The Report The Earth Invasion In-Charges Subordinate Sent Is Extremely Strange. Oneshot (1/2)
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The Report the Earth Invasion In-Charge's Subordinate Sent Is Extremely Strange.
Author : Ninja no Satou
Synopsis :
The report that an alien with the plan of invading Earth had written and a mail a woman had sent to her lover got mixed up and became strange.
Ralrun from the planet of Nubedov, who had been entrusted to the Earth Invasion In-Charge, wrote a report to his boss, the Commander-in Chief Buglatt. Ralrun strongly advocated to 『Commence an All-Out Attack on Earth Right Away and Bring Mankind to Ruin』in the report.
The contents of the report are as follows.
Respected Lord[1] General Buglatt
Earth Invasion In-Charge Ralrun
Five years have pa.s.sed since I undertook the duty of the invasion of earth and began investigating this planet.
During the period of these five years, I have taken all the data on mankind as well as all living things.
Be it voraciously reading the news day after day, investigating the history of humans, repeatedly dissecting humans, I have thoroughly studied up.
As a result, I understood that even the greatest brains amongst the mankind haunting this planet, without even having much muscle power, are existences equivalent to worms to us Nubedovians.
In spite of that, this inferior human race has imprudently monopolised this abundant planet「Earth」as if it were they own it.
It seems, as Commander-in Chief said five years ago, we Nubedovians must control this planet at once after all!
The way of thinking of the King who wants coexistence and co-prosperity is too pacifist!
There is but a single organisation that has a force that can resist our attack on this earth. Therefore, we must quickly launch an all-out attack before the invasion force crosses over to the destination! We must engage them in a bloodbath!
I have already made preparations for the missile carrying the genocidal bomb above the satellite orbit.
If we launch it, it will surely reduce a continent to ashes in ten seconds.
While trying to escape, even the best of friends will be scrambling for the limited resources, hating each other, killing each other, in despair due to heat and thirst and mankind will surely die slowly!
It might be better to annihilate them all at once, but I think it will be fun to see them killing each other.
The great Lord General Buglatt!
Now take a wise decision! Release the hammer of justice on this stupid mankind right away!
Glory to our mother planet Nubedov!!!
ラールン
Ralrun
＊＊＊＊＊
At the same time, feeling lonely being left behind by her war photographer lover, Aoi decided to write a mail to her lover. In it, Aoi emotionally wrote about 「Cooking, My Colleague Getting Married and I Want You to Quickly Come Home to j.a.pan」.
However, due to a computer virus and by accident, Ralrun's report and the mail 「Aoi」wrote got mixed together.
Because of that, the mail that reached the Commander-in-Chief Buglatt became somewhat strange.
＊＊＊
★In Planet Nubedov
Commander-in-Chief Buglatt : 「Ohh, the report from Ralrun came. He made me wait for five years, so…… . The preparations for the Earth Invasion must be thorough, right? Kukuku, well well.」
To Buglatt
《Oi, you're addressing me casually all of a sudden, are you?》
From the Earth Invasion In-Charge Blue Ralrun
《What's with the primary colour!》
Five years and three months have pa.s.sed since I undertook the duty of the invasion of earth and began investigating this onion.
《What the heck were you[2] doing in these five years!?》
During the period of these five years, I have taken all the data on Lord General Buglatt.
《Eh? Me!?[3]》i
Be it voraciously reading Buglatt day after day, investigating the history of Buglatt , repeatedly dissecting Buglatt, I have thoroughly studied up.