Part 35 (1/2)
John was waiting for me at Pizza Hut. I wanted to return to the scene of our first meeting. He had antic.i.p.ated a long lunch and had ordered a bottle of wine. It felt like a homecoming. At the end of such an emotional week, I was particularly glad to see him.
His contract at IC was at an end. He felt the training had gone well and that there was now a good chance that the SHARE experience would sell well. As we looked over the menu, he chatted about progress. Before I left, I talked to Jo and realised that Johns contribution was not just technical. In the time he had been there, he had formed a committed and thriving team. The way he talked and cut through bulls.h.i.+t impacted on staff morale. Two-months earlier when the department had been formed, there was a group of disparate and irritable people. Now it was a cohesive squad equipped to take on the compet.i.tion. I finally realised why Johns reputation was so good.
”Everything is set,” he said.
”Thats good. A week ago I was dreading this, but now Im quite excited about it.”
”Mike talked to everyone in the department yesterday. The reaction was really good. He let me say my piece. I was moved that people listened to my views and were so supportive.”
It was good to hear that the future was positive for IC staff despite the direction of my own life. We were gearing up for the largest marketing and sales push in our history and even Sam and Elaine had taken the time to speak with everyone. They had organised a drinks reception to round off the day: a last chance to let their hair down before ”the big push”.
We chatted and exchanged small talk until the food came. Then I decided to get personal. Several things bugged me and I wanted to clear them up.
”John?” I started tentatively.
”Yes, Pen?”
”Why did you sit next to me on the plane?”
”Seriously?”
”Yes, I really want to know!” I said.
”Remember my talk at the CIPD?”
”Could hardly forget it!”
”Well, your a.r.s.e was definitely part of the equation but not the main reason!”
”What else?”
”I noticed you sitting in the lounge. Our eyes met a couple of times and I liked that. You were reading a book, like me. It was a novel by Bernice Rubens, I think. Ive read her novels so I thought we might get on. But it was when you moved in the queue that I realised youd noticed me too.”
I was listening attentively, trying to see myself through his eyes and understand how I had impacted on him. He looked at me from time to time, but as he spoke he focussed more and more on his thoughts. His eyes wandered around, looking variously at his food, the table and me. As he did so, his face lit up.
”The clincher was definitely the shoelaces,” he said.
”You mentioned that in the speech, didnt you?”
”Yes. When you did that I knew you mustve read Ms magazine.”
I did not understand how he could work out that I had once read Ms magazine.
”How could you know that?”
”Easy. Thats where the advice was first given to women. There was an article in the mid-90s telling women how to flirt at work. The headline was quite uninspiring, I remember. I think it was something like 'The Working Womans Guide to s.e.x at Work right before an article about s.e.xual hara.s.sment! Anyway, I pictured you as a single professional woman who enjoyed her independence and men!”
We both laughed at the irony, but I was still amazed that hed made a connection.
”You never cease to amaze, John. Are you really telling me that you remembered this article about tying non-existence shoelaces while in the queue at the airport?”
”Its not so strange Penny. I didnt read the article, I wrote it! I added that bit of advice about the shoelace as a joke. Id never seen anybody do it. I thought the idea was amusing and it would be a laugh for the magazines readers.”
”You?”
”Why so surprised? Id just finished my PhD and was full of that stuff. I had to make a living and for a short while I wrote lots of magazine articles.”
”I cant believe it!” I said, absolutely gob-smacked.
John looked me square in the eye.
”So there you were doing something to attract me that Id written about nearly 10 years earlier. It was art creating life. I was looking at you in those fantastic jeans and pondering the connection between us. I stood there behind you and realised that my life had touched yours 10 years earlier. I couldnt resist talking to you.”
As I was trying to take this in, to comprehend the myriad of different things that he had been thinking about when we met, I realised what a complex and accidental thing attraction can be.
”Do you remember what you asked me on the plane?”
”We chatted for ages, I mustve asked you many things,” he replied.
”About s.e.xism in the army!”
”Did I ask you that? My goodness we must have got on well for me to ask you that!”
He had forgotten. To me that question had separated him from everyone else Id ever known. To him, the question was old hat, a party piece that hed asked hundreds, if not thousands of times.
”Yes! You were very forward,” I said.
”You mean there are people more forward than me?” he joked.
I tried to think of one, but could not.
”Well, theres me!” I answered.
”Yes,” he laughed. ”Youre definitely more forward than me!”
As we laughed, I wanted to tell him of my discovery.
”I have an answer for you.”
”To what?”
”To your question, dummy!”
”Oh, that?” he said mockingly as I realised that he was jesting with me.
”If you have, Pen, then you have my total respect. Usually I have to spend ages giving hints and heavy clues before people work it out.”
I hesitated. What if I had missed the point and was about to make a complete fool of myself? I dismissed it quickly from my thoughts. If I was to become a fool again, it would take its place at the back of a very long list of foolish thoughts and actions. I wanted to know whether my answer was the one he was looking for so I set aside my fears and told him.