Part 41 (1/2)
”These are my parents, Julie and Garret.” I point to my parents, who look as stunned as me.
”It's great to meet you both,” she gushes. ”I'm Chelsea from, well-here, but I told my parents I wanted to live away from home, it was really important to me. You're from Houston, right?”
”Yeah,” I agree, stepping into the small kitchen area just inside the door.
I set the box on the floor and look around at the place I'll call home for the next year. It's smaller than I expected, but it's nice. When I face Chelsea, I notice the hopeful look in her face, the one that says she wants to be friends. I recognize the look because that used to be me, before I quit trying. I'm a terrible person because the first thing that comes to mind is that I don't have time for friends or room for them in my life. But considering half of my circle lives out of state, I don't really have the luxury of being choosy right now.
”Which one is mine?” I ask and point to the two doors that are closed.
”Oh, you're over there on the right. Do you need any help?”
”Thanks, I think we've got it,” I smile warmly. ”So what's your major?”
”I want to study marketing-at least that's what I want to do today,” she smiles. ”What about you?”
”Psych.” I smile and make a face because I'm not sure what I'm getting myself into with that one.
”Wow, you already know what you want to do?” she asks with smile.
”Laila?” I hear the familiar sound of Haden's voice call from somewhere outside so I excuse myself before I step out to locate him.
”Up here,” I call down and he looks up from the floor below.
”Top, huh?” he teases and I nod.
He carries the box that he loaded in his car and makes his way up the steps until he's standing in my doorway. He brings it into the living room and sets it on the coffee table, but I find my roommate's blatant perusal of his body irritating. I resist the urge to hike my leg up to pee on him and mark my territory, because I'm sure it's frowned upon. Chelsea walks over and introduces herself, but he's barely paying attention as he helps me bring the boxes into my new room.
”Can you show me what boxes you need?” he asks, which throws me off because he knows which boxes I need. All of them. This is code for 'come with me.'
I meet him outside the door and together we walk downstairs to my car to grab more of my things. Haden takes my hand in his and stares at it with a sad smile.
”What's wrong?” I ask, concern evident in my tone.
”It's gonna be hard to leave you,” he says.
”It's hard to let you leave,” I answer. ”I wish you were going to school here.”
”But I'm less than two hours away,” he responds.
”I know,” I mutter quietly.
”Hey,” he tugs at my hand, stopping me so I face him and gently lifts my chin with his fingers, ”what's two hours? Ninety miles? It's nothing. Besides, you can't get rid of me so easy.”
He leans down and kisses my sadness away, at least for now. When we separate, I smile shyly and nod to acknowledge his words before we finally grab some boxes and start the journey back up to my place.
”Where do you want this?” Mom asks, holding up the blanket Grandma knitted for me when I was a kid. It's my comfort blanket when I'm sick, sad, or tired.
”On the bed is fine-if you can get Haden to get off it.”
Mom laughs and tosses the blanket on top of him, along with a few of my stuffed animals I decided to bring last minute. Haden grabs the bear he won for me at the carnival and holds it up in the air.
”You stole my bear.”
”That's mine, Searle. You gave it to me.”
”Maybe I want it back,” he challenges.
”I have custody of him until I see you again,” I say in my no-nonsense tone. ”And when will that be?”
He sits up and looks at his phone; when his eyes meet mine, I know that it's time and I do my best to be happy. Mom notices that the mood has s.h.i.+fted and takes Dad aside to give us a moment.
Haden walks over and wraps his arms around me in what will likely go down as the saddest hug I've ever encountered. I hate goodbyes. Watching Joey and Cole leave hurt so much and I've barely gotten over it, but Haden isn't just my friend, he's my boyfriend. The pain in my chest is hard to ignore.
”I have to go,” he rasps.
”I'll walk you out.”
Dad shakes his hand and Mom pulls him in for a hug, wis.h.i.+ng him good luck.
”We'll see you soon,” she says.
I thread my fingers through Haden's and he says a quick goodbye to Chelsea as we walk out the door. Neither of us rush the trek to his car, but we don't say anything either until we are standing at the driver side door. He rests against the car and I instinctively lean in to him and allow him to hold me once more before he leaves. I bury my face against his chest and he runs his hand up and down my back.
Don't go. I want to say the words, but I won't.
”This year with you has been everything I hoped,” he says.
”I'm so glad that you let me in,” I say and turn my face to look into his. ”I don't want to let you go, but I have to. I never expected to be able to love you the way I do, and it's been worth everything.”
”Never let me go,” he cups my face in his hands and brings his lips to mine, ”because I'm never letting you go.”
”You can't know that,” I argue halfheartedly.
”I'll tell you what I know: we were friends first, and that's something that will never change. You're stuck with me.”
”I can handle that.” I smile. ”Do you really think we could be that one couple that makes the long distance thing work?”
”Why not us?” He raises his eyebrow and grins.
”We're so going to be that couple that makes everyone else jealous because we're so awesome.” I wink and back my words with all the confidence I can muster.
”Yeah we are,” he agrees and kisses me until all I can think about is the next time I get to kiss him again.
I move away and give him room to get into his car, watching him start the engine. He closes the door and I lean in for one last kiss before he closes it. Slowly, he backs out of the parking spot and I stand rooted in place as I watch his car disappear from my view and allow my tears to fall.