Part 11 (2/2)
Lady Maccon stopped him as he pa.s.sed. ”Do not bother to see them unpacked, Rumpet. Not just yet. We shall see if we can arrange this differently.”
The butler nodded. ”Very good, my lady.”
Lady Maccon followed her sister into the house.
Felicity had found her way into the front parlor and was pouring herself some of the tea. Without asking. She glanced up when Lady Maccon entered. ”I do declare, you are looking rather puffy about the face, sister. Have you gained weight since I saw you last? You know, I do so worry about your health.”
Alexia refrained from commenting that the only worry Felicity felt was over next season's gloves. She sat down across from her sister, folded her arms ostentatiously over her ample chest, and glared. ”Out with it. Why would you possibly allow yourself to be foisted off on me?”
Felicity c.o.c.ked her head to one side, sipped her tea, and demurred. ”Well, your complexion seems to have improved. One might even mistake you for an Englishwoman. That is nice. I should never have believed it had I not seen it for myself.”
Pale skin had been popular in England since vampires officially emerged into, and took over, much of the higher ranks. But Alexia had her father's Italian skin and no interest in fighting its inclinations merely to look like one of the undead. ”Felicity,” she said sharply.
Felicity looked to one side and tutted in annoyance. ”Well, if I must. Let me simply say it has become desirable for me to absent myself from London for a short while. Evylin is being overly smug. You know how she gets if she has something and she knows you want it.”
”The truth, Felicity.”
Felicity glanced about as though looking for some clue or hint, and then said finally, ”I was under the impression that the regiment was in residence here at Woolsey.”
Ah, thought Alexia, so that was what was going on. ”Oh, you were, were you?”
”Well, yes, I was. Are they?”
Lady Maccon narrowed her eyes. ”They are encamped around the back.”
Felicity immediately stood, brus.h.i.+ng down her skirts and plumping her curls.
”Oh no, you don't. Sit right back down there, young lady.” Alexia took great satisfaction in treating her sister as though she were an infant. ”There is no point; you simply cannot stay with me.”
”Why ever not?”
”Because I am not stopping here. I have business in Scotland, and I depart this afternoon. I cannot very well leave you at Woolsey alone and without a chaperone, especially as the regiment is is in residence. Simply think how that would look.” in residence. Simply think how that would look.”
”But why Scotland? I should hate to have to go to Scotland. It is such a barbaric place. It is practically Ireland! practically Ireland!” Felicity was clearly perturbed at this disruption in her carefully wrought plans.
Alexia came up with the most Felicity-safe reason for traveling that she could think of, off of the top of her head. ”My husband is in Scotland on pack business. I am to join him there.”
”Well, piffle!” exclaimed Felicity, sitting back down with a whump. whump. ”What a frightful bother. Why do you always have to be so inconvenient, Alexia? Can you not think of ”What a frightful bother. Why do you always have to be so inconvenient, Alexia? Can you not think of me me and my needs for a change?” and my needs for a change?”
Lady Maccon interrupted what looked to be a long diatribe. ”I am confident your suffering is quite beyond all description. Shall I call for the Woolsey carriage so you can at least travel back to town in style?”
Felicity looked glum. ”It cannot be countenanced, Alexia. Mama will have your head if you send me back now. You know how impossible she can be about these things.”
Lady Maccon did know. But what was to be done?
Felicity sucked on her teeth. ”I suppose I shall simply have to accompany you to Scotland. It will be a terrible bore, of course, and you know how I hate traveling, but I shall bear it with grace.” Felicity looked oddly cheered by this idea.
Lady Maccon blanched. ”Oh no, absolutely not.” A week or more in her sister's company and she would go categorically bonkers.
”I think the idea has merit.” Felicity grinned. ”I could instruct you on the subject of appearance.” She gave Alexia a sweeping up-and-down look. ”It is clear you are in need of expert guidance. Now, if I were Lady Maccon, I should not choose such somber attire.”
Lady Maccon rubbed at her face. It would make for a good cover story, removing her deranged sister from London for a desperately needed airing. Felicity was just self-involved enough not to notice or remark upon any of Alexia's muhjah activities. Plus, it would give Angelique someone else to fuss over for a change.
That decided matters.
”Very well. I hope you are prepared to travel by air. We are catching a dirigible this afternoon.”
Felicity looked uncharacteristically unsure of herself. ”Well, if I must, I must. But I am certain I did not pack the correct bonnet for air travel.”
”Cooee!” A voice reverberated down the hallway outside the open parlor door. ”Anyone home?” it rang forth, singsong.
”Now what?” wondered Lady Maccon, fervently hoping she would not miss float-off. She did not want to delay her travel, particularly now that she must keep the regiment and Felicity separated.
A head appeared around the edge of the doorjamb. The head was wearing a hat comprised almost entirely of red feathers, all standing straight upright, and a few tiny puffy white ones, looking like nothing so much as an overly excited duster with a case of the pox.
”Ivy,” stated Alexia, wondering if her dear friend was perhaps secretly the leader of a Silly Hat Liberation Society.
”Oh, Alexia! I let myself in. I do not know where Rumpet has taken himself off to, but I saw the parlor door open, so I deduced you must be awake, and I thought I ought to tell you...” She trailed off upon realizing Alexia was not alone.
”Why, Miss Hisselpenny,” purred Felicity, ”what are you you doing doing here here?”
”Miss Loontwill! How do you do?” Ivy blinked at Alexia's sister in utter surprise. ”I might ask you the same question.”
”Alexia and I are taking a trip to Scotland this afternoon.”
The feather duster trembled in confusion. ”You are?” Ivy looked rather hurt that Alexia would not see fit to inform her of such a trip. And that Alexia would choose Felicity as a companion, when Ivy knew how much Alexia loathed her sister.
”By dirigible.”
Miss Hisselpenny nodded sagely. ”So much more sensible. Rail is such an undignified way to travel. All that rapid racing about. Floating has so much more gravitas.”
”It was decided at the last minute,” said Lady Maccon, ”both the trip and Felicity joining me. There has been some domestic difficulty at the Loontwills'. Frankly, Felicity is jealous that Evy is getting married.” There was no way Lady Maccon would allow her sister to seize control of a conversation at the expense of her dear friend's feelings. It was one thing to put up with Felicity's jibes herself and another to witness them turned upon defenseless Miss Hisselpenny.
”What a lovely hat,” Felicity said to Ivy snidely.
Lady Maccon ignored her sister. ”I am sorry, Ivy. I would have invited you. You know I would, but my mother insisted, and you know how utterly impossible she she can be.” can be.”
Miss Hisselpenny nodded, looking gloomy. She came fully into the room and sat down. Her dress was subdued for Ivy: a simple walking gown of white with red polka dots, boasting only one row of red ruffles and fewer than six bows-although the ruffles were very puffy, and the bows were very large.
”I am a.s.sured floating is terribly unsafe, even so,” added Felicity, ”Us two women traveling alone. Don't you think you should ask several members of the regiment to accompany-?”
”No, I most certainly should not!” replied Lady Maccon sharply. ”But I do believe Professor Lyall will insist upon Tunstell joining us as escort.”
Felicity pouted. ”Not that horrible redheaded thespian chap? He is so fearfully jolly. Must he come? Could we not get some nice soldier instead?”
Miss Hisselpenny quite bristled upon hearing Tunstell disparaged. ”Why, Miss Loontwill, how bold you are with your opinions of young men you should know nothing of. I'll thank you not to cast windles and dispersions about like that.”
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