Chapter 96 - The Phoenix Emperors Grandson-in-Law (1/2)

In a great, verdant forest floated hundreds of crisp leaves. They swirled gently, gracefully, upon cool waves of air. You could hear the soft rustle as they passed, and then nothing. It would turn quiet. Too quiet. Eerily quiet…

Now.

An unexpected explosion of sound, a burst of activity. All of a sudden a dozen bladed wooden stars descended from above.

The intruder's sensitive ahoge shook with terror as her body was outlined in sharp and strange weaponry. Not a single edge touched her, but had I willed it that would have changed.

” What do you want?” My gravelly voice echoed throughout the land. It seemed to emanate from the forest itself.

”Y-Young Master, please! You've been out here for three days already! Everyone's worried!” The girl croaked out.

A murder of crows dropped from tree branches and converged. They morphed together, quickly forming a tall figure robed in black. Numerous red cloud patterns adorned the cloth. They shimmered faintly, and the sway from the wind gave an illusion of movement to them that was somehow both dreadful and mesmerizing.

”Leave me, Baz.” I turned my eyes to the cliff to my right where the morning sun bathed me in splendorous light. I schooled my face to a brooding, apathetic thoughtfulness. ”I'm a ninja now.”

”Ninja? Huh? I don't understand...and what's up with your eyes?”

”I had Evie teach me illusion techniques,” I explained and shot him a hard glance.

I had found her in one of the secret passages she uses to spy on me after hearing soft snores in the wood. Bubbles had been scared silly thinking there was a ghost in the house. Poor kid must've had a Weed Adventure from all the smoke and been unable to find her way out.

”Careful.” I warned. ” I can't control them well yet. Stare too long and all that awaits is a hell of shackles and stakes.”

”I...what?” Her face twisted. ”Honestly, I don't get anything you're saying at all!”

A chuckle. ”Let's hope you never do.”

”...Well, whatever, I don't care. Are you coming back soon or not?” She narrowed her eyes. I was struck with an analytic gaze. ”No, forget it...you're coming back even if I have to make you! I'll pay you back for everything you've done!”

”By yourself?” A derisive shake of the head. ” Fool. You're too weak to make me do anything.”

”Oh yeah? Hmph. See how I deal with you then. You motherf.u.c.k.i.n.g--”

”Please, let's not bring Mary into it.”

A pregnant pause. ” What's my mother have to do with this?” She asked warily.

”It's too late, Baz. I've already f.u.c.k.i.e.d her.”

I could see the wheels in her head make an abrupt stop. The cogs jerked and twitched attempting to process the new information.

”I did tell you that you'd make a great son. You'll make an even better daughter.”

The shock was so great she promptly fell to her knees and cradled her head. ”No...it can't be...that's...no...NO!” She agonized. ”Bastard. I'll kill you. I swear I'll--!”

I knelt down and lifted her chin. ”Foolish little sister. If you wish to kill me, then hate me, detest me, curse me, and survive in an unsightly way. Run, run and cling to your pitiful life.”

”Young Master!” He snarled. ”So….um….are we done now?”

I gave him a thumbs up. ”Yup. That was grade-A acting right there, Basmina. You really get me. Alright, I'll come back.”

”Heh, good. I almost didn't know what to do this time.” Baz, having long since having to put up with these little acts of mine whenever the mood took me, wasn't one to miss my cues.

” It's a damn pain trying to make Jutsu anyway. ”

[You do not meet the requirements to create this skill]

The f.u.c.k.i.n.g system had been c.o.c.kblocking my jutsu-making attempts for as long as I'd been here. I just barely got the crow thing to work. It was nice camping out, though. I hadn't it quite some time. Hunting beasties and roasting them over a fire, foraging for nature's herbs. Staring up at the stars. Was fun.

”By the way, what happened here? The trees….those flowers...just passing through here I saw a lot of knocked-out animals being eaten by the roots! I almost got knocked out myself!”

Ha! So did I. Damn things reminded me of that other flower I found at that Uncle of mine's place. Least that one didn't try to eat me.

