Part 4 (1/2)

FIRST REQUISITES: 1. Belief in yourself. 2. Pride in your work. 3.

Useful hands, clear eyes, and a good breath.

FOREHEAD: 1. The facade of a cosmic bagnio. 2. A screen that hides the obscene. 3. The ramparts of a portable Bastile.

FORt.i.tUDE: That quality of mind which does not care what happens so long as it does not happen to us.

FORUM: A safety-valve for letting out superfluous air. _E. g._, ”Let the Forum always be open to the people, and let the treasury always be open to us.”--From t.i.tus Livy's _Psychology of the First Contractor_.

FRA: A literary silo that feeds the world.

FRAME-UP: See Brandeisism in the last edition of the _Century Dictionary_.

FRIENDs.h.i.+P: 1. Something that by any other name would be as brittle. 2.

A tacit agreement between two enemies to work together for common swag.

3. The aspiration to boredom. 4. To do unto some one that which you would not allow him to do unto you.

FRIEND: The masterpiece of Nature.

FRAT: 1. A scheme whereby you lock the world out by shutting yourself in. 2. A non-productive plan of self-incarceration in a brain bastile by a mental midge of either s.e.x, or none. 3. A make-believe compact for purposes of piffle. (See snip-pity, top-lofty, tabascoish, supercilious.)

GAIETY: 1. An effervescence of spirits produced by the expectation or the receipt of money. 2. The emotion of a poor person on learning of the death of a rich relative.

GALLANT: 1. To remember one is a gentleman in spite of one's birth and training. 2. To give up your seat in a car to a woman, and tread on your neighbor's foot to get even. 3. To do a perfectly unselfish act from selfish motives.

GENT: A chauffeur who has a cab-driver for a chum.

GENTLEMAN: One who is gentle toward the friendless.

GLORY: The five senses of the dead.

GENIUS: 1. One who offends his time, his country and his relatives; hence, any person whose birthday is celebrated throughout the world about one hundred years after he has been crucified, burned, ostracized or otherwise put to death. 2. One who stands at both ends of a perspective; simultaneity of sight; to be one's self plus; to be synonym and antonym to everything. 3. The ability to act wisely without precedent--the power to do the right thing for the first time. 4. A capacity for evading hard work.

GIVETH: The lisping tense of give. _E. g._, ”He giveth His beloved sleep.”--From _The Ironic Sayings of Jehovah_.

GOSSIP: 1. Vice enjoyed vicariously--the sweet, subtle satisfaction without the risk. 2. The lack of a worthy theme.

GLUTTON: A poor man who eats too much, as contradistinguished from a gourmand, who is a rich man who ”lives well.”

G.o.d: 1. The John Doe of philosophy and religion. 2. The first atheist.

3. A puzzle-editor.

G.o.d AND SATAN: The Pathe Freres of existence.

G.o.dDESS: A Super-Huzzy mated with an apotheosized Super-Thug.

GOOD HABITS: Mentors and servants that regulate your sleep, your work and your thought.

GOOD SPORT: A man whose soul is equipped with automatic lubrication.