Part 27 (1/2)

”I will make the bargain,” Jot said firmly.

”The Gorgon can sub for your wife in h.e.l.l,” t.i.ttle added, nailing it down.

”Then I am constrained to agree,” Humfrey said, spreading his hands as if outflanked.

Lacuna saw that Humfrey's plan had worked. He had avoided the rigged contest and obtained the release of Rose half time, without running afoul of the problem of having two live wives in Xanth at the same time. He had outsmarted the all-powerful Demon.

Jot turned toward her. ”I wouldn't say that,” he said.

t.i.ttle also turned toward her. ”I would say he just makes sense,” she said.

Lacuna was aghast. The Demon knew what was in their minds! So Humfrey had not prevailed by trickery but by offering the Demon a good compromise.

Jot extended his hand, and a rolled scroll appeared in it. ”Here is the Agreement,” he said.

t.i.ttle extended her hand, and a huge feathered quill appeared in it. ”Sign it,” she said.

Jot unrolled the scroll and held it against the wall, covering part of Lacuna's ongoing printed narrative. t.i.ttle gave Humfrey the feather.

Lacuna peered over Humfrey's shoulder to read the scroll. It said, in script more elaborate than she could render: It is hereby Agreed that Good Magician Humfrey shall be allowed to exchange one wife for another in h.e.l.l, et cetera and so forth, There was a decorative line below, separating the text from the s.p.a.ce for signature. Humfrey squinted at it through his spectacles, then shrugged and signed.

Then Jot took the quill and signed: Demon.

t.i.ttle took it and signed X(A/N)th. Then she handed the quill to Lacuna.

”But I'm not part of this!” Lacuna protested.

”You have to witness it,” the Gorgon explained. ”I can't; I'm a relative.”

Oh. Lacuna brought the quill to the paper. But something nagged her. ”I'm not sure that-”

”Sign it,” Humfrey said shortly.

So, doubtfully, Lacuna signed it too.

”Well, that's that,” Jot said.

”Yes, that's that,” t.i.ttle agreed.

”So let's get on with the exchange,” Humfrey said.

”What exchange?” Jot asked.

”Yes, what?” t.i.ttle added.

”The exchange of wives,” Humfrey said. ”As agreed.”

Jot and t.i.ttle exchanged one glance. ”I think he didn't read the small print,” Jot said.

”Yes, I think he didn't,” t.i.ttle agreed.

”Small print?” the Gorgon asked, her veil twisting in perplexity.

Jot extended his hand, and a big magnifying gla.s.s appeared in it. ”Use this,” he said.

”Yes, read the small print,” t.i.ttle said.

Humfrey took the gla.s.s and held it over the decorative line. The line expanded, and turned out to be two lines of very small print, now legible: But only in the Changes of Moon On days beginning with Letter N ” 'But only in the Changes of Moon, on days beginning with Letter N,' ” Lacuna read aloud, getting it right for her own text. ”But when does the moon change?”

”And what day of the week begins with the letter N?” the Gorgon asked. She looked at Humfrey. ”Dear, this is nonsense.”

”Tough udder,” Jot said smugly.

”You signed,” t.i.ttle said smugly.

Humfrey shrugged. ”Did you suppose I got to be the Magician of Information without understanding the concept of small print?” he asked. ”It can merely modify, not reverse the contract; that's according to the rules demons follow. We have only to interpret it.”

”Well, go home and interpret it,” Jot said.

”Yes, and stop bothering me,” t.i.ttle added.

Humfrey waggled a finger at them. ”Not until I have completed my mission. If I leave beforehand, I will default.” He turned to the Gorgon. ”You interpret the Changes of Moon.” Then he turned to Lacuna. ”You find the days beginning with N. ”

Lacuna exchanged two glances with the Gorgon. Then both fell to concentrating. Lacuna thought about the days of the week, and found none that began with N. There were two beginning with S, two with T, and one each with F, M and W. There was a month beginning with N, NoRemember, but no day. Yet it seemed that there had to be a day. What could it be?

Then she suffered a blinding inspiration. There were” N days-if the days of the month were numbered alphabetically! The ninth and the nineteenth.

”Lacuna has gotten her notion,” Humfrey remarked, blinking as the flash of light faded.

Then a flashbulb went off just above the Gorgon's head, making Lacuna blink. The other part of it had been solved.

”The moon changes every month, just like a woman,” the Gorgon said. ”So it's every month.”

”On the ninth or nineteenth,” Lacuna added.

”And what is today?” Humfrey inquired as if bored.

”The ninth of OctOgre,” Lacuna said.

”Then what in h.e.l.l's annex are we waiting for?” Humfrey demanded irritably.

Jot and t.i.ttle exchanged half a glance and half a shrug. It was evident that the Demon's little trick had been found out. He had tried to out wait Humfrey and not succeeded; so he had tried to fool him with the appearance of the little twins, and not succeeded; so he had tried to pose an unanswerable question and not succeeded. This contract was the fourth trick which had failed, thanks to Humfrey's determination and insight. Would there be another trick? If so, what would it be?

Lacuna looked up. The others were looking at her. Oh, no-she had been automatically transcribing her thoughts, and they were-now being printed on the wall. There were no secrets here!

”There will be one more trick,” Humfrey said. ”But it will be possible to navigate it, if we are sensible. The Demon can not actually cheat. There must always be a way through, however devious, or he defaults.”

Only one more trick. That was a relief! Lacuna turned away from the wall, preferring not to see her thoughts displayed. Fortunately she was such a dull person that no one else was really interested in her thoughts anyway.

”Right you are,” Humfrey agreed absently.