Chapter 59 (1/2)
Chapter 59 Original and most updated translations are from volaretranslations.
(Fang Hua, I’ve brought back that person for you.)
(The gentle wind, the endless gra.s.s…the low notes of the qin, the evening’s setting sun. Ten years endured by that grave with nothing but the floating scent of flowers.)
—
I was fl.u.s.tered, wholly and truly lost. I’d never felt such a strong sense of unease. A Fang Hua Beast injured by sentiment lived every ten days as if it was a year. I’d been by his side…for a very long time…
When he picked me up from his doorstep, I’d already discovered that the color of his mole was very dark. But despite everything, he should still have held out until I returned. Why was it like this? I’d brought back Han Zichuan…why did it turn out like this…
The bamboo seemed to be sobbing quietly, their forms flas.h.i.+ng back and forth in the wind. The windchime beneath the eaves tinkled as the bamboo stalks dashed against each other.
“Shao’er, Shao’er, the yellow earth hill. Fang Hua’s at the yellow earth hill.”
Astonished, I saw a small feather float down from the air and raised my head to see the parrot standing on the roof, staring at me with its liquid eyes.
The yellow earth hill…
When I forced Han Zichuan up the mountain, we’d pa.s.sed by that place, but there was no sign of anyone there.
“You little beast, you’re teasing me again,” I laughed in spite of myself and got up. It was hard for me to believe my own words, but I kept repeating them anyways. “Fang Hua’s body must have been ailing, so Second went with him on a walk.”
The parrot landed on my shoulder anxiously, shuffling its claws as it pecked me with its beak.
“Fang Hua’s always been docile. When I said I didn’t like other people seeing him, he used to stay with me for a month or half a year without ever going out. Second’s the lively type and Fang Hua’s softhearted, so he was probably persuaded to take a trip to town,” I seemed to have lost part of my soul as I walked along, slow and stupid.
“Shao’er, Shao’er, the yellow earth hill. Fang Hua’s buried by the yellow earth hill.”
Its voice suddenly turned sad and shrill…
Abruptly, I came to a stop. It was as if something I’d only tacitly understand had broke through to the surface, tearing apart my last traces of hope. My body started trembling uncontrollably as the shoulder where the bird had pecked me started to ache. When I turned back, the little creature was urging me along, as if it was more anxious than me.
My eyes swept past the corridors, seeing every door flung wide open with no sign of Han Zichuan in sight. Something occurred to me just then and I quickly used my internal energy to leap out of the house, stepping past the bamboo to head to that place.
The yellow earth hill didn’t have such a name originally. Perhaps a place like this, where all sorts of mysterious flowers and extraordinary plants took root, might have an even prettier name. I’d just never bothered to ask Fang Hua what it was.
As I rushed on, the thin leaves of bamboo brushed across my face, chilly and a bit painful. There was a single grave standing within that valley, a desolate peak surrounded on all sides by medicinal plants and the aroma of flowers. I could see an indistinct form bending down to pluck something out.
That person was Han Zichuan…
I narrowed my eyes and rushed over, grabbing his hand.
“What are you doing?”
Han Zichuan looked at me with a smile. “I saw your Fang Hua…”
The wind gradually picked up, a.s.sailing us with the scent of flowers. I stood dumbfounded as I stared at that smiling face. There was no surprise nor sorrow there, only his usual calm and high spirits, as if everything here had fallen within his predictions. The gra.s.ses around the yellow earth hill were sweet-smelling and fragrant, billowing in the wind like soundless sobbing…
The remains of a skeleton were nestled up next to the tomb, behind which stood a single Fang Hua wood…solitary and s.h.i.+ning pitch-black, emanating a fragrance that permeated its surroundings.
—
Fang Hua have an exceedingly unrivaled beauty resembling that of a woman’s, that is difficult to find in the world. As an animal that possesses a sentimental disposition, they will be tied down by the threads of sentiment all their lives. Those who cannot escape the bonds of sentiment are robbed of their lives and die young, leaving the numbers who manage to attain Right Fruit[1] fewer and fewer.
