Vol 1 Chapter 15 (1/2)

Chapter 15: A Date

Li Yan safely gives birth to a boy, which Emperor Wu of Han names Bo. He also greatly rewards Princess Pingyang, Li Yan Nian and Li Guang Li. At a time when the crown prince is not set, everyone in court is starting to speculate whether the eldest son birthed by Queen Wei Liu Ju can ascended to the Eastern Palace, or will it be the beloved Liu Bo.

Because the Wei family is so powerful, Liu Ju might have the advantage, but that may not be the case. The Wei family rose to prominence because of the Emperor’s love for Queen Wei, but the same thing can happen to the Li family. Plus Liu Ju’s personality is vastly different than his father, who might one day disfavor him.

While the court is abuzz, the Wei family remains calm. General Wei Qing even enters the Palace to personally congratulate Li Yan on the birth of Liu Bo. When Liu Bo is one month old, the Emperor suddenly summons all and announces that Liu Ju will be the Crown Prince. It’s sudden but not a surprise, since the battle rages with the Xiong Nu and he needs the support from the Great General Wei, General Gong Xun He, and Huo Qu Bing. If Liu Ju wasn’t the Crown Prince, there would be no reason for these great warriors to fight for the Emperor.

During this time, Li Yan suddenly falls ill and is in a coma for three days and three nights, only saved by the attention of the royal physicians. Liu Che was so nervous and worried he did everything he could, including summoning me to the Palace to whisper in Li Yan’s ear to see if she can stir. I whisper her name, and when we are alone, I tell her “Li Yan, how can you abandon your new born baby. You still have a chance, why are you giving up?”

When Li Yan softly stirs, Liu Che is ecstatic and shows his genuine affection for her. I think to myself, this man who rules the world loves this woman and is genuinely afraid of losing her. When she wakes up and sees him, she whispers “I was so afraid I wouldn’t be able to see you again.” and then she kisses him on the palm of his hand. I walk outside thinking to myself “Li Yan, did you really get sick. Or did you make yourself sick?”

When I return to Luo Yu House, I’m exhausted but find Li Gan waiting for me. He looks devastated and I tell him not to worry, Li Yan is awake and with some rest for a few months should recover. His worry eases, but I can see what ails him, having to wait here for news when she’s fighting for her life, unable to help her.

The sun sets and the room turns dark. He remains sitting and not moving, so I try to keep myself awake. After a long time, he speaks “If this is her wish, then I will do everything in my power to make it come true for her. As long as she doesn’t get sick again.”

I lean back and sigh. Li Yan, if this illness was a coincidence, then the G.o.ds are looking out for you. This illness caused a steely man to feel apologetic, and another to vow fealty to you and help you seek the throne for your son. Li Gan is the Li family’s only heir, and his decision will surely determine the direction the family throws its support behind. If this was no coincidence, then your methods make my heart shudder. You just became a mother, and yet you can gamble with your life. A person who is so ruthless towards herself? My heart starts to feel afraid.

Li Gan and I are both deep in our own thoughts when the door suddenly opens and we both stand up in a hurry. Huo Qu Bing stares at us with a solemn expression. Li Gan and I, a man and a woman, alone in one room, that’s bad enough already, but we didn’t even light a lamp and appeared to be staring at each other in the darkness. This indeed looks very odd and hard to explain.

Li Gan sees Huo Qu Bing’s expression and smiles a bit. He shakes his head at me, bows to Huo Qu Bing, and then walks out without saying a word. Huo Qu Bing tries to control his temper and asks “When did you two become so close? You’ve been in the Palace for so long, and yet you didn’t even rest.”

I haven’t slept in two days and two nights and I’m exhausted right now. I tried to stay awake because of Li Gan, but now I don’t care anymore. I flopped back on the pallet and pulled the blanket over myself “I’m so tired. Let me sleep first and then you can punish me later if you want.”

Huo Qu Bing hesitated and then smiled. He walked over to the pallet and sat down. In my drowsy state, I head him whispering in my ear “You are that comfortable around me? But I don’t quite trust myself. What if I can’t control myself, maybe…..maybe I will……take you…..” His breath glances over my cheek and his lips are barely brus.h.i.+ng my skin. I’m so sleepy that I’ve fallen into the sweet abyss of slumber, not thinking anymore.

When I wake up, it’s past noon. I look around and suddenly remember the low voice whispering in my ear. I am stunned and immediately sit up. I look down and my clothes are intact, only my shoes have been removed and placed on the floor.

I sit there in silence, there is no one next to me. Was that a dream?

………………………………………………………..

The Lover’s Vines don’t disappoint me, a vast growth of silver and gold flowers that leave even the gardener in awe, not sure how I managed to grow it. It was easy really, I just talked to it every day, begging it to grow. Perhaps flowers can understand human emotions, knowing how much I’m longing for that man’s arrival, so it grants my wish.

Jiu Ye is in his wheelchair while I am behind him. We are strolling but my heart feels like bursting. I don’t hear Jiu Ye’s question and need to be reminded by Xiao Feng that he’s talking to me. I chat with him and we arrive at my courtyard. I make a face at Xiao Feng, who announces he’s off to explore the rest of Luo Yu House now. Jiu Ye lets him go, and Xiao Feng makes a money sign towards me first before running off.

The fragrance of the flowers. .h.i.t us the moment I open the door. He asks if I’ve planted Gold Silver Flowers but I’m too nervous to answer. An entire garden of Lover’s Vines in the sun glistening with gold, silver, and green, captivating and enchanting. He admires them and commends me on doing such a superb job of growing them.

