Part 34 (2/2)

Of course he could see right through me. I wasn't hiding what I wanted from him. Not in the slightest. My light jeans a contrast to his dark ones, I pushed my b.r.e.a.s.t.s into his chest (thank the lord for high heels), my silky tan tank brus.h.i.+ng deliciously over my stomach, spurring me further, and breathed, ”Having dessert.”

His arms went around me then, one firmly wrapped around my back, pulling me devastatingly close, while the other hand slid down my body, over the curve of my hip to cup my b.u.t.t. He made a low noise of arousal in his throat, and the hand splayed on my cheek squeezed. ”We're gonna be late for dinner.”

I pouted, looking up at him with what Nat calls my Bambi eyes. I had practiced this look growing up. The time spent practicing clearly paid off. There was little I would ask for that my parents would say no to when I pulled these babies out. I lifted my fingers, s.p.a.cing them an inch apart. ”Not even a little play?”

He looked down at me with those liquid golden eyes and I knew I had him. He sighed dramatically before kissing my mouth, and he didn't do it half-a.s.sed. He never did. He kissed me deep, taking his time, tasting me. ”How can I say no to you?” Grinning, I lowered myself, slow and s.e.xy, 'til I knelt in front of him. He looked down at me questioningly, and then I reached up to undo his belt. His eyes widened a moment before he broke into a grin. ”Rock'n'roll, baby.”

He lifted his s.h.i.+rt a little to help me out. It took no time at all to unb.u.t.ton him and lower his zipper, and then with a swift yank, his jeans and boxer were around his knees. He was only semi-erect, but still looking too big and much too thick to fit entirely in my mouth. I wrapped my fingers around him, ignoring Max's hiss, then looked up into his eyes.

I knew men liked that. I had been friends with a guy in college, a total horn-dog, who once told me that guys loved when a woman was on her knees, looking up at them innocently. Even more so when the woman was wearing lipstick, apparently any color would do. He also told me that men loved when a woman maintained eye contact during a b.l.o.w.j.o.b. I was about to test that theory.

Max looked down at me, eyes hooded, mouth slightly parted. It was always like this with him. He had no poker face. He wore his heart on his sleeve, and I loved that.

I loved him.

This was still not something I was willing to put out there. h.e.l.l, I didn't know if I ever wanted to put it out there. I knew it was too soon. I knew it would freak the f.u.c.k out of Max. I decided to work on him slowly. If I spooked him, he'd run. I couldn't lose him. He was already part of me. So was Ceecee. I was done fighting it.

Max was my one exception. He was likely one of the only men out there who would not only support my work choice, but also be proud of me for doing it. And if long hours and weekends were shot, I know he would understand. After all, his work at the club was not during the most convenient hours either. But I was willing to deal.

I was happy keeping my secret, and would do whatever it took for it to remain that way. The only person I would have to careful around was Nik. The man saw everything.

Max gently reached down, cupping my cheek with one hand, while lifting my long hair over my shoulder with the other. I looked up once more, holding his heavy c.o.c.k, gently kissing the head. Blinking, I whispered, ”So big.”

He gripped my chin, his lips twisting into a small, s.e.xy smile as he rumbled, ”You like it, baby? Say you like my c.o.c.k.”

It wasn't really a request. It was a demand. My core clenched and I licked the sensitive underside. Speaking against his throbbing length, I sighed softly, ”I love it.” I love you.

My lips parted, and with him guiding me by his hold on my chin, I took in what I could of him. But it wasn't easy. For the amount of smart-a.s.sing and s.h.i.+t-talking we manage, my sisters and I have quite the small mouths. Curse it to heck.

Opening my mouth wide, I took in a little more, sucking him deep. Max threw his head back, one hand at my chin, the other now fisting the hair at my nape. At the slight pain, I moaned around him, and his fingers tightened around the loose strands of my hair as he gently thrust in and out of my mouth.

At one point, he thrust a little too hard without meaning to and I gagged. Imagine my shock when that only fueled Max's fire. The dirty f.u.c.ker.

I knew the exact moment he lost control. His hooded eyes trained on where my mouth wrapped around his c.o.c.k and he growled, a low, animalistic sound I was starting to love to hear, and I heard it every time I put my hands on him. I was wetter than I should have been. Giving head shouldn't be that much of a turn on, right? Regardless, I was soaked, and even though I wanted him inside me, I would settle for watching Max lose control, because watching Max lose control was becoming my most favorite thing to witness.