—
Han Zichuan knelt gently on the ground with a hand on his knee, the other brus.h.i.+ng against the Fang Hua wood in the soil with hooded eyes. “When a Fang Hua Beast dies, it’ll turn back into dead wood. If they are heavily injured by sentiment, the color of the wood will turn black, and act as a strong dilution agent for poisons. So it really is true…”
My whole body was shaking as I looked at Han Zichuan’s handsome face staring at the Fang Hua wood. His pupils seemed alit with deep interest, but there wasn’t a speck of grief within them…as if such a death was nothing important. He was completely enraptured by this unremarkable Fang Hua wood, staring at it idiotically while I stared at him. The air about us was scented with the same faint fragrance that only followed Fang Hua himself.
Fang Hua was dead…
Han Zichuan suddenly laughed, reaching out to touch the pitch-black wood. My heart sank as my breath caught, and I grabbed Han Zichuan’s hand in a flash, voice low. “What are you doing? Could it be…all this time, you…”
You wanted this Fang Hua wood?! The rest of the words stuck in my throat, refusing to be spoken. Han Zichuan stood looking at me without saying a word.
“Where did you read that part about the Fang Hua Beast you said just now?” I gazed at him indifferently as my grip tightened, nails drawing blood from the palm of his hand.
He curved his lips up into a grin. “Shao’er you fool, we both lived with Fang Hua in the same house…” he dragged out the sentence before grabbing my hand, clasping it tightly. “If you can go to Fang Hua’s study, then so can I.”
“All the years you’ve lived with us was all part of your scheme to get the Fang Hua wood?”
Han Zichuan wore a brilliant smile. “You know I don’t love him.”
Such a lack of love.
I looked at him deeply, eyes filled with distress. “All these years and I’ve never forgotten what happened in the palace. That image of you two drunkenly lying together was like a needle piercing my heart. I’ve buried it for so long, but now you’re telling me you were hugging him on the bed just for something like this?”
A complicated look appeared in Han Zichuan’s eyes, before something flickered and disappeared. Whatever he meant to say then, he never did.
I was beside myself with rage. “After I left, Fang Hua got sick in the Long Spring Courtyard, right? You knew for a long time that he was ill, so why did you let him leave the palace? Why did you let him live in this faraway place without anyone to take care of him? Without anyone to defend him? Why did you let him just wait until he died?”
Han Zichuan was still smiling easily when he replied. “This was something Fang Hua requested himself, so all Zhen could do was give my consent.”
“For five years, five entire years…I heard nothing but news of Fang Hua from the palace. All those five years, I thought he was still in court living with you.”
“All of my male attendants were named Fang Hua. Didn’t you find out yourself after coming into the palace? I merely used them to mislead the ministers at court,” Han Zichuan reminded me kindly.
“You misled me as well! You spread news of you and Fang Hua amongst all the commoners, forcing me to suffer after I left you. Do you know how I lived through those five years?!”
“I know,” he laughed. “You took in six princes.” Perhaps he’d noticed I looked unsightly, because he stopped using ‘Zhen’. My chest surged with an anger so fierce I could never spit it out or swallow it down. All I did was give him a murderous glare.
“Silly Shao’er, didn’t I send you to him for his final days? You managed to fulfill your filial duty as a disciple.”
“Is that so…” I smiled mournfully.
After we’d spent a night together, after you made me think you were my husband-to-be, you send me off to Fang Hua…you’re so ruthless. Was a single branch of Fang Hua wood that important? For you to take all those pains.
I suddenly lost all my energy. Everything had exceeded my predictions. Han Zichuan took another breath and walked forward, hugging my s.h.i.+vering body close in a firm embrace. I turned my face away, eyes closed to think, before opening them to look at the half-buried Fang Hua wood again.
Fang Hua, I really want to kill this person right now.
But I can’t…because, he can save you. Perhaps…there was still hope if I use his blood to revive you.
