Part 1 (2/2)
”You know, the one where I have to,” she looked back over her shoulder to make sure my parents or Billy was not listening through my closed door. ”Where I have to kiss her.”
”Why? You know how to kiss. You do have a father after all.”
”Yeah, but that's different. He's a boy, this is a girl.”
”But you're playing a boy, so it's the same thing.”
”No it's not! And I don't kiss him like he's my girlfriend.” She said matter of factly.
”I hope not!” I giggled, liking this game of playing hard to get.
”Come on, Em!” she said eyeing me with those intense blue eyes that even at the tender age of eleven threw my senses out of whack, and would make me agree to anything.
”Okay. But first wait.” I threw my forgotten car on the floor and ran to the door. I opened it ever so slightly and looked at as much of the hallway as I could then shut the door and leaned my huge, trusty brown teddy, Ruffles against it to guard us. Next I went over to my window and shut my blue pastel curtains and then walked to my original spot and sat cross-legged in front of Beth.
”Gee. You'd think we were hiding in Fort Knox.” she said.
”What's that?”
”Never mind. Okay. You have the first line.” she said, looking at me expectantly.
I don't know what the line is.”
”Oh yeah. Okay, you look away from me and try to be all lady like and fl.u.s.tered because you're in my presence.” I stifled another giggle. ”Then you say, 'Well good morning, Joseph Wylde. How are you on this bright and sunny day?'”
”Well good morning, Joseph Wylde. How are you on this bright and sunny day?” I asked batting my eyelashes at her. Real serious like Beth grabbed my hand and brought it to her full lips, and just barely brushed my knuckles. A bolt of excitement raced up and down my spine. I didn't remember Joseph doing that to Thelma in rehearsal, but I didn't say anything. I would let Beth do whatever she wanted to. After all, she was the acting expert, not me.
”Thelma Rooster you are looking lovely as always. Why are you out here all alone?”
”Oohh! I remember this line!” I exclaimed. ”Mother's gone inside the store, Joseph.”
Beth smiled at me and nodded, then said, ”Good. Then you say, 'But you can walk me home if you like. I'm sure she'd be understanding of my taking my leave with such a kind gentleman like yourself.'” I began to repeat the line when she stopped me and pulled me to my feet. ”Let's really act it out.” she grabbed my hand and put it through her bent arm and held my hand with her other one. ”Your bedroom door will be the door to your house, okay?” I nodded than proceeded to say my line quite nicely I thought. We walked along our path until finally she stopped short of the door to my ”house”.
”It has been an honor to walk with you Thelma, that is, may I call you Thelma?” not knowing what to say, and Beth seemed to be a bit too much in character to remember to tell me so I just nodded. She smiled at me and released my hand from her arm. Her breath came in shallow puffs of air as her body came closer to mine. I was nervous, scared and excited all at the same time. She rested her hands on my shoulders then moved her head closer to mine. I was surprised when our lips met. I had been expecting her to kiss me on the cheek. My blood began to pound through my veins with enough electricity to short out all my thoughts. I had seen a woman close her eyes once in a movie when she was kissed by the man. Thinking this must be the correct procedure, I closed mine and sighed.
When the kiss ended Beth pulled away and looked me in the eye. A look of wonderment filled her face. I was almost breathless, and certainly speechless. I had never kissed anyone before except my parents, and my Aunt Kitty who insisted on giving me a big wet one every time I saw her, which was often. I had never liked any of those kisses. This was different, and I think we both knew it. She rolled a tendril of my summer-lightened hair around one of her fingers that still rested on my shoulders and smiled.
”Can we rehea.r.s.e again?” she said quietly. I could only nod. She took one of her hands and brushed some fallen hair off my forehead and brought her face to mine again. This time I wrapped my thin arms around her neck and leaned into her. My rock. Beth would always be the strong one.
The play met with critical acclaim among the fifth grade cla.s.s. Mrs. Arbuckle thought Beth's performance ”Much too dramatic for such a cheerful story.” What did she know? Beth was not cast again until middle school.
I turned the page. I saw more school pictures of us, and snapshots taken at home. Did my mother have nothing better to do than run after us with a camera? As a kid if never occurred to me that she took a ton of pictures. Now, it took an act of G.o.d to get me in front of that lens.
As the years went by Beth became more and more detached from her peers, especially the girls. The only way she would have anything to do with them, or talk to them was if they would challenge her or me, or make fun of either of us, or if some other girl had been the target of the ma.s.ses. Then she became a champion of anyone who became the ”underdog” If an injustice was being done, she would not hesitate to fight anyone, which she did often. Beth could most often be found with the boys. She was incredible when it came to basketball, or running, or any other game involving physical activity.. I smiled as I remembered Beth's slam-dunks.
