Vol 4 Chapter 5 (1/2)
These are English translations for the novel No. 6 by Asano Atsuko.
Please hover over the image to see the text.
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CHAPTER 5
Into the Unknown Light
In the heavens, black clouds gathered
On the earth, bl.u.s.tering winds blew
For seven months and seven nights, the storm clouds covered the sky
For nine months and nine nights, violent gusts buffeted the land.
The waters of Yangtze swelled up to the top,
and river waters spread to every corner of the land.
- Chinese myth - Creation Story of the Lisu
Trans. Kimijima Hisako (Chik.u.ma Shobo) [1]
”Ma'am, can I have some m.u.f.fins, please?” Lili came bursting into the store.
”Huh?” She stopped abruptly, and blinked quizzically, still clenching the coins in her fist. Karan couldn't help but smile at how adorable she was.
”You're here again, Uncle?”
Yoming smiled wryly at his niece's frank att.i.tude.
”Lili, I'm here to do my job. You understand, right?”
”What job?”
”You know Ms. Karan's m.u.f.fins, the ones you love so much? I'm going to write a feature on them. An impressive job, don't you think?”
”What's a feature gonna do?”
”It'll make the m.u.f.fins famous. Ms. Karan will have lots and lots of customers.”
”I don't want that,” Lili said, puffing out her cheeks sulkily as she glared at her uncle. ”If everyone buys her m.u.f.fins, there won't be any left for me.”
”Don't worry,” Karan said as she took two m.u.f.fins out of the display case. ”You're my important customer. I'll always set aside some for you. Cheese and raisin, one of each. The raisin one is a present from me.”
”Really? Thank you,” Lili glowed. ”Can I eat it now?”
”Sure you can,” Karan said. ”It's right about tea time, anyway. Why don't we make some hot cocoa for Lili, hmm?”
”Yay! You're the best,” Lili grinned.
How lovable she is.
Karan's heart warmed. It always happened when she saw children smile. A warm, gentle feeling rose up inside her heart each time.
As a resident of Lost Town, an older district of No. 6, Lili was certainly not in the most plentiful of environments. In a city like this, where elites sat at the pinnacle and a complete hierarchy ruled, no matter how hard Lili tried, she would never be able to climb to the upper echelons. Lost Town was a residential district for people who sat at the bottom of the hierarchy. Among adults, there were many people who showed listlessness or angry abandon at their defeat, but children were not infected by this. They raced down alleyways, laughed at the smallest things, and set their eyes aglow at tasty foods. Perhaps this was an easier place to live for them compared to Chronos, where they would be placed under strict management and thorough instruction.
I want them to be happy.
Karan thought in her heart while she gazed at Lili's carefree smile.
I want the children, at least, to be happy.
But what should I do so that they can? As an adult, what am I able to do? I can't even save my only son, or even the girl that loved him―
”Karan, what's the matter?”
Yoming lifted his face from photographing the m.u.f.fins and croissants.
”Oh, no, I was just―”
”Were you thinking about your son?”
”I guess you can say that... But I'm always thinking about s.h.i.+on,” Karan said. ”I haven't forgotten about him for a single second. He appeared in my dreams last night, too.”
”Of course,” Yoming said softly. ”Of course―you're a mother. I'm sorry, that was inconsiderate of me.”
Karan turned to face Yoming, and shook her head firmly.
”He looked very well.”
”What?”
”My son. He was smiling. He looked a little thinner, but he had such a nice smile on his face. I thought, my, this boy must be happy. I was happy, too. Even my heart felt a little lighter when I woke up.”
”Happy, huh,” Yoming said thoughtfully. ”Karan, whatever state he's in, your son is out there alive. That's for sure.”
”And I'm grateful for it.”
As long as you're alive, I won't ask for anything more.
s.h.i.+on, live―and come back to me once more.
She placed a cup of cocoa down in front of Lili, and a cup of coffee in front of Yoming.
”Huh? Are you eating too, Uncle?” Lili asked sternly. ”Don't you think you're overstaying your welcome?”
Yoming choked on his coffee. Karan burst out laughing.
”Both you and your uncle are my special customers. It's on the house,” she rea.s.sured her.
”Okay,” Lili replied, somewhat unconvinced. ”You know, Mommy thinks Uncle Yo might be making moves on you, ma'am. What's 'making moves' mean?”
”Oh dear,” Karan said with a smile.
Yoming broke into a fit of coughing.
”Th-That's absurd,” he sputtered. ”Tell Renka―tell your mother, that Uncle Yo was very, very angry about that.”
”I don't think Mommy's gonna be scared of you even if you get mad,” Lili said boldly. ”You won't get dinner next time you come to our house, Uncle.”
Karan was so amused by the sour expression on Yoming's face that she knelt down behind the display case to succ.u.mb to laughter. As she laughed, she remembered what Yoming was saying to her before Lili came in.
Karan, do you think we ought to keep on being this way?
That was how Yoming had started the conversation.
Do you think this city, No. 6, should keep being the way it is? You might not know much, but you do know enough. You know that this place is built on lies.
Yes, I know.
Both you and I have had our sons stolen from us. You still have hope, but my son will never come back again. Nor my wife. This city eats people up like a demon.
Yes.
Karan. Don't you think we can change this place?
Pardon me?
Don't you think we could change the Holy City so it can be reborn again into a place of human beings?
Us... change...?
Not only the two of us. There are others who have realized the true nature of the Holy City. We're―
That was when Lili had come bursting in.
Karan lapsed into thought.
Instead of just waiting, just praying, or just crying the days away, what can I do to embrace s.h.i.+on again? What can I do to save Safu?
Cheep-cheep.
