Part 1 (2/2)

Jenny I tremble.

Albert It's jenny. Arabella is with her.

Arabella So, it's you, sir, playing sentinel?

Albert Yes, yes, it's me, it's me. But at this time of day, what are you doing in this place, if you please?

Arabella Neither Jenny nor I sleep in the morning, so we came here to be under the trees and to see the sun rise and take the air.

Jenny (trying to be helpful) Yes.

Albert You are to watch the dawn and take the air from your window. You are conspiring here to betray me.

Jenny (aside) That wouldn't be a bad idea!

Albert What do you say?

Jenny Not a word.

Albert Prudent, circ.u.mspect girls who are not up to some intrigue sleep tranquilly in their bed--and don't take the air so early--be it hot or cold.

Jenny And how, if you please, do you expect us to rest when all night one hears nothing but coming, going, opening, closing, crying, tossing, scratching, running, sneezing, coughing? When, by great luck, I fall asleep--a frightful jangling of keys starts me awake. I try to go back to sleep, but cannot. A Wandering Jew who does evil with the greatest pleasure, a mischievous imp vomited by h.e.l.l to earth, to make an eternal war with sleeping men begins his uproar and annoys us all.

Albert And what is this imp and Wandering Jew?

Jenny You.

Albert Me?

Jenny Yes, you. I believe that these rude manners come from some spirit who is in need of prayers. And to better understand whether this angry thing was soul or body, that made this Sabbath, one evening, I took a cord with two ends firmly attached upstairs. It had the effect I hoped. So soon as all were retired to sleep, I waited in person without noise or light, on guard in a corner. I wasn't long waiting.

So pitty-pat down the spirit came, noisily tumbling over the cord. He measured the stairs with his nose. Suddenly, I heard him cry: ”Help, I am dead.” As these cries increased--at which I laughed very much--I ran and found you spread out--with an apostrophe in place of your face. Your nose gave proof that you were a body and not a spirit.

Albert Ah, miserable scoundrel, adherent of the devil! It was you who played that abominable trick. You wished to kill me with this cursed act!

Jenny (innocently) No, it was only to trap the ghost.

Albert I don't know what prevents me from beating you up!

Arabella Sir, easy.

Albert You, too, my pretty, could earn some slaps. Shut up, if you please. To punish her audacity, I will drive her from my house. How do you like that?

Jenny (crying) Just heaven, what a sentence. Sir--

Albert (adamant) No, out of the nest, if you please.

Jenny (laughing) Ah, my word, sir, you flatter yourself if you think that leaving your sad company will make me suffer the least pang. A school boy leaving his tutor, a woman a long time celibate who leaves her relatives to get married--a slave who leaves the hands of his masters, an old prisoner who breaks his chains after thirty years, an heir who sees his uncle give up the ghost, a husband when the plague takes his plaguey wife--doesn't have half the pleasure I take in receiving from you this happy discharge.

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