2 Kami-sama, Y U Do Dis? (2/2)

”What? What madness is this?!” These words slipped out of the mouthless Diesel, who had given up trying to figure out how a truck could speak.

”You are in Kami-sama's garage.”

Diesel spun around in a U-turn trying to locate the new voice that echoed.

”Up here, Truck-kun.”

Tilting his vision upward, Diesel saw the giant, old man floating above him once again.

”AHHH!!! YOU AGAIN! WHY DID YOU DO THIS TO ME?!” The truck blared out, causing Kami-sama to recoil in panic.

”Sorry, it wasn't intentional. Even us Gods can make a mistake, especially when we're tired and it's the end of the day. Besides, the system sent you to me cause the first thing out of your mouth was Japanese, and you didn't bother to say anything to fix it. I could've sent you to someone else, or at least, paused to go grab my English hat!”

For the first time, Diesel had regretted how his tendency to add cringy broken Japanese to his English speech pattern had resulted in this tragic mistake. All he could do was blame himself and the blasted anime that made him think it was neat to talk as such.

”But wait…couldn't you have seen that I was obviously human? I mean, I can talk and stuff.”

Kami-sama shook his head. ”So what? Cats and dogs talk, just like humans do. Just the other day, I had to reincarnate someone who had previously been a vending machine. I was fighting off exhaustion, so with a name like Diesel, I was like, whatever, a truck will do!”

Diesel couldn't argue with that. At least, he could move on his own, unlike a vending machine.

”Then, change me back! I don't wanna be stuck like this!”

Once again, Kami-sama shook his head. ”No can do. There are limits to my power. I can't just fix a reincarnation once it's been done. For you to change back, you'll have to accumulate karma through your current life. Once enough has been collected, then I can strike you down with some lightning and reincarnate you into something else.”

Diesel's metaphorical heart sank. He would have to stay like this for a while? How long? How long would he have to suffer like this? He turned towards Kami-sama to beg him for some help, but he was already on top of it.

”Hold your horses. I'm already here cause I planned to help you with this mistake. I can't change you back yet, but I can give you something to do that will boost your karma quickly.”

”What is it? I'll do it! Whatever! Just lay it on me!” The desperation could be felt even when the words came from an expressionless vehicle.

Kami-sama coughed to clear his throat. ”Alright then. You'll be put in charge of sending people to alternate worlds. I believe that you would refer to it as isekai-ing.”

”Eh?...EHHHHH!!!!” Diesel shouted as the realization of a meme otaku merely joked about was about to come true, and by his hands to boot. ”But…but…how do I accomplish that?”

”Why...the same way as any divine business would – by getting notifications of assignments which I review and approve. Then, all that's left is to send a Truck-kun on-site to do the job. That is where you come in.”

”But…running over people and sending them to another world…that's-”

”Most of those people were hell-bound anyways. If they had stayed in their world, they would've caused some damage to society. Sending them to another world is their second chance to reform themselves or die from the consequences of their actions. Basically, the service sends them to a place where they have lost the gifts that they had been born into previously.”

”I dunno…I would feel kind of bad if I sent someone innocent into the whims of fate. Just look at what happened to me.”

”Well…I'm usually more careful with that. I was actually tired because I had put so much into scrutinizing the right people to isekai.” Kami-sama sheepishly scratched his chin as he looked away. ”In any case, that's your fastest ticket back to living as a human again.”

Diesel sighed. Not like he had any other choice. He was already a freaking truck after all. How much worse could it be?

”Okay, deal.”

”Alrighty, then.” With a wave of his arms, Kami-sama sent a swirl of magic around Diesel.

Since trucks had no nerves, he couldn't feel what was happening to him. All he could do was wait for the magical twister around him to die down. When it did, he moved forward a bit.

”Hey, I feel…lighter. More compact.”

Kami-sama nodded. ”Of course, you do. I turned you into a compact cargo truck for better maneuverability. Can't have a semi-truck sitting around. Takes up too much space. Though, you can change back if you wish for it so. Just one of the magical abilities bestowed upon you.”

”Ooh! What else?” Somehow, Diesel was starting to get into this.

”I'll tell you in time. They are mainly to aid you on your job, so nothing too fancy.”

Kami-sama shrank down from his giant form to the size of a normal human as he floated down to the ground. With a click of the heels, he landed and gave a slight bow of his waist, greeting Diesel as his new boss.

”Welcome, Diesel-kun. Your new life begins as part of the Otherworld Isekai Service.”