There was a small squeak. A cry she had long awaited. A small mouse was curled up under the display case. Its long tail and grape-coloured eyes shone in Karan's vision like diamonds. In the long hours after s.h.i.+on had disappeared, what strong support this tiny creature had given her at times when she felt like she would be washed away by her despair, loneliness, and hopelessness.
She gently placed a morsel of cheese m.u.f.fin on the floor.
Thank you. Thank you so much.
”You came again.”
A pea-sized capsule dropped into her outstretched palm. It was a letter from s.h.i.+on. She had been told at the beginning that if anything out-of-place happened, a black mouse would come to notify her. It was a brown mouse this time, like the last. s.h.i.+on was still safe. He was still alive. Perhaps he was even breaking out into joyous laughter now and then.
s.h.i.+on.
She spread open the contents of the capsule with trembling fingers. It was a folded sc.r.a.p of paper. On it was just a single line.
That was all it said. It was s.h.i.+on's writing, without a doubt. It was his letter, which she had long hoped for. But a sense of unease rippled through Karan's heart. This―
Mom, thank you. I'll love you always.
These were almost like words of farewell. Like a last kiss, a last embrace, the last words.
Mom, thank you. I'll love you always.
Goodbye.
The last unwritten line swirled inside her head.
She stood up. She felt faint. The ceiling, the floor, was spinning.
”Karan!”
”Ma'am!”
She heard Yoming and Lili calling her from far away.
s.h.i.+on, wait.
She reached out and yelled.
Where are you going? What do you plan to do? Don't tell me―Don't say you're―
The Correctional Facility.
She couldn't stop shaking. Karan was seized by the horror of what her actions had brought about.
She had told him about Safu. s.h.i.+on was intending to help her escape. He was the kind of boy who would do something like that. It was something Karan would have known he would do. She should have known more than anyone else.
Her ego as a mother emerged fully exposed.
I shouldn't have told him. Out of all people, I should never have told s.h.i.+on.
No, s.h.i.+on. You can't go. You can't be the one that dies.
Wait, wait.
She fell to her knees. In front of her was a small mouse. It was holding the m.u.f.fin morsel in both paws, and nibbling at it.
Nezumi―
Uncertainty weighed heavily upon her chest, and her heart felt like it was being wrung.
Where are you? Are you by his side? If you are, then please don't leave him. I'm begging you. Protect him. Protect him.
Nezumi!
The air was thick with the stench of blood, refuse, and sweat. The people had been crowded into a windowless cargo container, squeezed so much they could barely move, and they were gasping amidst the stench of blood, refuse, and sweat. He couldn't breathe. It was hot and humid in this confined s.p.a.ce, and there was no light. It was like they were not even permitted to breathe.
Beside s.h.i.+on, a man entering his senior years gave a short gasp. After several sharp breaths, his head lolled forward. s.h.i.+on could feel the man's body begin to convulse repeatedly through his own shoulder, which was pushed up against him. s.h.i.+on managed to squirm enough to get his hand free and place it on the man's mouth.
”Nezumi,” he said.
”What?”
”This man―he just died.”
”I see,” Nezumi responded flatly. ”Did he have a heart attack or something?”
”It might be.”
”I see. Well, if he was able to go quickly, maybe it was all the more lucky for him.”
Maybe it was luckier to be able to die here, rather than not being able to die here. Nezumi's words weren't sarcastic or joking. It was probably the truth.
As s.h.i.+on withstood the weight of the deceased man, he thought about the baby―the small baby he had left along with a dog in the shadows of the rubble. Would the baby survive?
”Inukas.h.i.+'s probably in a rage right about now.” A smile spread thinly across Nezumi's lips.
”Huh?”
”He'd be flying off the handle because you dumped that baby into his care. I can just imagine him holding that wailing baby in his arms and cursing you to high heaven.”
”He'd take care of the baby somehow, wouldn't he?”
”Who knows? It's probably already taking everything he's got to take care of himself and his dogs. Though he probably won't go as far as to feed the baby to them.”
”Inukas.h.i.+'s kind,” s.h.i.+on said firmly. ”He wouldn't abandon a helpless baby.”
”Wouldn't he, now?”
”He wouldn't, because he's been raised by a compa.s.sionate mother.”
”I see. So you're taking advantage of his compa.s.sion and kindness to dump that baby on him, huh?”
”Oh―well, I guess if you put it that way, I have. I didn't realize.”
”It might be hard to imagine for Little Mr. Naive, but it's tough. Babies and puppies are different. Humans take ten times more ha.s.sle. Poor Inukas.h.i.+, he has to cut back on his own food income to care for someone else's baby.”
”I'll apologize,” s.h.i.+on said simply.
”What?”
”I'll apologize next time I see him.”
If you ever do, Nezumi muttered as he shrugged his shoulders.
”But how could you tell?” s.h.i.+on asked. ”How did you know I was thinking about the baby?”
”We've been together long enough to get sick of each other. I can tell most of the time. You're pretty easy to read, and―no―” Nezumi cut off abruptly, and touched his neck. That's not it, he muttered. ”I can't read you at all.”
Suddenly, they heard m.u.f.fled sobbing from somewhere. It was a feeble voice, belonging to a woman.
”Oh... oh... oh...”
As if dragged along by her weeping, there came an eruption of sobbing from all over. Some belonged to women, others to men. No one was strong enough to raise their voice in an anguished cry. Seized by despair, exhaustion, and fear, they could only weep softly, in a voice that was barely audible.
As he squatted on the floor hugging his knees, s.h.i.+on felt the tearful sniffling of the people soaking into his body.
Oh, oh, oh...
Oh, oh, oh...
He wanted to cover his ears, but he knew he could not. Even if he did, it would come seeping in through his skin. It would seep in through his nostrils, the tips of his hair.