381 8.9 Paying Taxes In Coppers. It Is Still Money, Isnst It? (2/2)
”Yes... These come from the Mint and no doubt this is legal tender currencies. Could we have them in 308 pieces of gold, Robin? It makes an easier count and safer handling back to the Sheriff.”
”No gold coins. We do not have a single gold or shillings and all we have here are copper coins. Take it or leave it. These are still money, right?”
I mocked the uninvited guests and their vagrant adventurers as the pile of coppers were from our adventurers that paid 2 coppers each for their 3 meals and also from Will.I.Am who exchanged the sales proceeds of the eggs from coppers to gold coins from the loot.
”Hah hah hah... Too bad you fucked with the wrong Robin here. I'm going to make you carry these loads back and make the Sheriff count the coppers himself... Hah hah hah.” I thought inwardly as I cracked a smile at the corner of my mouth as Matilda prepared the fire the moment she noticed the return of Will.I.Am, Alleicea and Aventina.
”Ah... My Lordships has returned. Please... Have some tea first and rest your weary feet.” I went to the trio, did an elegant bow and winked at them. The men at arms and vagrant adventurers were flabbergasted when they saw 3 kids, barely 11 years old, wearing an overcoat and a green paper party crown on their heads complete with 4 coloured gems.
Seeing me bow to them and addressing them as Lordship, all the men at arms and vagrant adventurers rushed forward and dropped to one knee and greeted the 'Lordship' that had arrived at Camp.
”Sir Robin, who are these men and what they want?” asked Will.I.Am as he saw my wink and played along in this charade.
”Oh your Lordship, these men are from the Sheriff's office in Nottingham and are here to collect the monthly taxes and they said that the money you provide them is no good.”
”WHAT...?!? NO GOOD...?!? WHAT DO THEY MEAN THAT ITS NO GOOD?!? IS THE SHERIFF MORE MIGHTIER THAN THE KINGSHIP?!? ”hollered Will.I.Am in a very dramatic tone and the other 2 girls were stifling their giggles and had to be stuffed with food to keep them quiet for a while.
”Yes, your Lordship... They said they prefer gold and shillings rather than these worthless coppers.” I further mocked the men at arms who were now had their heads hung.
”WORTHLESS...?!? THEY MEAN TO SAY THAT THE BROTHER OF OUR FATHER IS W-O-R-T-H-L-E-S-S...?!?” hollered Will.I.Am again and he walked slowly and purposely stepped on the fingers of the men at arms in the front row and went to the table and reached a handful of coppers.
”TELL ME... IS THE BROTHER OF MY UNCLE A WORTHLESS MAN?!?” Will.I.Am said as he slowly trickled the coppers down on top the front row men at arms, further inciting humiliation towards them.
”Hah hah hah... Will.I.Am acting is pretty good. This would scare the shit of these people right away and report that this camp is being occupied by some Lords... Hah hah hah... A slap to the Sheriff's face indeed” I laughed to myself as I cracked another smile across my face.
”N... No...Yo...your Lordship. These coppers are what we are looking forward to collecting from you. I will prepare the receipt for Robin. We don't need to count the coppers, all we all need from you is a small sack to put this away. We will be in our way in a huff.” stammered one of the pale-faced men at arms.
”ITS SIR ROBIN TO YOU, COMMONER. KNOW YOUR PLACE, IMPREGNABLE SOW...” hollered Will.I.Am as he walked back to where I was standing and sat down.
”Yes... Yes... Sir Robin. We understand that now, Your Lordship. We will take our leave and make haste back toNottingham. Thank you for the taxes, I would ask the Sheriff to lower the taxes or immediately exclude it altogether.”
The previously stammering men at arms that sounded like a cockatoo was sweating profusely as he was bending over too close to the fireplace and the heat is burning up his iron breastplate. Hah hah hah... He's going to be one roasted dickhead...!!!
Matilda retrieved a sack with some at the sides of them and threw it across while the men at arms quickly took as they stuffed it with all the copper coins. They bowed to the so-called Lordships and made their way back to Leeds where they would be taking a portal back.
”Alright, Lordship, nice acting by the way. What would your plans for dinner be? Our men would be back soon and they would definitely be hungry and weary after the battle.” I joked at Will.I.Am as he folded the overcoat and places it next to his messenger bags and the row of files.
”Your Lordship here will prepare creamed mashed potato with mushroom gravy. If the men are still hungry, we could have boiled sweet corn afterwards....it would be feast then, fit for a king. Hah Hah Hah... ” suggested Will.I.Am as he and the two girls laughed as they went about to pull the potatoes out from their vegetable ground and prepared the cauldron to boil them.
The mushroom gravy was made up of shitake, round mushroom, fern mushroom and portabello that were harvested, dried on wicker trays and cut up to make a healthy mushroom gravy that goes very well with their creamed mashed potatoes.
Well, as the Lordship had mentioned, the meal would be like a feast and fit for a king, then let it be then. Hah hah hah...