Part 17 (1/2)

The little French doctor from the Battery, who had once helped me change a tyre, came running up and I covered the scratched side of my face lest he should get too much of a shock. ”Je suis joliment dans la soupe,” I said, and saw him go as white as a sheet. ”These Frenchmen are very sympathetic,” I thought, for it had dawned on me what they were crying about by that time.

Just then an ambulance train came down the line and the two English doctors were fetched. A tourniquet which seemed like a knife, and hurt terribly, was applied as well as the bootlace. I was also given some morphia. ”This will hurt a little,” he said as he pushed in the needle, which I thought distinctly humorous. As if a p.r.i.c.k from a hypodermic could be anything in comparison with what was going on ”down there”

where I hadn't courage to look! His remark had one good effect though, because I thought: ”If he thinks _that_ will hurt there can't be much to fuss over down there.”

Would the ambulance never arrive? I wondered if we were always so long--which F.A.N.Y. would come? ”She's cranked up by now and on the way, probably as far as the bridge,” I thought. I drove all the way down in my own mind and yet she did not arrive, but they had 'phoned to the French hospital in the town and not the Convoy. I did not know this till I saw the French car arrive.

It seemed an age. Gaspard never moved once from his cramped position and kept saying soothingly from time to time: ”Allons, p't.i.t chou, mon pauvre pet.i.t pigeon, ca viendra tout a l'heure, he la pet.i.te.”

At last the ambulance came. I dreaded being lifted, but those soldiers raised me so tenderly the wrench was not half as bad as I had antic.i.p.ated. I had been there just over forty minutes. Then began the journey in the ambulance. The men gave me a fine salute as I was taken off and I waved good-bye. One of the Sisters from the train came in the car with me and also the little French doctor whose hand I hung on to most of the way, and which incidentally must have been like pulp when we arrived.

As luck would have it the driver was a new man, and neither the doctor nor the sister knew the way, so I had to give the directions. The doctor was all for taking me to the French military hospital, but I asked to be taken to the Casino.

”So this is what the men go through every day,” I thought, as we were into a hole and out again with a b.u.mp and the pain became almost too much to bear. The doctor swore at the driver, and I took another grip of his hand. ”Bien difficile de ne pas faire ca,” I murmured, for I knew he had really manoeuvred it well. The constant give of the springs jiggling endlessly up and down, up and down, was as trying as anything.

The trouble was I knew every hole in that road and soon we had to cross railway lines! The sister, who was a stranger too, began to worry how she would find her way back to the train, but I a.s.sured her once arrived at the Casino, she only had to walk up to our camp to get a F.A.N.Y.

car. ”I hope there won't be many people there when I'm pulled out,” I thought, ”I hate being stared at in such a beastly mess,” above all I hated a fuss.

Now we had come to the railway lines. ”What would it have been like without morphia?” I wondered. Of course the drawbridge was up and that meant at least ten minutes wait till the s.h.i.+ps went through. My luck seemed dead out. At last I heard the familiar clang as it rattled into place, and we were over.

I dared not close my eyes, as I had a sort of feeling I'd never be able to open them again. ”Only up the slope and then I'm there. If I can't keep them open till then, I'm done.” The pain was getting worse again, and from what the sister said I gathered something down there had begun to haemorrhage once more. Still no thought of the truth ever dawned on me.

At last we arrived and slowly backed into place. I could not help seeing the grim humour of the situation; I had driven so many wounded men there myself. The Colonel, who must have heard, for he was waiting, looked very white and worried, and Leather, one of the d.u.c.h.ess' drivers, started visibly as I was pulled out. I was told after that my complexion, or what could be seen of it, was ashen grey in colour and if my eyes had not been open they would have thought the worst. I was carried into the big hall and there my beloved Wuzzy found me. I heard a little whine and felt a warm tongue licking my face--luckily he had not been with me that morning.

”Take that ---- dog away, someone,” cried the Colonel, who was peevish in the extreme. ”He's not a ---- dog,” I protested, and then up came a Padre who asked gravely, ”What are you, my child?” Thinking I was now fairly unrecognisable by this time with the Frenchman's hanky round my head, etc., I replied, ”A F.A.N.Y., of course!” This completely scandalized the good Padre. When he had recovered, he said, ”No, you mistake me, what religion I mean?”

”He wants to know what to bury me under,” I thought, ”what a thoroughly cheerful soul!” ”C. of E.,” I replied as per ident.i.ty disc. He then took my home address, which seemed an unnecessary fuss, and I was left in peace. Captain C. was there as well and came over to the stretcher.

”I've broken both legs,” I announced, ”will I be able to ride again?”

”Of course you will,” he said.

”Sure?” I asked.

”Rather,” he replied, and I felt comforted.

I was then carried straight through ward I. into the operating theatre.

The men in bed looked rather startled, and Barratt, a man I had driven and been visiting since, was near the door. What he said is hardly repeatable. When the British Tommy is much moved he usually becomes thoroughly profane! I waved to him as I disappeared through the door into the theatre.

I was speedily undressed. d.i.c.ky appeared mysteriously from somewhere and was a brick. The room seemed to be full of nurses and orderlies and then I went slipping off into oblivion as the chloroform took effect (my first dose and at that time very welcome) and at last I was in a land where pain becomes obliterated in one vast empty s.p.a.ce.

I woke that afternoon and of course wondered where I was. Everything seemed to be aching and throbbing at once. I tried to move, but I felt as if I was clamped to the bed. ”This is terrible,” I thought, ”I must be having a nightmare.” Then I saw the cradle covering my legs. ”What could it be?” I wondered, and then in a flash the scenes of that morning (or was it a week ago?) came back to me. I wondered if my back was all right and felt carefully down the side. No, there was no bandage, and I sighed with relief, though it ached like fury. I could feel the top of the wooden splints on the one leg but nothing but bandages on the other.

My head had been sewn up, also my lip, and a nice tight bandage replaced the hanky.

It was thumping wildly and presently an unseen figure gave me something very cool to sip out of a feeding mug. Things straightened out a bit after that, and I saw there were quant.i.ties of flowers in the room, jugfuls in fact, which had been sent to cheer me along. Then something in my leg, the one that was hurting most, gave a fearful tug and a jump and I drew in my breath with a sobbing gasp. What could it be? It felt just as if someone had tugged it on purpose, and it took ages to settle down again. I looked mutely at my nurse for an explanation, and she put a cool hand on mine.

It was the severed nerve, and I learnt to dread those involuntary jumps that came so suddenly from nowhere and seized one like a deadly cramp.

Everything, including my back, was one vast ache punctuated by those appalling nerve jumps that set every other one in my body tingling.