The hand in my hair loosened before both of his hands cupped my cheeks. He made low rumbling noises in his throat as he quickened his thrusts, his brows furrowed in concentration, watching me closely. He was almost there. He stopped his thrusting and I began stroking him as I kept sucking as deep as I could. Breathing heavily, he cursed. ”f.u.c.k, baby, I'm gonna come.”

When he tried to pull out, I tightened my fingers around him and sucked harder, willing him to understand I wouldn't be letting him go this time. His eyes snapped open. ”Are you sure?”

Jeez, Max. I'm kinda busy here. You mind saving the questions 'til after?

Not willing to take my mouth off him, I sucked deeper, faster. His chest heaved with every breath he took, groaning in pure pleasure. It almost sounded like a purr. He released my cheeks to run his thumb over my bottom lip as I bobbed my head onto him. He muttered, ”So pretty. You're so f.u.c.kin' pretty.”

That was that. When he came, he came fluidly. This was not hot, harsh s.e.x. This was pure intimacy, made more intimate as I swallowed every spurt of the warm saltiness of my reward. His pleasure was my reward. We stayed that way for a long while. His throbbing c.o.c.k now softening, I gently released him, running my tongue along his still impressive length. He shuddered, blinking down at me drowsily.

I had to smile. I'd done that to him. I loved that so d.a.m.n much. So when Max opened his mouth, I'd expected something just as intimate as my act to follow.

I was wrong.

He helped me up, pulling me to him, then he squeezed me tight.

This is nice, I thought. I buried my nose into his neck and breathed in the subtle scent of his cologne. Pulling back, he kissed my cheek before tucking himself back in and smiling down at me. ”Thanks, cupcake.” He sighed, contently. ”I needed that.”

My face fell. I blinked. It took a moment to register what he'd just said. Obviously I had misread what this was. This date was not a step forward in our non-relations.h.i.+p. This was nothing to him. This was the reason I needed to hide my feelings. This was the reason I'd likely be single forever.

And that f.u.c.king sucked.

Pun intended.

Max The moment I said what I said, I saw the look on her face. The disappointment, the sadness and hurt. Did I really just thank her for one of the best b.l.o.w.j.o.bs in my life?

This is why I'm going to be single forever.

I'm a coward, and a royal f.u.c.k-up.

Chapter Thirty-Four.

Helena I manage to paste on a smile and quell down my stupid emotions enough to fake my happy, take Max's hand, and walk down to his car with him. As we drive, he holds my hand. I look down at our entwined fingers and my chest pangs. What that simple gesture means to him and what it means to me are two different things. It means everything to me. To him, it's just a sure sign he's getting laid later. I clench my teeth and roll my eyes as I turn back to look out the window.

You're so stupid. He doesn't care about you. He cares about Ceecee. You're being used.

Am not.

h.e.l.lo? Dignity? Where the h.e.l.l are you?

We made a deal. I knew what I was getting into. I shouldn't be so shocked, and truthfully, I'm not. Max never promised me anything. I was the one who let herself get lost in false hope. I knew better than to do such a thing. I'd never have the sweet love that Tina and Nik have, or even the pa.s.sionate love that Nat and Asher have. And maybe it wouldn't be so bad. Maybe I'd be content without it.

Then why is your heart aching just thinking about it?

I look over at Max, and as if he senses it, he turns to me. He searches my face, eyes narrowed before asking softly, ”You okay, babe?”

”Of course,” I lie easily.

His fingers squeeze mine. ”If you don't want to do dinner, it's okay. We can just get something to go and take it back to your apartment. Mom's got Ceecee for the night.” His dimple pops out with his smile. ”I can undress you and rub lotion into you. You know, give you a ma.s.sage.”

I smile at that. Why does he have to be so clueless in some ways, make me angry, then say something sweet. It's almost impossible to stay mad at him, d.a.m.n it right to h.e.l.l. I hide my smile by biting my lip. ”Rub lotion into me? Ma.s.sage me? Whoa. I wouldn't dream of putting you through something like that.”

Max sighs, bringing my hand to his mouth, kissing my knuckles. ”I admit it would be a trial, but I know together, we'll get through it.”

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