Part 18 (2/2)
”Tell me what you want to know; possibly I can enlighten you.”
”I wish to know if you think it possible for an honourable man, who is neither a fool nor a c.o.xcomb, but who, on the contrary, has given evidences of his shrewdness and penetration, not to observe pretty quickly that a girl--how shall I express myself?--that a girl is deeply attached to him, even though no word of love has been exchanged between them?”
I was greatly embarra.s.sed. What could be her meaning? Was this simplicity or maliciousness on her part, to address such a question to me? After a few moments' reflection, however, I answered--
”I believe that, in general, both men and women very quickly discover the mutual feelings which they entertain towards each other, even though no words on the subject have pa.s.sed between them.”
”That is my opinion also now; but at the time I am referring to I was as inexperienced as a child. My father's friends always regarded me as an ill-bred girl, whimsical and capricious, a sort of savage whom n.o.body cared to invite into society either for the sake of their sons or daughters. The young officers who visited at our house would try to make themselves agreeable; but their conduct appeared so insipid, so ridiculous, that I only mocked them, and gave such biting replies as to disconcert the most intrepid amongst them.
”It was at this time that Lord William came to stay with us. He was introduced to me as a schoolfellow of my father's; at Eton he had been Sir John's f.a.g, and indeed was his junior by only a few years. For some reason, unexplained to me, it was said he had been obliged to leave England, and my father offered him the suite of rooms left vacant by my grandfather. Lord William appeared to be rich; he brought over an immense quant.i.ty of luggage, and paid right royally for any service rendered him. I believe, indeed, he had a private agreement with my father about the housekeeping expenses, though neither of them ever told me so. Now a housekeeper was engaged to a.s.sist me in the management of the house, and yet it was with the greatest difficulty that I could adapt myself to the duties of mistress of such an establishment. The presence of our visitor, however, greatly aided in reconciling me to my position.
”Lord William (I never knew his family name) was a man of letters, and had had a very valuable and expensive library sent over for his use. Moreover, he was highly gifted with the faculty of communicating his knowledge to others in a pleasant and agreeable manner. He was an enthusiastic lover of art and poetry; he could read and even speak several modern languages, and was pa.s.sionately fond of antiquities and ancient history. He knew--what we were all ignorant of--that the library of our own small town possessed works of inestimable value on these subjects, and I think this was his reason for choosing it as his place of sojourn on the Continent. At all events he made great use of the library. You may understand my surprise at seeing a man, evidently of high rank, who cared neither for hunting nor noisy pleasures of any kind, and who declared the happiest moments of his life to be those spent in his study, and yet withal he was a perfect gentleman and man of the world. The gentlemen said he was ugly; the ladies were silent on that point, but appeared delighted with the slightest attention he paid them. I thought he bore a striking resemblance to our Stadtholder William III., though less pale. He had a high forehead, strongly marked features, and dark eyes, which made you think of the piercing regard of the eagle.”
”Had he also the beak?” I asked, growing impatient.
”I have told you he was like William III. (of England),” she replied, looking at me in astonishment; ”his nose was curved sharply. But not to detain you too long, I will at once confess he exercised a powerful influence over me for good. I soon discovered that my manners were displeasing to him, and that he evinced towards me a compa.s.sionate sympathy, as if he regretted the sad turn my tastes had taken. One day I overheard him ask my father why he did not take me out into society. He gave as a reason my wild and brusque manners, and the kind of society to be found in a small town like ours. Lord William was not a man to be easily discouraged. He spoke to me privately about my previous life, and put all sorts of questions to me about my education. I told him everything, in my own way, without trying to hide any of the particulars from him.
”'Do you like reading?' he asked me.
”'Not at all,' I answered. 'I like society, men and action.'
”'But any one who does not read, and read much, becomes idiotic, and makes but a poor figure in society.'
”'If that's the case, tell me what I ought to read.'
”'I cannot answer your question right away; but, if you are willing, we will read together and try to make up for lost time.'”
CHAPTER XXIV.
”And so it was settled. He undertook to educate me and to form my tastes. He soon made me acquainted with the masterpieces of German and French literature, and discovered to me the beauties of the cla.s.sics in his own language; and I learnt from him most a.s.siduously that which Dr. Darkins never could have taught me----”
”And so well, that you fell in love with each other!” I interrupted, giving way to a movement of anger.
”Not exactly; but if you interrupt in that way I shall lose the thread of my narrative. It is at your desire I recount to you the story of my past life; and how much wiser would you be if I were to compress it into a sentence like this for instance: 'Lord William came to our house in the autumn, and left us the following spring'?”
”Without having become your fiance?” I said in agony.
”Without having become my fiance,” she answered in a dry, cold tone.
I was angry with myself. I had only too plainly shown that I was jealous of the praise lavished on this stranger. And what right had I to be jealous?
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