Part 11 (2/2)

It had to be when she called me on my game. That must have been the moment I decided I wanted nothing more than to know every single thing about this girl. Because how did she know that about me? We haven't even known each other long, but when she looks at me, I feel like she knows exactly who I am. My deepest, darkest secrets. And that's weird. Crazy, even. Man, what is wrong with me? I wanted to be more like Jude before Claire, hit it once and never want anything else, but I'm acting like Jayden. Wanting all of her instead of a piece. That's so him, but really, I want to be me.

I'm just unsure of who I am.

As she cuddles into my side, I watch as her eyes slowly fall shut and her breath evens out. Apparently, she isn't having an internal battle like I am, and I admire her for that. She's something. Not only is she gorgeous and quick, she f.u.c.ks like a dream. I've been with a decent number of women, and my sister-in-law's best friend Delanie was by far the greatest lay of my life. That was until this thin-framed girl came along. I've never felt what I felt when I was deep inside Avery, and it worries me I'll never feel it again with anyone else.

Just her.

Pure ecstasy.

Closing my eyes, I inhale deeply, trying to shake these unneeded feelings and wants.

But it's no use.

So I try sleeping instead.

I jerk awake what feels like seconds later to someone slamming against the door.

”Open up, Sinclair! I'm tired.”

It's Markus.

Blinking, I realize my back aches and there is a crick in my neck, while one side of my body is covered with heat. s.h.i.+t, I forgot where I was for a second there. But when Avery stirs beside me, I remember exactly where I am and how I don't ever want to leave. She glances up at me, confused, and I move my finger along her lips.

”Sorry,” I say before clearing my throat. ”Hey, bro, not now. Go somewhere else.”

”Dude! You've had the room all night. I want to sleep in my bed. I don't care someone is in there with you. I won't look at her... I promise, I do! Just come on. Someone puked on the couch.”

”Ew,” Avery says from beside me and I nod.

”Not my problem, bro. Now, go away,” I say before cuddling against her.

”a.s.s!”

”Jerk,” I call back as she grins against my lips.

”I can leave,” she whispers, threading her fingers through my hair.

”No, don't.”

Her brows rise, her sleepy face breaking into a grin. ”Oh wow, Jace, that dripped with l.u.s.t,” she accuses and I smile at her. Her face is illuminated by the sun that is coming up. We must have slept for longer than I thought, and she probably does need to leave before everyone wakes up, but I don't want her to.

”Yeah,” I say roughly. ”Don't leave.”

She doesn't seem to agree. ”But I probably should before everyone sees me do the walk of shame.”

”There is nothing to be ashamed of,” I remind her and her lips curve.

”You're right, but still, I don't want anyone knowing I'm the eighth notch on Jace Sinclair's bedpost.” She gives me a cheeky wink and I chuckle. She's a cute little thing for sure, and soon my grin matches hers as I shake my head.

”Sure, but you're number one on my trampoline.” That has her body shaking against mine before she wraps her arms around me tightly. ”Also, if I walk you home, it isn't a walk of shame for sure.”

She gives me a doubtful look. ”You, Jace Sinclair, the Bullies' captain, are going to walk me home?”

”You know a lot about me, and I know nothing about you.”

She shoots me a playful grin. ”I like it that way.”

I wrap my arms around her and nip at her nose. ”I'll find out what I want in due time, but you ain't doin' no walk of shame. I'll walk you home.”

She grins, her cheeks bursting with color. ”And you say you're a player.”

”Shh, I am.”

”Oh, of course,” she giggles, running her nose along my jaw as silence fills the room. ”But maybe just a few more minutes before we do that.”

”Yeah,” I agree, holding her tightly because I think we both know what happens when we walk out that door.

This is over.

And even though she claims she doesn't want this to continue after we leave my room, I think she does. She just doesn't think she does, and I bet it has to do with the wickedest of the wicked. As much as I want to ask her about that, I know I can't. I have to tread lightly with this girl, get in where she can't push me out.

Hold the f.u.c.k up. I want that?

No, you don't, I tell myself. You want to f.u.c.k b.i.t.c.hes and light trails. You are not a one-woman man! You are a wanderer, a hang your hat everywhere kind of guy. Kick her off the trampoline and tell her good riddance. Be more cynical. This isn't what you want. What if it goes south, and it will... She's obviously not into it. She has one foot out the door; you're bound to get hurt. Remember the pain, remember the heartache Mom and Lucy went through? Hold on to that. You don't want this.

I hear myself loud and clear, so why isn't that pep talk working?

It's just that it feels right. Believe me, I'm not one of those people. I don't think there is a person out there for everyone. I think everyone is just trying so hard to find that someone and be happy, but then they settle for whatever comes because it's what society wants. They want you to get married, have babies, and die. But then, I can't really say that and believe it because of Jude and Claire and Jayden and Baylor. Those are relations.h.i.+ps that were mapped out in the stars. They were meant to be together and live and be happy. Oh s.h.i.+t, I sound like Jayden. f.u.c.k. So what the h.e.l.l do I think? What the h.e.l.l do I want?

What the h.e.l.l is wrong with me?

Nineteen years. Nineteen years have pa.s.sed and I haven't met anyone who had me wanting more. Even with Delanie, it was nothing more than really great s.e.x. I didn't get awestruck in her presence or want to gobble her up and never let go. Just lying next to Avery has me wanting to morph my body into hers so I'll never be away from her. Insane, right? A little creepy? I know! So why? What the h.e.l.l happened to me? Why is this happening?

”Do you have any more condoms?” When I open my eyes, her heated gaze is staring into mine. ”Figured one more time for the road.”

I have no clue what is going on, but I do know I can't get enough. I don't even answer her. I reach up, grabbing a condom out of the drawer as her hand trails up the length of me. Her hands are like soft velvet along my skin. Every spot she touches, white heat appears and then gooseflesh rises. She does something to my body no one has ever done before, and it's the most amazing thing I've ever experienced. As my c.o.c.k stands at attention, her fingers run circles around the base of me, her gaze holding mine.

”Only if you want to, that is,” she whispers and I can't answer her. My heart is in my throat. My body is so tight, I swear it's about to snap as she takes the condom from me. Wrapping her hair around my hand, I pull her to me, kissing her long and hard as she grips my c.o.c.k in her small, delicate hand. When her tongue pushes into my mouth, I'm breathless from the taste of her. She tears her mouth from mine and I think it's to put the condom on, but then her mouth is on me...and, yeah, I'm dead.

”Oh f.u.c.k,” I gasp as she sucks me to the back of her throat, her fingers dancing along the base of my c.o.c.k. Arching into her mouth, I watch as her eyes close. Her face flushes as her hair drapes along my thighs, and man, she's gorgeous. Her shoulders are thin, and her skin is blotchy with red marks. I hate them. Her skin is too soft, too beautiful to have those hard spots from our lovemaking.

Oh Jesus, did I say lovemaking?

f.u.c.k me.

But before I can dwell on that for long, she moves her mouth up and down me in a rhythm that has my toes curling and my back arching off the trampoline, wanting to go as deep as I can inside her hot mouth. Slipping my fingers into her hair, I love how long it is, how softly and perfectly it wraps around my fingers. As she increases her rhythm, I can't help it, I thrust into her mouth, unable to get enough. When she gags, though, I pause.

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