Han Zichuan seemed satisfied with my docile behavior, smiling as he stroked my hair. His tone of voice grew gentle and soft. “Shao’er, you don’t understand. Ever since the year Fang Hua brought me home, I began to like this sort of peaceful life. Fang Hua was proficient in qin, chess, calligraphy and painting, with good martial arts skills and an excellent temperament. He was just a little simple when it came to human affairs and matters–like a blank sheet of paper. You didn’t understand anything either, but I still envied you because your smile was so carefree. I envied the fact that you could bully me without scruples, make a fool of Fang Hua, and cause chaos in the house all day. Actually, at that time…I didn’t know he was a Fang Hua Beast.”
I had to smile too, though mine was more from ridicule. At that time…I didn’t know he was the crown prince, either.
“Regarding the things that happened in the past, I don’t want to mention them much,” Han Zichuan’s grip on me loosened slightly as he turned away. His high nose and arching eyebrows looked both grave and stern, filled with the aura of a ruler. “There were too many people plotting against me in the court back them. In order to protect my position as crown prince, I was forced to slip out on the precept to finding medicine for my father. Later on, I accidentally stumbled onto the records of the Fang Hua Beast in a book and realized…the hairpin in your hair was made from Fang Hua wood.”
And then you decided to hurt Fang Hua even after all that, not even sparing me.
“I’ve always been sincere about my feelings for you. Pity that all you did was chase after your master and never spared a glance for me,” Han Zichuan raised a hand to caress my face, his eyes s.h.i.+ning. “I couldn’t reconcile with myself. My father was going to die sooner or later, and I didn’t think it was worthwhile to save a dying man by killing the Fang Hua I respected and admired. But later on, I changed my mind.” He looked at me steadily, almost as if in a daze. “I’d never seen a Fang Hua wood before, much less the once-in-a-thousand-years appearance of the Fang Hua Beast. There were enough people plotting against me that I thought if I had one, I’d be safe from everything–and you’d finally belong to me.”
I shaped my lips into a smile, a little sad. “You racked your brains to say all that, but in the end it was still because you wanted the Fang Hua wood.”
Han Zichuan studied me intently, lips shut without a word.
I moved to block the tomb, saying lightly, “I won’t let you take him away. But you…” Pausing, I gave him a glance. “…aren’t going anywhere, either.”
A grin appeared on Han Zichuan’s face as he replied. “I know.” He still held my hand as before, not harried at all. “Let’s make a bet.”
I gave him an icy look.
Han Zichuan laughed, but tightened his grip on me, saying slowly word-by-word. “I’ll let you take my blood to save Fang Hua. If he revives with his previous life’s memories intact as the Fang Hua of before, I’ll let you go to take care of him for the rest of your lives. I’ll never bother you again.” He paused, before his smile widened. “Otherwise, you’ll go back to the palace with me.”
“A Fang Hua wood will reincarnate sooner or later. If he changes into human form…”
“Then I’ll give up on the Fang Hua wood,” he said with resolution.
“You used so much care to set this up, so how could you say you’ll give it up so easily?” I looked at Han Zichuan, voice thin. “Your proposal’s not bad, but I don’t want to bet with you, because…” My eyes were cold as I clapped his shoulders and leaned in. “Even if I’m not gambling….I can still use your blood to save him.”
“Maybe so. I don’t think you even know how many days to feed him fresh blood. There’s no telling when some powerful army will make a surprise attack on the mountain and lay siege to this yellow earth hill. No matter how skilled the Carefree Idler is then, she’ll have trouble protecting the Fang Hua wood.”
“You…”
Han Zichuan looked off into the distance as he brushed past me. “Let’s place our bets on this final game of ours.”
His clothes whipped noisily in the wind as if he was someone who had gone through countless hards.h.i.+ps of life. The only thing missing for the image was the lack of worry etched onto his brow.
“Zichuan, why are you doing this? Even if he turns back into human form and never regains his memories, or never becomes the old Fang Hua, I’ll still leave with him.”
Han Zichuan quirked his lips into a smile and looked at me with an emotion I couldn’t read. “With his injuries so severe, I’m afraid he won’t even have the strength to transform.”
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