Part 10 (1/2)
Jesus! what balm is in that sound!
It bids our tears away; Spreads life and happiness around; Converts the night to day.
To feel Thy dying love, be mine; To hear Thy charming voice; The ceaseless whisper, 'I am Thine,'
Shall bid my heart rejoice.
Dearer than sons or daughters; Thou; Dearer than mother's love; Gladly for Thee I all forego, And seek my bliss above.
”I went to Wigginton to visit a young woman, whom I found praising G.o.d for having afflicted her, and brought her to the knowledge of the truth. To some others, I was powerfully constrained to speak respecting their souls.--Miss Bentley came for a few days. We visited many of the villagers, to put them in mind to prepare for eternity.--Mr. Hope announced from the pulpit, that it was his wish I should commence a cla.s.s in Haxby on Monday evening, at seven o'clock.
The words occurred to me, 'By whom shall Jacob arise, for he is small?' O my G.o.d, to Thee my obligations are great, and my weaknesses are all known; but if this is from Thee, bring it to pa.s.s; let there be some token for good, some rending of heart among the people.--According to appointment I went to Haxby, to meet any who were desirous of fleeing from the wrath to come. Three persons came; two of them backsliders, and one who has never met before.--Visited several of the villagers. At one place I felt much while bowed at the throne of grace. A little boy, to whom I afterwards addressed a few words, burst into tears. O that the Lord would poor out His Spirit, and bow their hearts to His sway! O Lord, let not my unfaithfulness hinder Thy work.--After meeting my cla.s.s in the city, I went on to Heslington to see Mr. K., who is apparently on his death-bed. I endeavoured to speak faithfully; but unless the Spirit of G.o.d apply the truth, vain is the help of man. I feel much out of love with myself.--Walked again to see Mr. K., who appears as teachable as a little child. I feel encouraged to hope that he will lay hold upon Jesus. But O how dangerous to delay until death stares us in the face!--Went to Haxby, and found only one to meet me there: but the Lord met _her_, which was better than numbers without Him. O G.o.d, keep this precious soul--this _asked-for_ token of Thy love. While sitting under the word, the Lord made it as a broad river to my soul. 'Blessed are the pure in heart,' was the subject. Tears of love and grat.i.tude rolled down my cheeks, and love filled my heart; for I felt myself a partaker of this great salvation.”
Thus may I ever live, And feel the power divine; Taught by Thy Spirit to believe This full salvation mine.
”With a painful headache I walked to York; but the satisfaction of mind I felt in keeping the path of duty, amply repaid me. I think a general blessing was experienced.--While pleading with G.o.d, these words were applied, 'I am Thy salvation.' I felt confidence, but not all I want. I seem only on the edge of living; I want to be 'plunged in the G.o.dhead's deepest sea.'--Six months since my dear mother departed! She is daily the subject of my thoughts, and her memory becomes increasingly dear to me. Well, it is but a short separation--a thin part.i.tion; my earthly tabernacle feels the force of time--it crumbles and decays; but by faith I look for a more durable habitation, where I shall meet those who are gone before.”
Time rolls away--yet fresh the scene appears When my dear mother left this vale of tears; Then, sorrow stamped its seal upon my heart; Nature recoiled--but grace relieved the smart.
”Mr. R., discoursing on the necessity of exercising a forgiving spirit, ill.u.s.trated his subject by the following anecdote:--An officer in the army lying on his deathbed, sent for one of the preachers to visit him. On his entering the room, the sick man asked him, if he remembered that he was once insulted by a company of officers while he was preaching in Dublin. The preacher remembered it well. He then told him, that he had been one of the worst of them; and had sent to ask him to pray for him, and to teach him what he must do to be saved,--as he believed he was a dying man, and was unprepared for another world.
