Part 13 (2/2)

”I'm not like Menehem,” I hissed. ”I'll tell the dragons not to hurt people. And we can warn people to stay away from the temple while the dragonsa””

”Rip it apart?” She advanced on me. ”Do you think that's going to work? Tear apart the temple, and Janan can't ascend?”

My eyes stung with tears, but I wouldn't cry. I wouldn't. ”I wasn't finished.”

”What else?” Whit asked.

”I read something about dragons in the books. Something that might help us.” I took a deep, steadying breath. ”The dragons have a weapon.”

The cave went so quiet I could hear the sound of snowfall.

”More than their teeth and talons?” Stef muttered darkly. ”More than their acid?”

”Yes.”

Sam closed his eyes.

I tried not to look at him. Or any of them. I tried to focus on the shadows s.h.i.+fting on the wall, but I couldn't ignore Sam's wretched expression. ”Yes, another weapon. I'm still working on translating the symbols, but it seems like this weapon is something they revere. Something that's important to them.”

”And you think what?” Stef's voice was a dagger. ”You think they'll just give you the weapon? Or use it because you ask them to? They're not part of your army.”

I pressed my mouth into a line.

”And even if they do have a weapon, why haven't they used it before now?”

”Because they're trying to use it on Janan inside the temple?” That hadn't been meant as a question, but my voice defied me and lifted at the end. ”Look, maybe I'm wrong about the weapon. And the dragons. But do you have a better plan? Do you have any plan? You got us out of Heart and you've kept us safe from drones, and I can't thank you enough for that, but what now, Stef? The rest is up to me.” I glanced at Cris and the other sylph s.h.i.+fting into the natural shadows of the cave, as though trying to avoid notice. ”I don't know if it will work. I don't know if anything will work. I have to try, though.”

No one spoke, though Sam's betrayed expression, Whit's obvious confusion, and Stef's hostility said everything.

My voice was hoa.r.s.e as I grabbed my coat. ”We leave tomorrow.”

This time, I was the one to leave the cave.

I wandered through the twilight forest, sorrow curled up inside my chest. The sadness was lodged so firmly I could hardly breathe, hardly think. Only as light bled from the world did I realize I'd forgotten a flashlight and my SED, and the only ones who might come looking for me were shadows.

The moon hung somewhere above, but it was dark tonight. I could see the outlines of trees, thanks to starlight, but soon I was lost, s.h.i.+vering inside my coat, which suddenly seemed inadequate. Ice crunched under my boots and broke off against my sleeves as I brushed past.

In the dark, s.h.i.+vering and aching with misery, I swept snow off a boulder and slumped onto the stone. My b.u.t.t froze instantly, but after everything, I was too tired to care. I was too tired to keep picking my way through the dark.

It was my nineteenth birthday.

A year ago today, I'd left Li at Purple Rose Cottage and set out to find my place in the world. Instead, I'd been chased by sylpha”sylph that had evidently been trying to befriend mea”and jumped into Rangedge Lake, where Sam rescued me. When I closed my eyes and sent my thoughts back in time, I could still feel the ache in my chest and the blackness swarming in my head as consciousness faded.

I could still feel Sam's arms wrap around me, feel him blow air into me, feel the cold wind on my wet skin as I saw him above me, smiling.

He'd brought me back to life.

And now I would take him to his death.

I bent over my knees and sobbed myself raw, coming back to the present when the s.h.i.+vers got too much. I grew hyperaware of every sound in the woods: a breeze rattling branches and rustling pine needles, birds settling into nests, and a low and melancholy moan.

Sylph.

I licked moisture back into my cold-chapped lips and tried not to let my voice shake too hard. ”Cris?” It could have been any of the other sylph, too, but I didn't know their names, or if they even had names anymore.

Heat flowed around me, making my skin p.r.i.c.kle. The sylph hummed quietly beside me. -This way.- I couldn't see where we were going. I followed the warmth, frustratingly slow because any time we turned or went around something, I had to test the air. But I was relieved to have been found, and by someone who could thaw me to the core.

Twigs cracked beneath my boots as I followed, and somewhere in the darkness, small animals scurried away. At last, I caught the faint light that looked as though it shone from around a corner. The cave. Usually at night, sylph lined up at the exit, absorbing the light so anyonea”or any creaturesa”wandering past wouldn't see it.

”Thank you for finding me,” I murmured to the sylph, then headed inside. When I squinted through the dim light, everyone appeared to be sleeping in their bags. No one stirred as I pulled off my snow-dusted coat and boots and shoved them in a corner, but when I searched for my sleeping bag and found it near Sam'sa”though not as near as it had been earliera”I caught the whites of his eyes in lantern light when he blinked.

I paused, crouched by my sleeping bag. I'd been ready to slide it away from him so I wouldn't forget when I first woke up in the morning.

But our eyes met, and for a moment I hoped he'd say something or open his sleeping bag in invitation. We'd had fights before, and reconciling kisses were always sweet. Instead, he gave a slight noda”acknowledgment of my returna”and closed his eyes.

Heart still aching, I dragged my sleeping bag away from his, crawled inside, and stared into the darkness until morning.

When the sun rose, we left the cave and headed north.

To where dragons lived.

15.

SOLITUDE.

THERE WAS NO music for a long time. Not from Sam or the sylph, and not from the woods that s.h.i.+elded us from the bitter wind. The farther we traveled, the closer and taller the trees seemed, as if they held secrets between their branches and guarded them fiercely. With few small mammals in the underbrush and even fewer birds calling in the trees, the world began to look very lonely.

My boots crunched paths on the ice-crusted ground. The crackle was sharp and startling, but the others never glanced back.

Our progress was abysmal. After two and a half weeks, we were barely halfway to our destination, though we'd had to pause for a few days after eating something that shouldn't have been eaten. Still, we should have been farther.

It was the most miserable time of my life, relieved only by evening SED calls with Sarit.

Outside the tent, I listened to Sarit tell me about the curfews and who'd been imprisoned for resisting Deborl or expressing concern about newsouls.

”It was Emil this time,” she said.

”The Soul Teller from Anid's birth?”

”Yes.” She sighed, and it sounded like she was trying not to cry. ”Everyone is so afraid here. With the earthquakes and storms, people are terrified.”

I knew. She said the same thing every day.

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