”Let's just say Advent of a World of Flowering Trees didn't quite come out as I expected.” I scratched my cheek guiltily.” Nevermind that.” I made sure to put up ”BEWARE--MAN-EATING TREES” signs all over the place. Baz must just not have seen them.

Speaking of man-eating trees, I was starting to miss Vee and Mary. I was so enthusiastic over trying to create new moves that I forgot to look for Vee, Dolly, Charlotte and Sera. I'm sure they're able to take care of themselves, especially Sera and Vee--and since Vee took Dolly when she left I wasn't worried overmuch about her either--but I'd still like to know what happened to them.

I did ask about Charlotte from Baz but all I got in response was, ”Our differing ideals about the future of the organization led to an unfortunate split.” Which, upon a lot more pestering, I discovered meant Baz wanted Dragon slayers while Charlotte had dreams of Dragon riding.

She thought it would be a lot cooler taming a Dragon than killing one and took half of her followers with her. Not sure how the hell she thought Dragon riding would work out considering there are only a few Dragons she actually knows. Dolly and Mother won't be giving her rides, I'm sure.

And I'm not a taxi service. Also, I'm more Angel right now considering I haven't unlocked the Dragon skin for my wings yet anyway. While I don't mind her riding my back I ain't having rando climbing me for a quick soar across the city, no way.

Still, the two parties went their separate ways and Baz hadn't seen her since.

Really, that kid. First she wants to strike me down for being a Demon King reincarnation(I'm not) and now she wants to tame me to look cool in front of everyone.

Well, I guess I should just be happy she doesn't wanna kill me anymore.

”Nervermind? But--”

”We going or what?” I was already strolling past him. ”Say, has Sera come back to the house yet?”

”Who?”

”Ah. Right. You haven't met her. Eh, nevermind that either.” I waved him off.

He sighed. ”I really don't know how you have the time to just bring more women into the house. It's ridicul--”

”Did you want something?”

”Balls!” Baz jumped back ready to take some names only to find the woman in question, Sera, standing not even five feet away.

”Don't sneak up on people like that.” I admonished, putting away my wooden kunai. Nifty trick, eh? Thanks to Vee giving me Wood Release it was pretty easy to control wood once I tried.

[You have learned the skill 'Wood Manipulation']

Was what the system told me after my first success in creating moving some roots around.

Apparently there was a proficiency system too. It seemed like as I got a better feel for how to control the wood the higher my proficiency became. It slowed down at a certain point and then I discovered that only creating more intricate objects would make the proficiency rise again. But I didn't bother with that because I don't need to master a skill like this anyway.

I did notice it got harder to control bigger wooden objects, and this difficulty increased exponentially the more detailed the creations I made were, but I wasn't gonna be making sculptures.

I found out about the difficulty increase when trying to make a life-sized model of a Gundam. But yeah. Not gonna be trying that again for any reason. Controlling tree trunks and whatnot is likely gonna be all I'm going to be doing in a fight with this skill. Unless there is a reason to increase the proficiency further in the future I'm just going to leave it at the current Intermediate level.

I'm not going to become the Legendary Ironwood Sculptor--or whatever the equivalent would be--anytime soon.

”Sorry.” She apologized. I saw her avoiding my eyes.

”What's wrong?” I asked.

The woman shook her head. ”It's nothing important.”

”Huh. Smells like bullshit, but whatever. Where've you been then?”

Baz stepped in. She waved her hands. ”Hold on a minute, you guys are going to fast! Who the heck is this, Young Master? Don't just leave me out of the loop.”

”Look man, ain't no one tell you to go off on your own hatching plans behind the scenes the last few chapters. Don't blame me if you don't know all the new characters who show up, okay? Look at the glossary.”

”Nevermind. Forget I asked.”

”So?” I turned my attention back to Sera. ”Where the heck have you been then?”

”Resting. I was tired after the fighting so I stayed inside your body to recover.”

Nah. I wasn't having it. Something smelled fishy here and I don't see Bubbles anywhere in sight.

”It took you all this time to do that? I know I give you f.u.c.k tons of energy by letting you live inside me. You can't tell me you were so exhausted after the little scuffle in the living room that you had to sleep for over three days.”

