Part 25 (1/2)

There was silence, so her mother gently opened the door of her room and a crumpled figure lay in the bed asleep.

”Oh the pet!” said her mother. ”Shes cried herself to sleep. What do you want to do?”

”Can I stay here a bit, maybe make her a drink, wake her up and chat.”

”Feel free, my dear. Were at our wits end. Dont know what to do. Well be in the shop.”

I sat with Elona for fifteen minutes before stirring myself to go to the kitchen. I took the liberty of putting together breakfast-in-bed. Having played hide and seek with the b.u.t.ter, bread, plates and bowls, I finally a.s.sembled something that looked appetising.

”Elona?” I said gently as I rocked her shoulder.

She turned around and after a moment of confusion she saw the breakfast tray.

”Youve been busy!”

”Yes. You looked like you could do with something.”

”Whatre you doing here?” she asked.

”Im finding out how you are. n.o.body at work could contact you. We were worried.”

She sat up in bed and I gave her the tray.

”This is kind of you.”

”Just part of the job. Dont make me into a saint,” I responded.

”No. This is kind of you.”

Earlier in my career I might have believed that these visits were out the kindness of the companys heart but over the years I had come to realise that this was just another way to ensure that people did not take the p.i.s.s and bunk off work. And yet I did feel concern for her so I accepted her thanks.

”Your mum and dad say youve been upset.”

As I looked at her face, I could see the tear stains around her eyes. Without make-up she looked quite different, but still had a girlish charm. She looked at me sorrowfully and tried to talk but nothing coherent came out. Eventually, she started to nod and the tears began to flow as she tucked into her toast and cup of tea. I did not try to start a conversation and just sat next to her. It is hard watching someone sink into the depths of despair.

We sat there while she finished her breakfast and then she thanked me again.

”You didnt have to come,” she commented.

”Elona. I wont kid you. Im here because youve been off work for 10 days this year and it is my job to be here. At the same time I do care what happens to you and if theres a way I can help then I will. Have you seen a doctor?”

She gave a dismissive laugh.

”h.e.l.l just say Im depressed and give me some drugs. I dont want that.”

”Im sure theyll do whats best.”

At this comment Elona looked at me angrily.

”I said I dont want that. Did you not hear me?”

The sharpness of her tone took me aback and I realised that perhaps she was not quite the shrinking violet that I had previously thought.

”Yes. I heard you,” I said. ”What then?” I asked.

”Nothing,” she said. ”Im nothing. n.o.body likes me. n.o.body. Im useless, completely f.u.c.king useless, a waste of s.p.a.ce, a zero, a failure.”

I listened with patience. In the back of my mind, I recalled the many conversations Id had with John. I wondered if he might be able to help. At the moment, however, I was on my own and had to do the best I could.

”I need you,” I said.

”You dont need me. Administrators are ten-a-penny.”

It was my turn to show a bit of aggression.

”Dont give me that c.r.a.p. Ive seen your file and youve earned that position. There are people at work who believe in you.”

My efforts were not rewarded.

”I dont give a s.h.i.+t. Its all meaningless.”

”Why?” I asked.

”Im useless. n.o.body likes me.”

”Is this to do with Nathan?”

At this remark she turned toward me and I could see the rage building in her face. Even though she was slightly built I began to feel a bit afraid. She looked like she was going to explode, so I started to clear the tray and returned to the kitchen. As I walked out of the room a torrent of abuse showered my back as she screamed the place down about Nathan, her parents, her ex-boyfriend, Mike, work, me, Phil. We had all ruined her life.

I tried to remain calm but it was difficult. When I returned from the kitchen I held out my hand and surprisingly she took it. She turned onto her side and wept again. I sat with her for another quarter of an hour, motionless except for the occasional stroke of her face.

”Elona. I need to go now. There are a couple of people I want to talk to and then Ill be back. Do you understand?”

She made no movement so I repeated the question and she gave a nod of her head.

Chapter 39.

For the rest of the day, I busied myself. My first port of call was John. He was in a meeting with Jo, but he agreed to take a break at mid-day and chat to me in the canteen. Next I went to see Mike. As I walked through the door, he smiled at me as if it was any other day at work. Even though I was there on business, I felt myself get aroused as I moved closer toward him.

”h.e.l.lo....err....Penny!” he said slightly stiffly. ”What can I do for you?”

”Can I speak to you in private?” I asked.

”Anything in particular you want to speak about?” he enquired.