Volume Vi Part 65 (2/2)

Agreed. Who shall begin?

SIMPLICITY.

O boy! who is the elder? Hast thou not heard, give flounders to thy elder?

WIT.

You mistake the fish: trust me, I am sure 'tis give plaice; but begin with a good grace.

[_Here_ SlMP. _sings first and_ WIT _after, dialoguewise: both to music, if ye will_.

WIT.

Now, sirs, which sings best?

SIMPLICITY.

Tush, your copesmates shall not judge.

Friend, what say you? which of us sings best?

[_To one of the auditory_.

WILL.

To say truth, there's but a bad choice. How will you sell the ballad you sang, for I'll not buy the voice?

SIMPLICITY.

Why wilt thou not buy my voice?

WILL.

Because it will cost me more money to buy sallet-oil to keep it from rusting, than it is worth. But, I pray ye, honest man, what's this?

SIMPLICITY.

Read, and thou shalt see.

WILL.

I cannot read.

SIMPLICITY.

Not read, and brought up in London! Went'st thou never to school?

WILL.

Yes, but I would not learn.

SIMPLICITY.

Thou wast the more fool. If thou cannot read, I'll tell thee. This is Tarlton's picture. Didst thou never know Tarlton?[239]

WILL.

No: what was that Tarlton? I never knew him.

SIMPLICITY.

What was he? A prentice in his youth of this honourable city, G.o.d be with him. When he was young, he was leaning to the trade that my wife useth now, and I have used, _vide lice s.h.i.+rt_,[240] water-bearing.

I-wis, he hath toss'd a tankard in Corn-hill ere now: If thou knew'st him not, I will not call thee ingram;[241] but if thou knewest not him, thou knewest n.o.body. I warrant, here's two crack-ropes knew him.

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