to rest their tired feet rather than go on patrol!”

I couldn't help but grin as Virion cleared his throat awkwardly and muttered something, shuffling away in defeat. Lissa, who could apparently be quite the bad-ass herself when she wanted to be, pressed another vulenary vial into my hands, which I uncorked with my teeth and downed in one go, the thick liquid almost making me gag.

Once I finished I took a deep, shuddering breath and looked down at Lissa appreciatively.

”Thanks, Princess,” I said, stepping around her. ”I'll make it up to you later. Why don't we go and save your brother from the awkwardness over there?”

Lissa nodded and giggled a little bit, falling in at my shoulder and following me to where Chrom and 'Marth' were awkwardly staring at each other.

”Hey-hey-hey,” I greeted them. ”What's crackin?”

”What?” Chrom asked, tilting his head curiously.

”It means 'hello, what's going on',” I explained with a sigh.

”I was just speaking to…” Chrom started, trailing off when he realised that he didn't know the stranger's name.

”You may call me Marth,” Lucina said, her voice pitched low.

I grinned as the scene from the game played out before me, almost exactly word for word. However there was a change from the usual script as she stepped up to me.

”I would speak with you in private now, tactician,” she said to me, practically dragging me off into the forest.

”Argh, hey, easy!” I complained, struggling to keep my exhausted feet beneath me.

Lissa and Chrom exchanged confused glances as they watched the stranger drag me off, but made no move to help after I gave them the universal 'everything is okay' symbol that is the thumbs-up. They watched us disappear with worry etched on their faces until I lost sight of them in the trees.

As Lucina dragged me into the forest a few of the other Shepherds glanced up curiously when we passed. We went deep into the forest, stopping only when we could no longer hear the voices of the others.

”This far enough yet?” I asked, annoyance clear in my tone as I readjusted my new coat.

”Explain yourself,” she demanded, her voice reverting back to its usual feminine timbre as she rounded on me. ”Who are you? How do you know the things you do?”

”Will you relax already?” I sighed, gingerly pulling off my gloves. ”I already told you I'm on your side.”

I hissed as the rough gloves brushed my brutalised knuckles; apparently hitting things repeatedly left your fists raw and bruised. Who would have guessed? For some weird reason the vullenaries didn't go as far as my hands, either.

”That is not good enough,” Lucina insisted, her hand dropping to her sword. ”You will answer me directly. Now.”

I rolled my eyes, recalling that I was speaking to yet another member of the nobility. Deciding that, with her knowledge of time-travel this wouldn't be too hard for her to swallow, I opted for total disclosure.

”You're from the future, yeah?” I asked, to which Lucina woodenly nodded. ”Well, I'm apparently from a different world altogether.”

I waited to see how she handled that information, however she scoffed and crossed her arms.

”Preposterous,” she said.

”How is that weirder than traveling back in time?” I asked with a shrug. ”Believe me or don't, I don't really care. But I have a sneaking suspicion that the only way for me to get home is through Grima.”

Obviously this had startled Lucina, as she s_u_c_k_e_d a quick breath in and dropped her arms.

”How do you…?”

”I already told you,” I g_r_o_a_n_e_d. ”I know everything. Now, do me a favour and go to Regna Ferox. Beat Lon'qu, become Basilio's champion for Western Regna Ferox in the tournament.”

Lucina quirked her head in much the same way her father had.

”What? Why would I do that?” she asked, confused.

”Trust me,” I assured her. ”There's an order to these things. Just go do it and things will work out fine.”

”How do I know that you're not simply trying to get me away from my Father's side to murder him yourself?” she asked suspiciously.

”Because without him I'm not getting home!” I snapped, my temper getting the better of me.

It had been a long day; I'd killed at least three people, been stabbed, chopped and beaten; not to mention I hadn't slept yet and the fact that the vulenary I'd just drank didn't seem to be working on my fists very fast…

Apparently I hadn't yet decided if I was going to stay here, either.

Lucina reeled from my abrupt change in tone, surprised by the viciousness of my voice.

”Sorry,” I mumbled, running a hand over my bald head. ”It's… been a long day.”

Lucina nodded, looking around before reaching up and taking off her mask.

”I… understand,” she said, looking at me with piercing blue eyes. ”But I do not know if I can trust you.”

”I need you,” I said openly, without preamble. ”Without you or your father, I'm not getting home and this, all of this, falls to pieces. Trust me, please.”

Lucina's eyes widened a little at my plea, but she nodded.

”I sense no malicious intent in your words,” she said after a moment. ”But…”

”Tag along until Ylisstol if you want, then,” I shrugged. ”You're going to interfere with the timeline anyway, so you may as well come with us for a while.”

She gave me a strange, penetrating look for a moment before placing her mask back on over her eyes and shaking her head.

”I will secretly shadow your group until you reach the Capital,” she declared, her voice returning to the lower pitch of her Marth persona.

”Whatever,” I sighed, giving up and turning to walk back to the others. ”If you get hungry come find me. I'll share my rations with you, at the least.”

Lucina nodded, watching as I brushed through the forest back towards the rest of the Shepherds. Hopefully I could get a few hours sleep in before we moved out… I was beat.