Part 22 (1/2)

Chapter 27.

School finally started a couple days later and things began to return to normal, as if half the town hadn't almost lost everything and been living in the gym.

As if I hadn't fallen for Luke Parker, kissed him, and lost him all in twenty-four hours.

Rachel and Jared walked beside me (ok, behind me and oblivious to my presence) toward the senior hall when my heart-the one I thought was broken-stopped. At the Crossroads, the place where the junior and senior halls intersected, the varsity soccer players managed to look like they were lounging while still upright. It wasn't the general milling about that caught my attention, but the dynamics... the very odd dynamics.

I'd expected uncomfortable. I mean, what could have happened after Coach named Chris and Luke co-captains? Granted, Chris kept his spot and Luke was given left-midfield. Coach had said if the team was going to split between them, then the two of them would have to figure out how to hold them together.

The first day of school could mean nothing short of hostility between the two captains. Chris leaned against the locker glaring at Luke. Okay, nothing new there. But it was the reason for the glaring that had me feeling like breakfast wasn't going to stay where I'd put it. Luke paid only half his attention to the notebooks he shoved into his locker, the other half of his attention on Cheryl. The social climbing floozy did everything but climb into his locker to gain his full attention.

Behind me, Rachel and Jared stopped, their whispers dropping away as they watched me watch Luke. Chris's gaze swung my direction as if he knew I was there, as if for once he was more aware of me than anything else. The look he gave me almost finished me off. It wasn't anger at Luke I saw, but pity. Pity for me because Luke wanted so little to do with me that he'd flirt with a girl I knew he didn't even respect. It was so blatantly horrible that even Chris felt bad.

The hall blurred when Luke turned his head, pus.h.i.+ng that floppy brown hair out of his eyes and met my gaze over Cheryl.

Or didn't meet my gaze.

He looked right through me before closing the locker with a tight snick and walking away, Cheryl at his side.

Invisible again.

Every ounce of me wanted to chase them down and make a jerk of myself in front of the entire school. I wanted to pull each strand of pom-pom hair out of her head. I'd make another chance with Luke no matter what. I'd earn another chance with him.

They turned the corner and all I could think was at least that was over. I knew how things were going to go-and it certainly couldn't get worse than that.

Third period English was going to be h.e.l.l. Too many of the major players in the farcical tragedy that had become my life were present. In the center of the room, Luke sat at a desk he barely fit in and watched the doorway until I entered.

That new inner s.p.u.n.k I found when I started seeing what a user Chris was, leapt out again, pus.h.i.+ng me to turn between the desks an aisle early. Luke flipped through his notebook, ignoring the first-day-still-empty pages as I attempted to sashay toward him. I only tripped over one backpack. That was pretty suave for me.

I ran my hand along the edge of his desk, willing him to look up at me. Begging him silently to give me some type of sign. His crooked grin tightened into a straight line. Jaw locked. Eyes straight ahead.

I fought the tears stinging my eyes. English cla.s.s was so not the place to openly weep, no matter how desperately I wanted him back. He was mine for one night, and now I was the thing he hated most in Ridge View.

Settling into a seat at the far side of the room, I stared through the window wis.h.i.+ng I was out there. The pavement under my feet, the wind brus.h.i.+ng my bangs off my face, sweat pus.h.i.+ng everything else from my mind.

That was where we'd end up sitting anyway once seats were a.s.signed, so it made sense to just grab them now. Plus, it was one of the few advantages to being a ”W”. Whalen typically meant I was picked last for everything, but it did let me sit next to the window. That would be the window I could see Cheryl's reflection in behind me. Cheryl who was now leaning against Luke's desk and giggling.

Did she have Amy-Likes-Him radar or something?

OMG. My head swiveled their way against my will. It was worse than I thought. I'd fallen for the next It-boy. Another one. The room was filled with girls throwing covetous glances toward Cheryl. And why not? He was hot (how'd I miss that in the beginning?), kind, funny, smart... stubborn, control-freak.

But I wanted him to be my control-freak.

”Stop staring.”