The minister pointed him to the Saviour; and after praying with him several times, was about to depart, when the officer offered him a handsome present for his services. This he refused, and took his leave. On pa.s.sing through the hall, one of the servants accosted him, ”What a pity my master won't see his son, and has cut him off with a s.h.i.+lling, although he would gladly see his father.” The minister immediately returned to the sick man, and repeated to him the Lord's prayer until he came to the words, 'as we forgive them that trespa.s.s against us;' he then stopped, and asked him if he forgave every one.
The officer paused a moment and replied, 'There is one whom I do not forgive, and cannot.' 'Then,' said the minister, 'neither will your heavenly Father forgive you your trespa.s.ses.' After some deliberation, it was agreed that the son should be sent for. He came, fell on his knees at the bedside, and with tears in his eyes, pressed his father's hand to his lips, and begged his forgiveness. The father's relentings were kindled: upon which the minister sung--
'The op'ning heavens around me s.h.i.+ne, With beams of sacred bliss; When--
'When!' cried the officer, 'nay
_Now_, Jesus shows His mercy mine.
And whispers I am His.'
”Called upon Mr. and Miss K. They had company: I was preserved from unprofitable conversation, and dared to speak for G.o.d. On my return, I pa.s.sed through the churchyard, where the remains of my dear parents are deposited. It was a beautiful moonlight night; and I stopped to shed a silent tear over the much-loved dust, in hope of joining them again in the realms above. Lord, help me on my way.--I went to see a backslider, whom the Lord had made willing to return. After conversing a little, we knelt down to prayer. Her husband prayed; then she began, and while confessing her sins and pleading for mercy, the Lord looked upon her in compa.s.sion, and healed her backslidings. The same afternoon, she came and joined herself with the people of G.o.d.”
”Alone in the room where my venerated mother breathed her last.”
Though no famed eulogy proclaims her worth, Nor with her fellow-pilgrims ranked on earth, A higher record doth her history trace; In heaven's high register she claims a place.
Retiring, and unknown or but to few, Her latter days were hid from public view; But I have often witness'd, when alone-- The prayer uplifted, and the sigh unknown.
When no eye saw her, but with G.o.d shut in, She pour'd her plaint to Him, who saw, unseen; Then from the sacred word she succour drew, 'To h.o.a.ry hairs I bear, I carry you.'
This promise still her drooping spirit cheered, And shed its starlight when the night appeared.
Bold, in her weakness, close the foe pursued, And oft the bitter conflict was renewed; Conqu'ror at last, she calmly soared away, And left a smile upon the pa.s.sive clay.
I heard Mr. Dawson, from 'Peter followed afar off'--a season, I hope, never to be forgotten; for then Richard made up his mind to accept the invitation, and 'come near,' as Mr. D. expressed it. This to me is matter of joy and thanksgiving; for since I knew that Mr. D. was coming, it has been my prayer, that his visit might be made a blessing to some, not particularly thinking of my son. Thus, beyond my expectation, has the Lord condescended to my prayer.
AFTER A FIT OF SICKNESS.
While thousands in Thy courts are found, Waiting on bended knee; Behold, in solitude, a worm, That dares approach to Thee, To me the heavenly gift impart, Thy Holy Spirit send; To fill and sanctify my heart, And bid its wand'rings end.
Then health or sickness let me share, As wills eternal love; For all is well, if Thou art near, Thy creature to approve.
My grateful thanks for ease I bring, And every comfort given; Nor less for sorrows, sent to wing My grov'lling soul to heaven.
Great G.o.d! to Thee my wishes flow, Who dost my life prolong; Thy witness let me live below, Thy statutes be my song.
”Ere the day broke, the Lord broke in upon my soul with the words, 'Thy sun shall no more go down, nor Thy moon withdraw itself, for the Lord shall be thy everlasting light, and the days of thy mourning shall be ended.' Such light shone upon the whole chapter, as filled my soul with grat.i.tude for the rich promises given to the people of G.o.d.--Called to see a man and his wife, both sick, to whom the Lord has blessed affliction. The man was rejoicing in the Lord, and the woman is resolved not to rest short of salvation. While we united in prayer she received some encouragement.”
XIV.