Part 52 (2/2)

No. Iben is right. Other people shape who I am. I cant make myself into who I want to be. We all have it in us to be murderers and executioners and war criminals.

Henriks arm tightens around Anne-Lises shoulders. What are you saying?

Henrik, for G.o.ds sake. I wouldnt be the woman I am now if I could choose. But Iben says we cant choose. Other people determine who we are.

Henrik s.h.i.+fts the box so he can sit facing her and takes her face in his hands.

Please, explain this to me slowly. Try to help me understand what youre saying.

Anne-Lise feels like throwing her gla.s.s of red wine on the storeroom floor.

Its like this. Iben watches nature films and says that people behave the same way as animals. She says that there are patterns of behavior that everyone conforms to because they are instinctive and predestined psychological laws of nature. Shes been studying developmental biology and social psychology and research papers about the psychology of the perpetrator. And she has written two articles about evil called The Psychology of Evil I and II.

I hate those articles of hers and her lectures too. Ibens outlook is so grim and black. Ive heard her say things like The more I learn, the more convinced I am that we would all act in exactly the same way as the perpetrators if we were in their situation.

I see. What do the others say to all this?

No one in the office ever argues with Iben. And I realize now that shes right.

Shes wrong, you know.

Anne-Lise mustnt start sobbing now, when all their friends are within earshot. She tries to be as quiet as possible. I dont want to be like this, Henrik. Im evil. She looks into Henriks face and senses him thinking: Oh, G.o.d, will this never end? He deserves so much better.

Anne-Lise. You are not evil.

But I wasnt sorry to hear that the back of Malenes head had been blown to bits, was I? If the others had died as well, I wouldnt have minded. Does that sound like the old Anne-Lise? Does it?

Anne-Lise drives Henriks large, dark blue car home from the wine tasting. He asks her to stop just before they reach the house where Anne-Lises parents live. Her mother has looked after the children, but he would prefer them to wait a little before picking them up.

Ive thought about what you said. Remember what Malene did. She was the worst of them; nonetheless, she did something that Ibens theories couldnt explain in a thousand years.

To sacrifice your life for someone who is not your child how would Iben get around that? She cant. And if Malene can do something like that, then there is something in all of us that is both unpredictable and potentially good. It exists in you. And in me.

They sit together in silence. Anne-Lise moves close to Henrik and rests her head on his shoulder. He puts his arm around her.

One week after the police interrogated everyone in the Center about Rasmuss death, Camilla starts pressing Iben to find out how the investigation is going. She feels nervous about her sessions with Dorte Jrgensen and is keen to know what is going on.

When Iben puts down the receiver, her hand is shaking. I spoke to Dorte Jrgensen. The investigation is closed. Malene wrote on her home computer that she was aware of having a split personality. She admitted to having killed Rasmus.

All work ceases. It seems unbelievable at first, and then Malenes image changes in an instant. They decide to phone again to make sure Iben hasnt misheard. Anne-Lise makes the call.

Iben is shocked, but then, they all are. They had put together a shared memory of Malene, like a jigsaw puzzle. Now it has come apart and every piece takes on a new meaning.

The rumors about Malene spread rapidly through the world of human rights. Anne-Lise hears Iben speaking to one of the callers: Naturally Im deeply grateful for Malenes self-sacrifice. Deeply. But I did wonder. It didnt fit somehow. Its understandable now. She was tormented by her guilt over having killed Rasmus. And, perhaps, she was mentally ill. That would explain a lot.

Iben listens to the voice at the other end of the line, and then continues.

Absolutely. What she did wasnt the response of a healthy human being. In fact, her self-sacrifice in no way contradicts the theories I discussed in my articles in Genocide News on evil.

chapter 55.

paul opens the front door with a bang and steps into the office, beaming happily at everyone. Hes barely over the threshold before he starts announcing his news. At last, I can tell you all!

Hi, Paul! Tell us what?

Its such a relief to be able to tell you. I promised not to whisper a word before it was official. Todays the day! Morten Kjrum has accepted a post at the United Nations in New York. His directors.h.i.+p at Human Rights will be advertised soon, possibly as early as May.

Iben gets in first. Is it yours for the asking, then?

So far, thats impossible to tell.

But you seem over the moon, right?

Paul slings his jacket over one chair and sits down on another. Put it this way: to be honest, the heavyweight contenders are Frederik and myself. Im the boss for this place as well as a member of the board at the Center for Democracy. Weve been very active at the DCIG, organizing things like conferences and other stuff thats kept us in the public eye quite unlike the Democracy Center. Take that successful Yugoslav conference at Louisiana Frederiks people didnt have a chance, organization-wise. It means that I have the edge. Also, Frederik removed himself from our board not long ago. One way or the other, hes lost quite a bit of power.

How long have you known this? Anne-Lise wants to know.

Two weeks.

Iben, Anne-Lise, and Camilla exchange glances. Its suddenly clear to all of them why Paul has behaved so strangely over the past few weeks. They pretend to be pleased for him, but it doesnt take Camilla long to see that the news is to their advantage too. Paul obviously wants to stay in charge of the DCIG and will set about merging it with the DIHR as soon as possible.

Iben will get a whole crew of intellectuals with whom she can argue all day long.

Anne-Lise will have other librarians around her. Sh.e.l.l want that, even if she and Iben make a great show of getting along so very well. Camilla can clearly see that Anne-Lise would love to have other colleagues to talk to. Now her dreams will come true, and without the ha.s.sle of looking for a new job.

Only one of them has any reason to worry, and that person is Camilla herself. She knows that when this kind of place merges with another one, the bosses will always try to save on secretarial posts.

Its only three oclock, but Iben starts clearing her desk. She seems very happy these days and has stopped staying late at the office every night. Apparently she sees rather a lot of Gunnar Hartvig Nielsen.

Her bag is packed and on her desk when that seedy old fusspot Erik Prins ambles in. As usual he stops at Ibens and Anne-Lises desks for a chat. He starts telling them about a new book he has come across. Talking about it reminds him of Ibens articles.

He continues in his high-pitched voice: You know the way everyone harps on about how odd it is that concentration camp officers would go home from work and behave like decent loving fathers? Whats so odd about it? Were all like that.

Iben nods and says she agrees. It seems shes not in such a great hurry to get home after all. They chat away and then she launches into one of her spiels.

We let rip with idealism and grand words, but its nothing but rationalizations of our own egoistic behavior. Not only do we lie to others; we also lie to ourselves. Each one of us lives inside a house of mirrors our own instinctive self-righteousness distorts the way we view reality so that we can justify our actions to ourselves. And theres no way we can escape.

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