Part 12 (1/2)
”Are we, then,” he asked softly, ”such very important things in the scheme of G.o.d's entire creation that everything must be ordered so as to suit us best?”
”I only wanted to be happy,” murmured Elsa, in a quivering voice.
”You only wanted to be happy in your own way, my child,” rejoined the priest, as he patted her hands tenderly, ”but it does not happen to have been G.o.d's way. Now who shall say which is the best way of being happy?
Who knows best? You or G.o.d?”
”If the postman had given me the letter, and not to father,” she murmured dully, ”if father had not been stricken down with illness the very next day, if I had only had this letter two years ago, instead of to-day . . .”
And the sentence was left unfinished, broken by a bitter sigh of regret.
”If it all had been as you say, my child,” said Pater Bonifacius kindly, ”then you might perhaps have been happy according to your own light, whereas now you are going to be happy in accordance with that of G.o.d.”
She shook her head and once more her eyes filled with tears.
”I shall never be happy again,” she whispered.
”Oh, yes, you will, my dear,” retorted the kindly old man, whose rugged face--careworn and wrinkled--was lit up with a half-humorous, wholly indulgent smile; ”it is wonderful what a capacity for happiness the good G.o.d has given to us all. The only thing is that we can't always be happy in our own way; but the other ways--if they are G.o.d's ways--are very much better, believe me. Why He chose to part you from Andor,” he added, with touching simplicity, ”why He chose to withhold that letter from you until to-night, we shall probably never know. But that it was His way for your future happiness, of that I am convinced.”
”There could have been no harm this time, Pater, in Andor and I being happy in our way. There could be no wrong in two people caring for one another, and wanting to live their lives together.”
”Ah! that we shall never know, my child. The book of the 'might-have-been' is a closed one for us. Only G.o.d has the power to turn over its pages.”
”Andor and I would have been so happy!” she reiterated, with the obstinacy of a vain regret; ”and life would have been an earthly paradise.”
”And perhaps you would have forgotten heaven in that earthly paradise; who knows, your happiness might have drawn you away from G.o.d, you might have spent your life in earthly joys, you might have danced and sung and thought more and more of pleasure, and less and less of G.o.d. Who knows?
Whereas now you are just going to be happy in G.o.d's way: you are going to do your duty by your mother and your father, and, above all, by your husband. You are going to fill your life by thoughts of G.o.d first and then of others, instead of filling it with purely selfish joys. You are going to walk up the road of life, my child, with duty to guide you over the roughnesses and hard stones that will bestrew your path: and every roughness which is surmounted, every hards.h.i.+p which is endured, every sacrifice of self which is offered up to One who made the greatest possible sacrifice for us all, will leave you happier than before . . .
happier in G.o.d's way, the best way of all.”
He talked on for a long while in this gentle, heartfelt way, and gradually, as the old man spoke, the bitterness and revolt died out of the simple-minded child's heart. Hers, after all, was a simple faith--but as firmly rooted within her as her belief in the suns.h.i.+ne, the alternating days and nights, the turns of the season. And the kind priest, who after life's vicissitudes had found anchorage in this forlorn village in the midst of the plains, knew exactly how to deal with these childlike souls. Like those who live their lives upon the sea, the Hungarian peasant sees only immensity around him, and above him that wonderful dome which hides its ineffable mysteries behind glorious veils of sunset and sunrise, of storm and of fantastic clouds. The plain stretches its apparently limitless expanse to a distance which he--its child--has never reached. Untutored and unlearned, he does not know what lies beyond that low-lying horizon into whose arms the sun sinks at evening in a pool of fire.
Everything around him is so great, so vast, so wonderful--the rising and setting of the sun, the stars and moon at nights, the gathering storms, the rainfalls, the sowing of the maize and the corn, the travail of the earth and the growing and developing of the stately heads of maize from one tiny, dried, yellow grain--that he has no inclination for petty casuistry, for arguments or philosophy. G.o.d's work is all that he ever sees: the book of life and death the only one he reads.
And because of that simple faith, that sublime ignorance, Elsa found comfort and peace in what Pater Bonifacius said. I will not say that she ceased to regret, nor that the grief of her heart was laid low, but her heart was soothed, and to her already heavy sorrow there was no longer laid the additional burden of a bitter resentment.
Then for awhile after he had spoken the priest was silent. No one knew better than he did the exact value of silence, whilst words had time to sink in. So they both remained in the gloom side by side--he the consoler and she the healed. The flickering candle light played curious and fantastic tricks with their forms and faces, lighting up now and then the wrinkled, wizened face of the old man, with the horn-rimmed spectacles perched upon his nose, and now and then the delicate profile of the girl, the smooth, fair tresses and round, white neck.
”Shall we not say a little prayer together?” whispered Pater Bonifacius at last, ”just the prayer which our dear Lord taught us--Our Father which art in heaven . . .”
Slowly the young girl sank on her knees beside the gentle comforter; her fair head was bowed, her face hidden in her hands. Word for word now she repeated after him the sublime invocation taught by Divine lips.
And when the final whispered Amen ceased to echo in the low, raftered room, Pater Bonifacius laid his hand upon the child's head in a gesture of unspoken benediction.
CHAPTER XI
”After that, happiness will begin.”
Pater Bonifacius' kindliness, his gentle philosophy and unquestioning faith exercised a soothing influence over Elsa's spirits. The one moment of rebellion against Fate and against G.o.d, before the arrival of the old priest, had been the first and the last.
There is a goodly vein of Oriental fatalism still lurking in the Hungarians: ”G.o.d has willed it!” comes readily enough to their lips.