Part 21 (2/2)
After she'd kicked Jesse out, she'd thrown a nice little temper tantrum. Two hours at the gym trying to exhaust her body and a carton of Heath Bar Crunch had only made her angrier. She'd come home and ripped the sheets from the bed to remove all traces of her night with Jesse. Then, when that hadn't made her feel any better, she'd waited until dawn, and called for reinforcements.
She hadn't really felt up to company, but she'd known being around her friends would force her to put on her game face and suck up the hurt. And true friends that they were, Isabel, Bea and Suzi had jumped right out of bed-in Suzi's case, someone else's-and come right over.
She sat with the other women on the floor of her office, sorting through the mess of designs, trim and beading. With a sigh, she scooped up the shredded pieces of her fall design boards. Like her love life, her career was sucking hard.
”I know,” Bea offered, ”Let's spend the day pampering ourselves, then tonight we'll get dressed up, hit a few clubs and see how many hot dudes we can reel in.”
”I thought you were seeing that photographer guy?”
”That wasn't going anywhere,” Bea said. She jingled her wrist, the pale morning sunlight glinting off the diamonds in her bracelet. ”I mean, he was just too clingy and weird. I guess I should let him know it's over, huh?”
Audra groaned. ”Jeez, Bea. You haven't told the guy it's over yet?”
”Nah. I hate hurt feelings. I keep hoping he'll clue in when I don't call him back.”
”That's not fair. If you're going to end it, do it clean.”
”He's a man,” Isabel said with a roll of her eyes. ”It probably serves him right.”
”You're a little on the bitter side, don't ya think?” Suzi asked with a surprised stare.
”I just don't think this guy had any right to let the relations.h.i.+p go as far as the bed,” Isabel insisted, ignoring Suzi's question. ”Men are pigs. Lying left and right just to get a woman into bed.”
”Sure guys lie. So do women, it's not like truth is exclusive to one s.e.x or the other,” Suzi said dismissively. ”The bottom line is, Audra did her dare. It wasn't like she fell for the guy or anything. Right?”
She peered at Audra, her face looking oddly young and almost sweet without its usual polished makeup. Blue eyes Audra knew as well as her own were filled with questions. It wasn't the curiosity that worried Audra, though. It was the sympathy.
”It was good s.e.x,” Audra retorted with a shrug. As long as she forced herself to treat it like any other encounter, she could keep away the pain. ”A little practice and he'd have hit the fabled ten on the o.r.g.a.s.m scale.”
”That good, huh?”
”Yup.”
”It'd be a shame to let go of someone who could toast your buns so perfectly.”
”Let him go? I never had him.” Maybe if she said it enough she'd believe it, too.
”Maybe you should report him,” Isabel mused.
”Why? Do they give medals for s.e.xual prowess? He deserves one, sure, but I don't usually go in for ego strokes, you know?”
”Stop it. You're as bad as Suzi.” Isabel quit straightening and stacking a pile of designs to glare. ”Don't blow this off. Not only did he take advantage of you, you were-are-in danger.”
Done sifting beads, Audra closed the lid of the plastic case. She stared down at the rainbow of gla.s.s shapes until they blurred into a kaleidoscope of running colors. She tried to shove the pain back down, but it was like the lid she'd kept on her emotions for so long, once peeled open, refused to shut.
Finally, she looked up and met Isabel's outraged gaze, her own eyes sheened with tears.
”He didn't take advantage. You know that. Sure, I was a suspect, but he was a dare. Which of us took advantage of the other?”
Isabel pressed her lips together as she considered, then she shook her head.
”But he hurt you,” she said softly. Her own eyes were liquid with sympathy.
”Yeah.” Audra drew in a shuddering breath and tried to shrug. But as hard as she wanted to ignore the pain, it wouldn't go away. ”But it wasn't like he owed me anything. We didn't make any promises, you know?”
”Oh, my G.o.d, will you stop being so d.a.m.ned fair,” Suzi snapped in an abrupt about-face. ”Quit it. I don't give a rat's a.s.s how he was a nice guy, how he was doing his job or how good in bed he is. Isabel's right. None of that excuses him hurting you.”
Walls crumbling, Audra's lip trembled for a brief second before the dam burst and tears poured free. d.a.m.n Jesse, he'd totally ruined her Wicked Chick vow to never cry over a man.
When her friends' faces crumbled too, Audra knew she was done. The tears poured free. The other women sniffed, rubbed her back and gave each other helpless looks. Audra still couldn't stop.
Finally, Isabel got up and went to the kitchen. She came back with a grocery bag. She pulled out sour cream and onion potato chips, pretzels and Doritos, along with a four-pack of wine coolers and a big bag of jelly beans.
”Breakfast of champions,” Bea pointed out.
Even through her misery, Audra had to giggle.
”What? No chocolate?” Suzi asked with a watery laugh of her own.
”No,” Isabel said quietly with a sympathetic look at Audra. ”I'm pretty sure Audra's had enough chocolate.”
Audra eyed the fattening feast spread over the tattered remnants of her designs. ”So much for my Wicked Chick status, huh?”
”What are you talking about?” Bea asked, tearing into the chips.
”This heartbreak over some guy,” Audra specified. ”It's so totally against all the rules. Next thing you know, I'll be whining in an Internet self-help group while eating a pint of Chunky Monkey in my flannel jammies.”
Suzi snorted, but Isabel just stared.
”Since when do Wicked Chicks follow rules?”
Audra frowned, but couldn't think of an answer so she shrugged instead.
”You of all people should know being a bad girl is all about att.i.tude,” Suzi pointed out as she handed Audra the bag of Doritos. ”This c.r.a.ppy one of yours sucks right now. But that's not a permanent thing. More like a temporary breakdown. We're all ent.i.tled to those.”
”Even you?” Isabel teased.
”Sure. But if it were me, I'd lose the flannel. h.e.l.l, all I own in the sleepwear department is Audra's stuff anyway. Even if most of it is sweet and fluffy.”
They all laughed, but Audra had to blink a few times to keep the tears from starting again. For a bada.s.s friend, Suzi was pretty d.a.m.ned wonderful.
”So what are you going to do?” Bea asked around a mouthful of jelly beans.
”Yeah, are you going to go after this guy? Or are you going to trade him in for three guys and a bag of Doritos?
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