Part 77 (1/2)
”And such as Jane was, all true servants are.”
The ancients used to bribe the Oracle of Delphi. Curious.
CHAPTER XXIV.
Lucy's twenty-first birthday dawned, but it was not to her the gay exulting day it is to some. Last night her uncle and aunt had gone a step further, and, instead of kissing her ceremoniously, had evaded her. They were drawing matters to a climax: once of age, each day would make her more independent in spirit as in circ.u.mstances. This morning she hoped custom would s.h.i.+eld her from unkindness for one day at least. But no, they made it clear there was but one way back to their smiles. Their congratulations at the breakfast-table were cold and constrained; her heart fell; and long before noon on her birthday she was crying. Thus weakened, she had to encounter a thoroughly prepared attack. Mr. Bazalgette summoned her to his study at one o'clock, and there she found him and Mrs. Bazalgette and Mr. Fountain seated solemnly in conclave. The merchant was adding up figures.
”Come, now, business,” said he. ”d.i.c.k has added them up: his figures are in that envelope; break the seal and open it, Lucy. If his total corresponds with mine, we are right; if not, I am wrong, and you will all have to go over it with me till we are right.” A general groan followed this announcement. Luckily, the sum totals corresponded to a fraction.
Then Mr. Bazalgette made Lucy a little speech.
”My dear, in laying down that office which your amiable nature has rendered so agreeable, I feel a natural regret on your account that the property my colleague there and I have had to deal with on your account has not been more important. However, as far as it goes, we have been fortunate. Consols have risen amazingly since we took you off land and funded you. The rise in value of your little capital since your mother's death is calculated on this card. You have, also, some loose cash, which I will hand over to you immediately. Let me see--eleven hundred and sixty pounds and five s.h.i.+llings. Write your name in full on that paper, Lucy.”
He touched a bell; a servant came. He wrote a line and folded it, inclosing Lucy's signature.
”Let this go to Mr. Hardie's bank immediately. Hardie will give you three per cent for your money. Better than nothing. You must have a check-book. He sent me a new one yesterday. Here it is; you shall have it. I wonder whether you know how to draw a check?”
”No, uncle.”
”Look here, then. You note the particulars first on this counter-foil, which thus serves in some degree for an account-book. In drawing the check, place the sum in letters close to these printed words, and the sum in figures close to the pound. For want of this precaution, the holder of the check has been known to turn a 10 pound check into 110 pounds.”
”Oh how wicked!”
”Mind what you say. Dexterity is the only virtue left in England; so we must be on our guard, especially in what we write with our name attached.”
”I must say, Mr. Bazalgette, you are unwise to put such a sum of money into a young girl's hands.”
”The young girl has been a woman an hour and ten minutes, and come into her property, movables, and cash aforesaid.”
”If you were her real friend, you would take care of her money for her till she marries.”
”The eighth commandment, my dear, the eighth commandment, and other primitive axioms: _suum cuique,_ and such odd sayings: 'Him as keeps what isn't hisn, soon or late shall go to prison,' with similar apothegms. Total: let us keep the British merchant and the Newgate thief as distinct as the times permit. Fountain and Bazalgette, account squared, books closed, and I'm off!”
”Oh, uncle, pray stay!” said Lucy. ”When you are by me, Rect.i.tude and Sense seem present in person, and I can lean on them.”
”Lean on yourself; the law has cut your leading-strings. Why patch 'em? It has made you a woman from a baby. Rise to your new rank.
Rect.i.tude and Sense are just as much wanted in the town of ----, where I am due, as they are in this house. Besides, Sense has spoken uninterrupted for ten minutes; prodigious! so now it is Nonsense's turn for the next ten hours.” He made for the door; then suddenly returning, said: ”I will leave a grain of sense, etc., behind me. What is marriage? Do you give it up? Marriage is a contract. Who are the parties? the papas and mammas, uncles and aunts? By George, you would think so to hear them talk. No, the contract is between two parties, and these two only. It is a printed contract. Anybody can read it gratis. None but idiots sign a contract without reading it; none but knaves sign a contract which, having read, they find they cannot execute. Matrimony is a mercantile affair; very well, then, import into it sound mercantile morality. Go to market; sell well; but, d--n it all, deliver the merchandise as per sample, viz., a woman warranted to love, honor and obey the purchaser. If you swindle the other contracting party in the essentials of the contract, don't complain when you are unhappy. Are shufflers ent.i.tled to happiness? and what are those who shuffle and prevaricate in a church any better than those who shuffle and prevaricate in a counting-house?” and the brute bolted.
”My husband is a worthy man,” said Mrs. Bazalgette, languidly, ”but now and then he makes me blush for him.”
”Our good friend is a humorist,” replied Fountain, good-humoredly, ”and dearly loves a paradox”; and they pooh-poohed him without a particle of malice.
Then Mrs. Bazalgette turned to Lucy, and hoped that she did her the justice to believe she had none but affectionate motives in wis.h.i.+ng to see her speedily established.
”Oh no, aunt,” said Lucy. ”Why should you wish to part with me? I give you but little trouble in your great house.”
”Trouble, child? you know you are a comfort to have in any house.”
This pleased Lucy; it was the first gracious word for a long time.