She stiffened. ”That wasn't the fight I was...no. Forget it. It doesn't matter why I was tired, does it? Anyway, tell me what you wanted. You were asking about me for a reason, right? ”

”Right. So it's like this.” I then grabbed Baz's hand.

”Hey, what do you think you're--OH MY GODS LET GO OF ME!” She shrieked. The girl tore her hand out of my grip and blew on it with tears in her eyes. ”Young Master, you're way too hot!”

Ignoring her, I asked, ”So I'm f.u.c.k.i.n.g boiling, apparently, but I don't even feel it. I almost started a forest fire last night. If Smokey was around to see that shit he'd hang his head in disappointment.”

”Hm. Yeah. That's not supposed to happen. Even fire Dragons don't get that hot unless they actively use their powers. Your internal temperature is crazy high. I thought I felt a bit warmer than normal recently...You know, it's probably because of that Phoenix in you.”

I nodded. ”So we're on the same page. I thought so too. What's up with that, anyway? You mentioned it once but never explained.”

”How could I explain? I don't know anything. You're the one who put it in.”

”Phasing.”

”What?”

”Nothing. But no I didn't.”

”Uh, yes. You did. Think harder, it had to come from somewhere. You know any Phoenixes? Maybe you caught it from one of them.”

”Please don't say it like I caught an STD.”

”How do I know you didn't?” She snorted coldly. An amazing feat for such a fiery woman. ”That night…”She trailed off sullenly.

”That night?” I wondered. I then remembered where I'd seen this kind of behaviour before. Shit, I thought. Don't tell me she was tired because she was trying to fight those Angels off of me?

”What night?” Baz inquired.

”Nothing. Just old news.” I waved off his question. I think Sera hated the way I brushed it off because she got noticeably more irritated when I said that. Not surprising considering my family are basically religious figures to her kind. Having me being taken advantage of by a Whore of Angels with her trying and failing to stop it must have really pissed her off. Like someone pissing in her cornflakes. Well, probably a bit angrier than that.

”But yeah I think I know who I have to talk to. Come on, Bazmilla, we're going home. ”

I'm gonna go take a bath and then track me down a spicy chicken.

***

”You seriously kept her like this for three days?” I was fascinated and horrified at the same time. I was looking at a Fae Queen who was collared, leashed and tied to the front deck. Her clothes were ragged and showing splendid alabaster skin. They were also slightly damp. They had apparently been throwing water on her to keep her clean and feeding her pizza, the only thing she craved in her drugged up state during her infrequent bouts of lucidity.

The woman was wrapping herself in a blanket and staring unblinkingly at my rocking chair, giggling to herself periodically.

”She's a Faery Queen! You can't just treat her like some dog.” I protested.

Poor Rhea! My heart bled for her, the poor thing.

”She's too dangerous.” Mary didn't back down at all. ”We had to keep her sedated. Without you here I'm sure she'd have just killed us all. In fact, she would have killed us all even if you were, then kidnapped you. I really don't know if all of us combined could win against her in a direct fight. Even your Mother can't.” She calmly justified. ” And that Sera woman had been missing along with you. WIthout her backup I didn't want to leave the woman in full control of her faculties.”

”Okay. Understandable. What about Mira?”

I heard the front door open. It was the Queen's daughter herself. ”I don't mind.” She smiled. Her pretty, elfin features looked at her mother with a twisted sort of pleasure. ”It's odd seeing her reduced to this state when she's always been such a huge presence, but she did worse things to me and Claude back then. This is just what she deserves, I'm sure.” Not a single bit of reservation entered her eyes.

Damn. That's cold. I get it though. If Mira said it, it had to be true. Plus, yeah, I'm also sure she was a major cunt to a lot of people considering how hostile Mary was being. For being such a mean mother to Mira alone meant she deserved a good thrashing. Sadly I can't give her one, least not when she isn't high as hell. And she's too pitiful to thrash like this.

”Woman's going to be a major coke addict by the time she comes out of this.” I pointed out.

”Maybe.” MIra shrugged.