Part 10 (1/2)

THE BOOK OF THE PLAY (_as managers like it_).--”All places taken for the next fortnight.”

When actors complain that all they require is ”parts,” they generally tell the exact truth.

[Ill.u.s.tration: SCENE FROM SHAKSPEARIAN PANTOMIME

”Where got'st thou that goose?--look!”

(_Macbeth_, Act V., Sc. 3.)]

[Ill.u.s.tration: A DISENCHANTMENT.--_Grandpapa._ ”_What_? Bob in love with Miss Fontalba, the comic actress at the Parthenon?” _Bob (firing up)._ ”Yes, grandpa! And if you've got a word to say against that lady, it had better not be said in my presence, that's all!” _Grandpapa._ ”_I_ say a word _against_ her! Why, bless your heart, my dear boy! I was head over ears in love with her _myself_--_when I was your age!_”]

[Ill.u.s.tration: THE PROBLEM PLAY.--_New Woman (with the hat)._ ”No! _My_ principle is simply _this_--if there's a _demand_ for these plays, it must be _supplied_!” _Woman not New (with the bonnet)._ ”Precisely! Just as with the bull-fights in Spain!”

[_Scores_

[Ill.u.s.tration: CHURCH THEATRES FOR COUNTRY VILLAGES--THE BLAMELESS BALLET

[”_Mr. Chamberlain has expressed himself in sympathy with the scheme of the Rev. Forbes Phillips for running theatres in connection with the churches in country villages._”]

There would, our artist imagines, be no difficulty in obtaining willing coryphees among the pew-openers and philanthropic spinsters of the various parishes.]

[Ill.u.s.tration: _Mr. M'Chrustie (in the was.h.i.+ng-room of the Minerva Club)._ ”Look here, waiter, what's the meaning of this? These brushes are as beastly grimy as if they'd been blacking boots----!” _Waiter._ ”Yes, sir: it's them members from the 'Junior Theshpian,' sir--as are 'ere now, sir. They do dye theirselves to that degree----!”

[_Mr. M'C. rushes off and writes furiously to the Committee!_

_Q._ What were the ”palmy” days of the drama?

_A._ When they were first-rate hands at acting.