That was the other good thing about being a W. Rachel Wells. If we'd had different last names, who knows if we would have been such brilliant friends.

”I'm not staring.” At her raised eyebrow I continued my pitiful defense. ”I'm merely watching the goings-on and social interactions of our peers in a moment of educational respite.”

”Yeah. No matter how you say it, you're staring.” She glanced their way as Cheryl leaned in to whisper something in Luke's ear. ”She's making the push now before he caves and forgives you.”

I forced my gaze back toward Rachel behind me. This was what a best friend was for. To tell you exactly what you wanted to hear when the truth wouldn't do any good.

”It's true,” she insisted. ”Watch her. She's paying as much attention to you as to him.”

I glanced at them again, only to catch Cheryl's eye before she s.h.i.+fted toward Luke, pus.h.i.+ng her barely-school-code cut T-s.h.i.+rt toward him. Granted, Luke's eyes never dropped to what she was offering, but that didn't stop me from wanting to rip her hair out. Again. Strand by strand. And then strangle her with it.

I was leaving the violent stuff for if she actually touched him.

Mrs. Lestor strolled into the room-which is just wrong for a woman in her fifties, especially since she didn't trip over any backpacks-and called for everyone to get in a seat.

With a last set of eye batting, Cheryl made her way to her desk. She lowered herself into that chair like it was a throne and she was the All High Exalted Princess of Teenagerdom.

Cla.s.s dragged. I mean, I may be an art geek, but I'm no nerd. Cla.s.s always drags, but it was horrible. I could feel Luke not looking at me. The force of his presence, his anger, drew my attention to him again and again. A squad of singing chipmunks in matching tutus could have pranced through the cla.s.sroom and I wouldn't have noticed.

When the bell finally rang, I sucked in a breath. My hands shook, but I needed to do something, some type of move forward. I couldn't stand the waiting any longer. If I didn't say something to him soon, it would just grow and grow and grow into this suffocating non-presence thing that would mean never being able to look at him without drowning in the pit where my heart used to be.

The bad side of being a W is that the windows are the farthest point from the doors. This-getting to Luke-was a bigger emergency than evacuating for a fire. Why did people have to move so slowly?

Pus.h.i.+ng through the door, I stumbled to a halt. It was as if they were there for my viewing pleasure. Remember that threat about the violent stuff coming if that cheer-dealer touched my want-him-back man? Yeah, well, Cheryl's hand was on Luke's arm, drawing him down toward her.

Red wasn't what I saw. I'm not sure what rage was in my book, but it was more a fuzzy-wavy thing than a color.

Someone b.u.mped me from behind and I stumbled forward almost into them. Neither noticed me. Not a surprise. I glanced down at my hands and wondered if I was fading again. Fading to something even Luke Parker couldn't see. Is that the way the Fates worked? I get my dad back and lose the first person I'd ever felt this burn for?

The moment had come and it was either grab it or let it slip by and never know if there was a chance under all that mess I'd created.

I opened my mouth, but nothing came out. Not even a squeak. Luke stood, his back rigid in front of me making me wonder if he knew I hovered behind him, if he could feel the pain of it all flowing off me.

Cheryl just kept chirping along on the other side of Luke. Didn't he know I was there, pleading for forgiveness with everything inside me? Words kept staying outside my reach so I cleared my throat.

If I hadn't seen his hand curl into a fist, I would have thought he hadn't heard me.

”Luke?” I tried to ignore the crack splitting my voice through his name.

His head c.o.c.ked to the side, as if listening to someone call him from a distance. As if deciding. And then, as those mama-made manners kicked in, I watched one shoulder hitch up before he turned, his green-eyed gaze drilling into me.

If there was ever a time I feared I might publicly toss my cookies, this was it.

”Congrats on your spot.” When he didn't turn away, didn't say anything, I kept pus.h.i.+ng wanting the comfortableness between us back. ”Coach says you and Chris will be unstoppable.”

As quick as that, he shut down. I must be a complete idiot to have said the C-word. It ended any chance I might have had.