I stare at the flowers before calming myself down “Do you know this flower has another name?” He was silent for a long time “In the Winter the leaves remain green, so it’s also called “Enduring Winter”.”

I smile sadly “Why are you avoiding the other name? Because the twisting flowers look like lovers dancing, so people also call them Lover’s Vines.”

He laughed “I momentarily forgot and just remember their medicinal name. You didn’t ask me here today just to look at flowers. Lets go see the willows growing by the lake. Let’s go walk by the lake.”

I grab his hand, which is about to wheel away “I really just invited you here to view the flowers. I don’t care if you think I am being bold and shameless. I need to tell you how I feel. I planted these Lover’s Vines for you two Falls ago. It’s almost two years now, Jiu Ye. I…..I like you. I want to marry you. I want to always be able to view these flowers with you. And not just me all alone watching these lovers dancing on the vines.”

His hand shakes, cold as ice, and he stares into my eyes. I see the pain and the fear, all the complicated emotions tied together. I don’t understand. My hand holding his is starting to get cold. I plead with him silently: I have given my heart to you. Please treasure it. Please. Treasure. It.

Jiu Ye suddenly jerks his hand out of mine and avoids my eyes. He starsd ahead at the Lover’s Vines and spoke clearly, like every word needs all his strength to get out “I am not used to viewing flowers with anybody. I’m sure you’ll find someone to view flowers with you.”

My heart crashed on the ground, the second it hit shattering into pieces. My hand is still outstretched and suspended in the air. It’s like I want to grab onto something, but my hand touches nothing, placed in an odd position.

He tried to wheel himself away but it’s like his arms have no strength so he doesn’t move. I grabbed his sleeve “Why? Has it been just me all this time? You have no feelings for me? What are you afraid of? Your leg? I don’t care about these things, Jiu Ye. How far a person walks in their lifetime is not determined by their legs, but by their heart.”

He turned his head and refused to look at me. He pulled his sleeve out of my hand and kept repeating over and over “Yu Er, you are so wonderful. There is bound to be someone who is willing to view the flowers with you.”

I watched as his sleeve disappeared from my hand little by little, and I cannot stop it. So there is something in this world harder to capture than a pa.s.sing cloud.

An icy cold voice rings from behind us “There is indeed someone who is willing to view flowers with her.”

I remain frozen on the spot and continue staring at my hand. How can he be so cruel as to push it away? Time and time again. So the biggest sadness isn’t heartbreak, it’s unending despair.

Huo Qu Bing walks up to Jiu Ye “Meng Jiu of s.h.i.+ Enterprises?” His face is ashen but his stance proud and arrogant.

Jiu Ye acknowledges him with a very conflicted expression, his face turning whiter “Yu Er, your friend is here, so I’ll be going now” and wheeled himself away.

Huo Qu Bing spoke up “My name is Huo Qu Bing” and Jiu Ye stopped for a moment, before continuing on his way. He murmured “I’ve long heard of your reputation, what a pleasure it is to meet you today” without turning back.

“He’s gone already” Huo Qu Bing lightly told me. I still don’t move, so he grabs me. I jerk my hand out of his and roars at him “I don’t need you to concern yourself with my business. Who told you to enter my house? Get out!”

His hands suddenly fisted and he punched the vines “Don’t forget you asked me to come view the flowers. Lover’s Vines? You only told me it was called Gold Silver Flowers.”

A few of the bamboo sticks snap, and the Lover’s Vines in front of me shudder and then collapse. A sudden loud roar later, the entire vine patch has fallen in a flurry of gold and silver.

I stand there staring disbelieving. How could it collapse? Two years I’ve carefully tended to it. How did it fall so easily? Did the dream just evaporate?

I glared at Huo Qu Bing, who also looked stunned. He was staring at the vines with confusion in his eyes “Yu Er, look at these complicated intertwining vines? Don’t you think it’s just like life.”

………………………………………………………

I asked the gardener to try and save the Gold Silver Flowers, but the main vine has been damaged and the flowers continue to wilt one after another, with the leaves turning yellow. I watched them slowly die before me. The things I believed in my heart was also slowly dying.

Hong Gu tries to convince me to see the s.h.i.+ family members, and even the ill Wu Ye tries to meet with me, but I refuse to see anyone. I took a bucket of water and splashed on the vines, apologizing for them suffering because of our complicated lives. Hong Gu says s.h.i.+ Enterprises is her master and boss, and right those three heads are outside waiting for me for an entire day already, which is unheard of.

I finally allow them inside. I bow to Tian Cao, Sheng Xing, and Jing Yen, and they ask if I’m drawing a clear boundary with them now. I take a deep breath, my throat hoa.r.s.e “Jiu Ye would rather lose money on his businesses but he insists on repaying my money right now. It appears that the s.h.i.+ Enterprises is the one who wants to make a clear boundary with me.”

They have nothing to say to that, but Jing Yen pipes up “Xiao Yu, what happened between you and Jiu Ye? He was fine coming here, but when he got home his face was ashen like he got sick. He’s locked himself in his study for days now, only telling us to repay your loan immediately.”

My hand clenches and my nail digs into my palm. They look at each other and tell me they understand how hard it is for me. The normally taciturn Sheng Xing suddenly speaks up “Xiao Yu, give Jiu Ye more time. A lot of emotional knots can’t get untangled in a day or two.”

I shake my head “I tried to hint at him but he keeps evading me. I try to get close but he keeps letting me get close before violently pus.h.i.+ng me away. I ask myself why, but I can never read his expression. It’s not so simple. If it wasn’t for his legs, I would have told him long ago how I feel. But he still keeps pus.h.i.+ng me away. I’m just a girl, and I’m telling you all this today. You grew up with him, do you know why?”