Part 22 (2/2)
”Oh yes,” nodded the woman vigorously, delighted to be promoted to a speaking part as she searched through her handbag.
She pulled out a half-empty pocket-sized packet of Kleenex.
”Sorry it's not a full pack,” she said. ”I had to use some at Connie Waring's Wake yesterday. Spilt sherry trifle down me front I did. And it was one of them funny trifles with jelly in, so bound to stain.”
”I only eat jelly when naked,” said Daniel. ”Now you two. I need to have what is known as a private conversation with my upset friend here, so we need some alone time.”
”Oh we won't make a sound,” said the old lady quickly. ”We are very good at being quiet. All the funerals we go to you see. You just pretend that we're not here. Unless you need any help of course.”
”Go away or I will report you for hara.s.sment,” Daniel shouted, losing his patience.
”OK, OK,” the lady muttered, shuffling away. ”Just trying to be neighbourly. We won't bother next time will we Bob?”
Matthew's sobs seemed to have abated. He looked spectacularly sad, his suit crumpled, previously perfect tie all askew.
Daniel looked deep inside for some inner strength. He was tired beyond belief and emotionally wrecked but he realised his job was not quite yet complete and he would allow no-one to say that Daniel Laker was a job-half-done kind of guy.
Matthew was now just staring into s.p.a.ce so he decided to plough straight in, in the hope that he could be tucked up in his bed with the Strip-O-Gram within the hour.
”So Matthew,” he said. ”Let's see. I guess there is a lot stuff going through your head right now.”
Matthew did not move a muscle so Daniel continued.
”Shall we break it down into manageable chunks? I always find that makes it easier don't you?”
Matthew turned his stare towards him but still said nothing.
”OK, let's get right to it shall we and start with you and Katy. This is the way I see it. You are unhappy. You see someone who reminds you of happy times and the world seems a better place. So much so you grab hold of it, wanting some of that happiness back. But it's false happiness isn't it Matthew? It's the happiness you remember from a previous time. The happiness of first love, first s.e.x, first everything. The most exciting time in your life. You can't get that back Matthew. Not even if you get back the person that you shared it with. It just doesn't work like that. Before you know it you stop talking about your favourite music, why you hate your parents and which lay-by you should make out in and start arguing over who last cleaned the toilets and why you never have s.e.x anymore. You don't love Katy because you don't know her. You know teenager Katy, not nearly forty Katy. Please don't tell her I said she was nearly forty by the way. She'd kill me.”
Daniel heard a sneeze from behind him.
”If I turn around and find you there I am calling matron,” he shouted. There was muttering and the sound of soft soles shuffling across lino.
”Where was I? So you see you were chasing a false happiness when you should have been sorting out why you were unhappy in the first place. You and Alison are married Matthew. At some point you loved her so much that you said you would forsake all others to be with her. That's huge. More than huge. You've got to find that place again with Alison. It can't have all gone. You can do it Matthew, I know you can and it will be even better this time because you will have two kids to share it with. Two of your very own kids to love between you. And before you say it, I know that Katy could be having your child but surely it has to be better that your twins have two parents who love them and that Katy's child has the same rather than messing it all up and doubtless s.c.r.e.w.i.n.g them up at the same time.”
Daniel sat back in his chair completely spent. He could say no more.
Matthew looked up at Daniel. Daniel waited for the words of grat.i.tude to come forth as Matthew undoubtedly realised that Daniel was perhaps the most insightful man he had ever come across.
”Daniel,” said Matthew.
”Yes,” said Daniel expectantly.
”Will you now just f.u.c.k off?”
Daniel held his hands up finally in defeat.
”I can do no more,” he said.
”Thanks,” muttered Matthew.
Daniel patted his shoulder and disappeared to get lost finding his way out of the hospital.
Matthew sat staring at the crack in the tile in front of his chair for a very long time. Tea trolleys trundled past him, mops flicked around him and a million anonymous pairs of shoes trudged backwards and forwards, all failing to interrupt his thoughts.
After about an hour his phone bleeping finally roused him.
It was a text from Alison asking what he was doing.
He took a deep breath, stood up and walked just around the corner to her room.
She had her back to him and he thought she might be asleep. He tiptoed around to the far side of the bed.
Alison lay there silently crying.
He sat down on the chair beside the bed.
”You're here?” she said.
”Why are you crying?” he asked.
”I'm scared Matthew,” she said in a very small voice. ”What if I can't do it? What if I let them down?”
”You won't Alison. You could never let them down. I'm the one most likely to do that.”
”Don't be silly. You'll be there when they need you.”
”I hope so,” he said. He s.h.i.+fted in his seat and felt something dig into his side. He reached into his pocket and pulled out the copy of Childbirth without Fear.
”Want me to read some of this to you?” he asked.
”No. I don't need books now Matthew. I just need you.”
”Really?”
”Really,” she said.
Chapter 25.
”She's awesome,” Ben said for the hundredth time, staring down at the bundle wrapped in a blanket in his arms.
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