”Come on, Em. Don't be such a wimp. Take the ball, run up the court, and jump. Slam it in there.” I stared at Beth like she had just landed from another planet.
”Beth, have you forgotten that you're the one who is a hundred feet tall? I'm short, remember?”
”So.” she said as she ran by me, whacking the ball out of my hand, and dribbling it down the cement until she pushed up on her left leg, and slammed the ball into the net with a satisfying whoosh. ”It's not about height, Em. It's about ability.” she landed with a smug smile on her face, her eyes daring me. I raised my brows. She knew I could never refuse a dare.
”Fine. I'll show you height. And I'll show you ability.” I grabbed the ball that continued to bounce down the court, and ran.
”I'm so sorry, Em. I really thought you could do it.” my best friend said as she sat next to me on our front porch, my mother holding the towel to my nose. I glared at her with my black eye.
Beth had a difficult home life. Her parents married when her mother became pregnant at the tender age of sixteen. Beth's father, Jim always made known his doubts that Beth was even his. But I believed he loved her. He raised her as his, and Beth loved him dearly. Her parents remained married until she turned thirteen, then deciding that he could no longer tolerate Beth's mother's tirades and drinking, her father left the family to return to his home state of Tennessee. Beth did not see him for years at a time.
To stay away from her house and the steadily increasing abuse of her mother, Beth would come over to mine, and I think in her mind she saw my mother and father as her own. Billy loved her. In his eyes it was almost like having the younger brother he had always wanted. Beth and I would lay out on my back lawn and stare up into the night sky trying to count all the stars we could see. She would often cry silently, the tears just flowing down her cheeks, rolling down the sides of her face to collect in her ears. She would s.h.i.+ver, and blame it on the cool night air.
I had to give my mother credit. She tried to be everything that Nora Sayers wasn't. She coddled her, taught her things, and showed her that Beth counted, and was loved. By all of us. Beth clung to that sense of security, wrapping it around herself like a blanket.
I came across a picture of the three of us on a fis.h.i.+ng trip just before the Sayers' separated. Billy had just turned seventeen, so my parents decided to give him a chance to prove himself responsible by taking his thirteen year old sister and her twelve year old best friend fis.h.i.+ng.
”I am not going to bait anything for you two, so you better get over that squeamish girl stuff, and learn to do it yourself.” he scolded as we backed out of the driveway of my house. I looked at Beth who sat with me in the back seat of our huge Suburban with a look of doubt sp.a.w.ned by fear on my face. She smiled at me. I felt my fears melt away.
”I don't need no one tying on my worms if that's what you mean. Heck no. I bet I could do it better than you anyway!” she said proudly.
”Girls.” Billy mumbled to himself, though through the rear-view mirror I could see the small smile play across his maturing face.
After a long three hour drive we finally reached Carter Lake and found a good place to stay for the night. The area was completely surrounded by huge, beautiful trees. Beth and I got out of the car and made a slow circle of the area. The day was warm, but the shade of so many trees made it absolutely incredible with endless shade. The maze of trees and vegetation went on and on, and any number of adventures could be played out.
”You thinking what I'm thinking?” Beth asked mischievously. I gave her a smile and said, ”See you later, Billy!” I grabbed her hand, and we ran toward the thicket of dense fantasy.
”Hey! You guys gotta help me!” my brother yelled.
”We're just girls! We can't do it anyway!” Beth yelled as we disappeared into the forest, our giggles the only clue we were there.
After a bit we stopped running for fear of running head long into a tree trunk. We walked hand in hand looking at the incredible beauty of G.o.d's planet. The hillside was sloped slightly, the ground soft from recent rains. We stepped over fallen trees, and ducked under low branches. I looked up in wonder at the huge trees, so stoic in their existence. Chipmunks called warnings to each other, mosquitoes and b.u.t.terflies fluttered about our heads.
”I think we should live here forever. Never go back to school, never get jobs when we get older. Just stay here and live off the land like Tarzan.” I said wistfully.
”Me Tarzan, you Jane.” Beth said pounding her developing b.r.e.a.s.t.s with her fist. I giggled.
”No way. Me Tarzan, and you Jane.”
”Uhunh. I want to wear the loin cloth.” We walked on in silence. ”No I think we should be more like Huck Finn and Tom Sawyer.” She said after a few moments.
”I want to be Huck Finn!” I exclaimed thinking of the possibilities.
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