Part 4 (2/2)

Big Trouble Dave Barry 37260K 2022-07-22

”b.i.t.c.h,” said Arthur.

”Could somebody please tell me what happened?” asked Eliot.

”I was trying to kill Jenny,” said Matt, ”and her mom jumped me.”

”Hi,” said Anna, giving Eliot a little wave. ”I'm Anna Herk. I didn't mean to hurt him.”

”Hi,” said Eliot, waving back. ”Listen, I'm really sorry about this. I thought it was, I mean, the way Matt described it, it was just supposed to be a game.”

”Hey,” said Anna, making a what-can-you-do gesture. ”Kids.”

”Yeah,” agreed Eliot. ”Kids.” Eliot was noticing that Anna had extremely green eyes.

”Your kid's going to jail,” said Arthur Herk, heading for the bar.

”Monica?” said Officer Kramitz.

”What?” said Monica.

'Take a look at this,” said Officer Kramitz, feeling very happy about this case again. He was crouched by the TV set, pointing at something inside the gaping opening where the picture tube had been. Monica went over and saw that he was pointing at a small, perfectly round hole in the back of the plastic cabinet. Looking behind the TV, she saw a matching hole in the wall. She went around to the other side of the wall, which was the dining room; there was a hole in the wall, and another hole in the wall on the opposite side of the room.

”Jesus,” she said. She went back into the family room.

”OK,” she said, ”Let's go over what happened again, and this time, let's include the part about who shot the TV set.”

Arthur Herk, pouring a drink, jerked his head up.

”Shot it?” said Anna. ”n.o.body shot it.” it?” said Anna. ”n.o.body shot it.”

”It's a squirt gun squirt gun,” said Matt.

”Listen,” said Monica. ”There's a bullet hole in the wall there, and I want to know, right now, how ... Wait a minute.”

Monica turned and went over to the window next to the sliding-gla.s.s door and stood for a moment, staring. Eliot, Matt, Anna, Jenny, and Officer Kramitz moved closer to see what she was looking at. What she was looking at was a neat, round hole in the gla.s.s.

”Oh my G.o.d G.o.d,” said Jenny.

”Is that a bullet bullet hole?” asked Eliot. hole?” asked Eliot.

”Looks like,” said Monica.

”So,” said Matt, ”like, a bullet came through this room through this room? With us here here?”

”Oh my G.o.d G.o.d,” said Jenny, again. Anna hugged her.

At the bar, Arthur Herk went pale.

”Matt,” said Monica, ”when you and your imaginary Mend were outside, did you see anybody else?”

”No,” said Matt.

”Mrs. Herk,” said Monica, ”does anybody live here besides you and your daughter and your husband?”

”Well,” said Anna, ”there's ... My G.o.d, where's Nina where's Nina?”

Nina could smell beer. It wasn't a bad smell; in fact, it reminded her of her father, when he came home late from work on Friday and sometimes she would sit on his lap and he would sing her songs, and on his breath was the sweet smell of the cerveza cerveza.

She could smell it now, but it wasn't her father; k was somebody with a different voice, a higher voice, and he was saying, ”You OK? Lady? Lady? You OK?”

Nina opened her eyes, and she saw a man, but she didn't scream, because she was not afraid of this man. He had a beard and sad brown eyes, kind of like Roger the dog's, and she could see in them that he had a sad brown soul, and that he would not hurt her.

Puggy thought that Nina was beautiful. Just beautiful, like an angel in a blue nightgown, or a woman on the TV. He could not believe that a woman as beautiful as this was in his tree. He knew-he was sure-that she was the reason for the flute music, because that music was as beautiful as this woman was. He had never really loved a woman, or even really talked to one, but he believed that he loved this woman very much.

”You OK?” he said again.

”Si,” said Nina. ”Yes.”

Spanish, thought Puggy. He would die for this woman.

”What happen to me?” she asked, tentatively touching her forehead, discovering a large and tender lump.

”That guy ran into you,” said Puggy.

”Senor Herk,” said Nina. ”He chase me.”

Whoever Senor Herk was, Puggy hated him.

”I got the gun,” said Puggy.

”Gun?” said Nina. She p.r.o.nounced it ”gon.” Puggy thought it was a beautiful way to p.r.o.nounce it. He wanted this woman to stay in his tree forever, p.r.o.nouncing things.

”The gun the other guy had,” said Puggy. ”I got it.”

”There was another?” asked Nina.

”There was two guys,” said Puggy. ”They're gone, though.”

Nina looked around her. She was lying on something hard and flat, like wood, but she was outside, with branches all around.

”Where is this?” she asked.

”This is my tree,” Puggy said.

Nina sat up a little bit, and saw that she was in a tree. ”Well,” said Puggy, ”it's not my tree. But I live here.”

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